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One of my good friends lives in Oklahoma City and he meets tons of women.
It's all what you make of it. If you live in a city of a couple hundred thousand people or more, there's no blaming the "dating market" in your area for the reason you are single. Oklahoma City has 600k+ people, so I don't want to hear for one second that there's "no available women" especially when my good friend and old roommate lives there is single and does awesome. I lived in a city half the size of OKC for several years, and did amazing in the dating scene there. I probably went on dates with 100-150 women over the course of a few years living there. Unless someone is in a city of less than 100k, or less than 50k, there's no excuses.
Right now I'm living in a city of 30,000 people, and even with this low population, I'm positive I could have dates with several women a month if I was single.
I've said it once and I'll say it a million times before. Until all these single complainers on this forum start taking 100% accountability for the reasons they are single as opposed to finding all these countless excuses, it will never change. There ARE TONS of changes people can do to make them seem more dateable.
They are not complaining. This thread posed a question and answers, not complaints, were given.
Perhaps the "complainers" know their situations far better than you do?
aside from being a little too jerk-like for ratings, i totally agree with the guy. and no surprise women hate hearing that kind of stuff, like we make it up or something. it's called experience.
Location: "Silicon Valley" (part of San Francisco Bay Area, California, USA)
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Quote:
Originally Posted by NewbiePoster
Dude, a spark happens on first sight only rarely in life. That's what dating is for--to see if a spark happens. It's a process.
This is exactly why I am not interested in dating. I want the "get to know you" phase to occur naturally with people I meet in the normal course of my life. I have found "the spark" with a few people already, using my method, but it wasn't mutual.
Quote:
Deciding to go on a date with someone you're not attracted to instantly isn't "settling". It's just dating, checking someone out to see if there's potential.
Completely disagree. What's the point of spending time with them for romantic purposes if you have no romantic feelings? I'm sorry but if I don't have feelings for someone I really have zero interest in "dating" them. Being their friend and spending time as friends, sure. But not "dating". You have to understand that not everyone is interested in doing it that way. In fact, most in their 20s don't do it that way anymore.
I'm not a guy, but I was single for a very, very, very, very long time before I got into my current relationship. To give you some idea, I dated here and there, once or twice even for a few months, but I went about 20 years in between "I love you"'s. (There may have been one in between, but it wasn't sincere).
First you need to stop focusing on your perpetual singlehood and accept that you may always be single. Once you do that, you'll stop worrying about it so much and you'll begin living your life accordingly. Some of the bitterness may even begin to fade. That's what I did. Poof, here I am 2+ years later into a healthy, loving relationship.
Live your life and stop worrying about finding a mate. Spend your time doing things you enjoy. Good things will happen.
I'm finding it hard to be positive about my social/dating life. I have been single for a while. How do you guys keep a positive attitude when no one seems interested in you or you have horrible luck in dating? It is literally one of the hardest things I have encountered. Being single for a while has made me a little bitter and angry but I try my best to not look so "down". It takes everything in me to smile and laugh with people I know because I have my s***** dating life on my mind. And I want to appear positive amongst women. What exactly gives off energy to the opposite sex? Body language, posture, facial expressions, etc?
I mainly want guys who have been single for a while to give me insight. Not women who have been single for a week. Thanks
I've said this a thousand times and I'll say it again. The best way to find someone is to "not" look. People sense desperation. Every time in my life when I wanted to be alone I would have women interested in me. I think it has something to do with the fact that you seem content when you are just living life without chicken heading every attractive women that walks by. It's just my opinion and perhaps it doesn't work for everyone. But you asked for opinions and there it is. Good luck.
I've said this a thousand times and I'll say it again. The best way to find someone is to "not" look. People sense desperation. Every time in my life when I wanted to be alone I would have women interested in me. I think it has something to do with the fact that you seem content when you are just living life without chicken heading every attractive women that walks by. It's just my opinion and perhaps it doesn't work for everyone. But you asked for opinions and there it is. Good luck.
This is true now that im concentrating on my work and hobbies women won't leave me alone the problem is that I want nothing to do with them or dating so its starting to get frustrating.
What women fail to distinguish is that they may have been getting very regular sex but not in a "relationship" per say and they will then claim that they have been "single" all this time. Which may technically be true but it is not nearly the same as a guy who cant get laid to save his life for the equivalent amount of time.
This is exactly why I am not interested in dating. I want the "get to know you" phase to occur naturally with people I meet in the normal course of my life. I have found "the spark" with a few people already, using my method, but it wasn't mutual.
Completely disagree. What's the point of spending time with them for romantic purposes if you have no romantic feelings? I'm sorry but if I don't have feelings for someone I really have zero interest in "dating" them. Being their friend and spending time as friends, sure. But not "dating". You have to understand that not everyone is interested in doing it that way. In fact, most in their 20s don't do it that way anymore.
Dude, I wasn't addressing my comments to you. They're for the OP.
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