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It's not weird at all. I suppose orchestrate is a better word than initiate. But it gets the job done, unless as a guy you're scared to act.
I've never gotten into a school I was scared to apply to.
I never have received a job offer for a job I was too scared to apply for.
I've never been with a woman I've been afraid to make a move on.
Life doesn't work well when you live in fear.
I wouldn't suggest that for reading, but hey, each to their own. Just talk to your female friends. Easier. More direct. They know you (me) and know what I'm about so they can give personal feedback.
So it wouldn't be weird for a man to put himself around a women hoping she notices him? I don't have female friends.
Im sorry this would be weird for men to do and vice versa. Why do we have two different definitions of approaching for men and women?
Because some people still haven't overcome the hundreds of years of programming that's everywhere in the culture. Some have. Some haven't. Some women do approach. But as jillabean has said, it doesn't do any good. And depending on the woman, it can cause problems. Some men assume that women who approach are looking for easy sex, so that discourages some women from approaching.
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Quote:
Originally Posted by stinkerr
So it wouldn't be weird for a man to put himself around a women hoping she notices him? I don't have female friends.
You can try that. Can't hurt I suppose.
And why not? I really don't understand how a guy can grow up and not have female friends, unless they have no friends at all, or went to all male schools. I mean, fully half of the people I went to school with or work with are female. Maybe your situation is different, I don't know, but it would have been hard not to make any friends along the way.
So it wouldn't be weird for a man to put himself around a women hoping she notices him?
I've actually seen this done. Some shy guys will do this. They keep placing themselves directly in your field of vision until you finally react, and start talking to them.
How can it be crystal clear, when you know that many women do not approach? People are different. Why would you expect the same as your friend? Do you expect to have the same mathematical genius as Einstein, and the same musical talent as Beethoven? If not, why not?
I expect nothing from anyone. No interest is just that no interest. Its former friend please. Funny you mention Beethoven. While I do not possess his compositional skills, I am going deaf.
My experience is that if a woman is interested, she will find a way to make it known. With different women this can take on different forms, sometimes it can be somewhat subtle to the untrained eye, but it's usually there in some form.
If women are not approaching you, there is probably something wrong. I suggest getting to the gym and getting a great body and you'll be able to write your own ticket.
I expect nothing from anyone. No interest is just that no interest. Its former friend please. Funny you mention Beethoven. While I do not possess his compositional skills, I am going deaf.
But you've never given anyone an opportunity to become interested.
Because some people still haven't overcome the hundreds of years of programming that's everywhere in the culture. Some have. Some haven't. Some women do approach. But as jillabean has said, it doesn't do any good. And depending on the woman, it can cause problems. Some men assume that women who approach are looking for easy sex, so that discourages some women from approaching.
So women can make excuses for not approaching but not men?
And why not? I really don't understand how a guy can grow up and not have female friends, unless they have no friends at all, or went to all male schools. I mean, fully half of the people I went to school with or work with are female. Maybe your situation is different, I don't know, but it would have been hard not to make any friends along the way.
So women can make excuses for not approaching but not men?
For women there can be safety issues involved. It depends on the woman. Some women are unfazed if they don't get a reaction from guys, and keep on keepin' on being friendly and talking to guys, staying optimistic. But women who get harassed when they approach tend to give up.
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