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Old 10-29-2014, 09:13 PM
 
Location: Northville, MI
11,879 posts, read 14,204,961 times
Reputation: 6381

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I still get so shy around good looking women, and though Ive done my best to break the fears, but its been unsuccessful and I come across as a complete creep . I don't want people to think of me as a sociopath. In fact, I do have interests like hiking, cooking, rail fanning, and generally do communicate with most people quite reasonably, but add a layer of feminine beauty and I start crapping out. Why does this happen ? Its been the same old story for a while now, and I'm getting sick of it. Please, I need to change. This is very bad.
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Old 10-29-2014, 09:18 PM
 
4,038 posts, read 4,862,808 times
Reputation: 5353
How do you know you come across as a creep? Do you do the hiking, cooking, etc.? How do you get along with the women in those activities? Ease yourself into it by exchanging pleasantries with the women at work and in whatever your extra group activities are. Just get used to a simple exchange. "How was your weekend?" That sort of thing. Get comfortable doing that even with women you're attracted to. Once it becomes second nature, kick it up a notch. Take your time.
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Old 10-29-2014, 09:21 PM
 
Location: east coast
2,846 posts, read 2,969,939 times
Reputation: 1971
Ok, first calm down. You seem to be all over the place. What exactly have you gotten yourself into that you need to change? What is going on in your life that you need to change?
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Old 10-29-2014, 09:25 PM
 
Location: Somewhere in a Field of Hopes and Dreams
596 posts, read 627,530 times
Reputation: 683
Adi can you give us a little bit more info on what's been leading you to think this way? Did something happen recently?

I'm just not sure anyone can offer you any advice at the moment because only you're aware of the relationships and events happening in your life.
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Old 10-29-2014, 09:31 PM
 
Location: Northville, MI
11,879 posts, read 14,204,961 times
Reputation: 6381
Quote:
Originally Posted by NewbiePoster View Post
Do you do the hiking, cooking, etc.? .
Here is proof that I do hike & cook:

Top of the Catskills:


Schezwan Pan fried Tofu Rice:
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Old 10-29-2014, 09:32 PM
 
Location: Northville, MI
11,879 posts, read 14,204,961 times
Reputation: 6381
Quote:
Originally Posted by MMorena View Post
Adi can you give us a little bit more info on what's been leading you to think this way? Did something happen recently?

I'm just not sure anyone can offer you any advice at the moment because only you're aware of the relationships and events happening in your life.
Its hormonal, I have been experiencing sudden swings in my sex drive, which lead to creepy, uncommon reactions. I try to control them, as much as possible, but right now its beyond my reach. I know something is wrong, and its a mix of psychological effects triggering impulses on my hormones .
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Old 10-29-2014, 09:40 PM
 
83 posts, read 79,590 times
Reputation: 169
You are supposed to be shy around attractive women and if you are shooting out of your league, no amount of cooking rice-like substances and hiking will save you.

I read a study about shyness and the jist of it was to stop thinking about how the other person is perceiving you whilst talking to them. That is actually a selfish behavior. (not saying you are a bad person) Put yourself in a mindset of truly being interested in the other person as a whole being rather than an object of your lurid secretions.
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Old 10-29-2014, 09:44 PM
 
Location: Scottsdale, AZ
16,961 posts, read 17,337,436 times
Reputation: 30258
You really need professional help overcoming your female phobia/s.
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Old 10-29-2014, 09:53 PM
 
Location: Northville, MI
11,879 posts, read 14,204,961 times
Reputation: 6381
Quote:
Originally Posted by wizdum View Post
You are supposed to be shy around attractive women and if you are shooting out of your league, no amount of cooking rice-like substances and hiking will save you.

I read a study about shyness and the jist of it was to stop thinking about how the other person is perceiving you whilst talking to them. That is actually a selfish behavior. (not saying you are a bad person) Put yourself in a mindset of truly being interested in the other person as a whole being rather than an object of your lurid secretions.
The issue is, I need a way to show that I'm actually not a bad person. If I can make the attractive women (in my eyes) understand my true self like anyone else, then all is good. I never believed my hormones would react so vigorously. This is the first time I am going through this feeling.
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Old 10-29-2014, 10:04 PM
 
4,038 posts, read 4,862,808 times
Reputation: 5353
Join a hiking club. Go on singles hikes. Get used to the female energy. If it's too intense, hang out with the dudes on the hike. It's like fear of flying--you ease yourself back into the environment in order to conquer the fear.

See if there's a vegetarian cooking class anywhere in your area. Looks like you could use one. You'll meet women, too.
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