Time for an arranged marriage? (dates, children, sex, advice)
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I imagine being with a woman or even a bunch of friends discussing their first kiss, sex, etc. and everyone is saying they were 14, 15, 16 and I have to say that I was 30. Yeah I'll stand out.
Do you think you would regret not getting an arranged marriage? You seem to be in a perfect once in a lifetime position for it.
I'll be honest here...I don't think arranged marriages are any less or more moral than love marriages.
However, you state you were born in the USA. Well many persons with distant (and in I mean colonial times, whether white immigrant or African slave) don't often have much success. So by that I mean it may be your personality or approach more so than being of a different culture or being born to immigrants. I think being born to immigrants should make you understand the culture better than your parents do.
That said, I think much of this Indian man=undateable thing is overstated.
You may need therapy, because it seems to me an issue of confidence/motivation.
Also, means more desi women for me if you don't get ...j/k...you can date any race, it's a free world...though i'd kill to date somebody like Namita.
Yes, OP, I think you should seriously consider an arranged marriage. I'm sure arranged marriages have many benefits.
I'm curious as to why there hasn't yet been any mention of an arranged marriage between you and your mother/parents. Have you avoided the discussion if it ever came up, or has your mother/parents simply never presented or encouraged it?
Sounds you like you would be doing it for the wrong reasons IMO. You need to take a look at yourself. An arranged marriage might mean you have a wife and get past those "firsts", but it won't fix the problems you have within yourself.
IMO, it's never too late for first love. It's no different at 28 or 30 as it would be at 16. And btw, some people go through highschool and college without dating. You're not as far behind as you think. There was a university professor who used to post here, who said that many of her graduate students were still virgins, and didn't have time to date.
However, realistically speaking, often, in order to find the magic, you have to experience a fair amount of frustration. Finding someone compatible is the Holy Grail, and it's not easy. Be patient. Good luck.
OP, don't listen to Adi. He's in the same exact situation as you, except that he's just a couple of years younger.
But we are bound by the same dilemma, essentially. Except that I'm against arranged marriage. I don't see the point, TBH.
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