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So after 6 dates, it's only respectful to let the other person know that you are not interested. I do this with anyone I go out with more than 2 times, if they still want to see me and I don't feel the same, I would text politely say no and thank them for the time spent.
And to me, 3 dates is definitely enough time to know if I want to continue seeing someone. If I go out with someone more than 3 dates, there's some commitment involved. So it feels cheap some guy would disappear on me. Never happened to me before.
What you feel is appropriate and what others feel is appropriate are two completely different things.
Also, isn't this the man who had an intimacy problem a few days ago? I'm sure his ego is still very bruised by that.
Let it go already, honestly the more you write about it the more desperate and clingy you appear.
In my opinion only, there is no "commitment" involved until one says to the other "Will you marry me", anything before that is cheap talk.
What you feel is appropriate and what others feel is appropriate are two completely different things.
Also, isn't this the man who had an intimacy problem a few days ago? I'm sure his ego is still very bruised by that.
Let it go already, honestly the more you write about it the more desperate and clingy you appear.
In my opinion only, there is no "commitment" involved until one says to the other "Will you marry me", anything before that is cheap talk.
Yes it was the guy that had problem while being intimate.
I'm totally ok now. Just felt hurt when it happened. Like I said, it never happen to me so it was an ego blow, and I expected people to deal with saying goodbye the way I do.
I'm not desperate just didn't know how to deal with it and in shock. Now I learned
It really doesn't matter how many dates you have had. When one party shows that he/she is no longer interested, it is time to let it go. I don't recall that you mentioned that you have had the commitment discussion, so either of you can "disappear" according to your own way of showing that you are no longer interested. I agree with the suggestion of LET IT GO.
THIS^^^^
I agree the relationship wasn't at the point where explanations are owed if one party chooses to opt out. Sometimes these things happen.
I don't think it's right that it's become acceptable to ignore someone when you decide you don't want to see them anymore. I can understand fading out after a date or two, but six dates deserves an explanation. He doesn't need to sit down over a heart to heart, but she deserves at least a quick text saying I'm sorry, but this isn't working out. Ghosting sucks. It sucks to really be excited about someone and get radio silence with no explanation. You wonder if something happened to them, if they're just busy, if they didn't get your last message...it takes days or even weeks before you really understand their silence is the answer and you're really not going to hear from them anymore.
I wouldn't text him anymore, OP. And I'm sorry this happened to you. Maybe it was just six dates, but that doesn't mean you didn't care about him and you don't have any right to be hurt.
I don't think it's right that it's become acceptable to ignore someone when you decide you don't want to see them anymore. I can understand fading out after a date or two, but six dates deserves an explanation. He doesn't need to sit down over a heart to heart, but she deserves at least a quick text saying I'm sorry, but this isn't working out. Ghosting sucks. It sucks to really be excited about someone and get radio silence with no explanation. You wonder if something happened to them, if they're just busy, if they didn't get your last message...it takes days or even weeks before you really understand their silence is the answer and you're really not going to hear from them anymore.
I wouldn't text him anymore, OP. And I'm sorry this happened to you. Maybe it was just six dates, but that doesn't mean you didn't care about him and you don't have any right to be hurt.
Thank you for understand my feelings. Seems like every body else thinks ghost out is acceptable. What I ask for is just some respect. He and I not only went out for 6 date, we have known each other longer than that. I have always respected him. I would not ghost on him if I didn't feel a connection.
so I had 6 dates with this guy and I initiated a 7th date. He said we could plan something this weekend.
I texted him last night( Friday) to ask which of the following two days he'd like to get together, he never responded back.
Should I text him again to just make sure he does/doesn't want to get together or let it go?
He seem to be someone who's courteous and I didn't expect him to be rude and play disappearing. We consistently been seeing each other on every weekends for over a month now. So the sudden silence stings.
Relationships (in their beginning) are like chess - move by move and you can't make your move twice.
So no, don't text him one more time.
Thank you for understand my feelings. Seems like every body else thinks ghost out is acceptable. What I ask for is just some respect. He and I not only went out for 6 date, we have known each other longer than that. I have always respected him. I would not ghost on him if I didn't feel a connection.
Absolutely. It's amazing to me how many people on this forum think if you're not feeling it, then never speaking to them again is a totally reasonable way to end things. Ghosting is cowardly.
I think people here agree with you. It IS common courtesy. It DOES hurt to have this happen.
But he obviously has a reason that he does not really want to contact you, and you have GOT to LET IT GO.
Please, for the sake of your dignity and his, do not contact him again.
True...and something interesting I have learned: Even if a man is an educated professional, he is still capable of disappearing into thin air...leading you to believe YOU did something wrong, when in fact it is he who lost interest, or was distracted by a shiny female bauble, or just lost his backbone about communicating his true intentions.
Yes...classy. Very "classy" smh. introspectively, you have thank people like this for showing you their true colors before they took you even further down the garden path...and bringing you one experience closer to the man who detests fakery and pretense for the express purposes of seduction or conquest.
Last edited by laorbust61; 11-11-2014 at 10:21 AM..
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just didn't know how to deal with it and in shock. Now I learned 
