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Old 11-11-2014, 11:22 AM
 
16,715 posts, read 19,358,105 times
Reputation: 41482

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Quote:
Originally Posted by Mystic Dreamer View Post
4 days ago as I scrolled thru my IG activity feed saw that my boyfriend left a comment under a woman's picture where he congratulated her on her weight loss. He offered to take her to out to eat and will pick her up whenever then said "love you bye". After seeing this I immediately became angry and confronted him. I accused him of cheating on me with this girl but I didn't say anything harsh.

I'll admit when I'm wrong and will apologize and try to make things good with a person but I hate when they constantly throw things back in your face. I just think that's childish.
I think you're the one being childish, and you are the one throwing everything back in his face.

You don't need to have any boyfriend right now because it's obvious from your extreme jealousy that you don't have any self-confidence. You have to love yourself before anyone can love you.

I hope he goes and finds someone who won't go nuts on him over this kind of stupid crap.
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Old 11-11-2014, 11:23 AM
 
Location: USA
3,156 posts, read 3,340,450 times
Reputation: 5367
he just isn't that into you like you wish. Sounds like a playa. Get outta of his game and find someone who actually wants to be with you and invest into the relationship equally
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Old 11-11-2014, 11:26 AM
 
12,535 posts, read 15,174,474 times
Reputation: 29088
Quote:
Originally Posted by glenmorangie View Post
^^^
There's nothing to question here. A man with a girlfriend should not be going around offering to take other women out and telling other women he loves them. I don't care if they are "just friends." It's inappropriate and it's disrespectful to the girlfriend. At most he should be saying, "Hey, congrats. You look great." If he wants to hang out with her, it should be with the GF present, like a double-date. Instead, he is acting, publicly, like a single man.

Besides, what kind of sabotaging twit congratulates a woman on her weight loss in one sentence and then in the next sentence tells her he'll take her somewhere fattening for a meal? The guy sounds like an idiot TBH. But an attention-seeking idiot who wants everyone to think he's this player.

In the OP's shoes, the next time he wanted to get together with me, I would say, "Why? Seems you're into this other woman now. Go have fun. Bye."

And that would be the end of that.
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Old 11-11-2014, 11:27 AM
 
Location: DC
837 posts, read 958,545 times
Reputation: 885
Quote:
Originally Posted by Lilac110 View Post
There's nothing to question here. A man with a girlfriend should not be going around offering to take other women out and telling other women he loves them. I don't care if they are "just friends." It's inappropriate and it's disrespectful to the girlfriend. At most he should be saying, "Hey, congrats. You look great. Maybe we can double-date."

He is acting, publicly, like a single man.

Besides, what kind of sabotaging twit congratulates a woman on her weight loss in one sentence and then in the next sentence tells her he'll take her somewhere fattening for a meal? The guy sounds like an idiot TBH. But an attention-seeking idiot who wants everyone to think he's this player.

In the OP's shoes, the next time he wanted to get together with me, I would say, "Why? Seems you're into this other woman now. Go have fun. Bye."

And that would be the end of that.
Ha, that was supposed to be a thoughtful agreement emoticon. I agree with your reasoning 100%.

And regarding the bolded suggestion above, I've used pretty much the same line verbatim and it's highly satisfying to see the look on a guy's face when he realizes your happiness is not dependent on him and that he isn't welcome in your company anymore.
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Old 11-11-2014, 11:33 AM
 
Location: USA
3,156 posts, read 3,340,450 times
Reputation: 5367
Quote:
Originally Posted by Lilac110 View Post
There's nothing to question here. A man with a girlfriend should not be going around offering to take other women out and telling other women he loves them. I don't care if they are "just friends." It's inappropriate and it's disrespectful to the girlfriend. At most he should be saying, "Hey, congrats. You look great." If he wants to hang out with her, it should be with the GF present, like a double-date. Instead, he is acting, publicly, like a single man.

Besides, what kind of sabotaging twit congratulates a woman on her weight loss in one sentence and then in the next sentence tells her he'll take her somewhere fattening for a meal? The guy sounds like an idiot TBH. But an attention-seeking idiot who wants everyone to think he's this player.

In the OP's shoes, the next time he wanted to get together with me, I would say, "Why? Seems you're into this other woman now. Go have fun. Bye."

And that would be the end of that.
Well said. Dude needs to learn boundaries if he wants to be serious with a woman.
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Old 11-11-2014, 11:35 AM
 
4,613 posts, read 4,784,415 times
Reputation: 4098
The initial argument was silly and I think the women responding in this thread that are upset about that one piece are wound a bit too tight.

That said, everything he's done since then was very juvenile/passive-aggressive (you both are, but I'd say more him than you), so it's time to call it quits.
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Old 11-11-2014, 11:37 AM
 
Location: NYC
176 posts, read 977,024 times
Reputation: 126
Quote:
Originally Posted by Lilac110 View Post
There's nothing to question here. A man with a girlfriend should not be going around offering to take other women out and telling other women he loves them. I don't care if they are "just friends." It's inappropriate and it's disrespectful to the girlfriend. At most he should be saying, "Hey, congrats. You look great." If he wants to hang out with her, it should be with the GF present, like a double-date. Instead, he is acting, publicly, like a single man.

Besides, what kind of sabotaging twit congratulates a woman on her weight loss in one sentence and then in the next sentence tells her he'll take her somewhere fattening for a meal? The guy sounds like an idiot TBH. But an attention-seeking idiot who wants everyone to think he's this player.

In the OP's shoes, the next time he wanted to get together with me, I would say, "Why? Seems you're into this other woman now. Go have fun. Bye."

And that would be the end of that.
This is what I'm saying. What's more disturbing is that this girl is HIS BEST FRIENDS EX.

But in all honesty if he wasn't so distant for the past 2 weeks ( he was only sick for a few days) and asking to see me regular like he normally do maybe I wouldn't have blew up like I did. We was still talking to each other every day but he never set up any days or dates to see me like he always did. For two weeks you tell me things like we will hang out "soon" but you telling some girl "lets go out to eat WHENEVER YOU WANT AND FREE" like come on. How would you feel about that??? I don't understand why I'm called jealous because of this

I don't understand how questioning your partner when you know things are not normal is wrong. All thru this forum when someone ask a question someone always say "communicate". So why I'm doing those things I'm being calling clingy. I don't understand.
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Old 11-11-2014, 11:42 AM
 
Location: Brentwood, Tennessee
49,932 posts, read 59,761,388 times
Reputation: 98359
Quote:
Originally Posted by Mystic Dreamer View Post
*I immediately became angry and confronted him.
*I accused him of cheating on me with this girl but I didn't say anything harsh.
*After that I immediately became turned off and said "Ok I see where this is going. You just going to hold this grudge, be mad and probably won't ever forgive so I'll just leave you alone and stop wasting my time".
This is not communicating. This ^^^ is RE-acting.


Quote:
Originally Posted by Mystic Dreamer View Post

I don't understand how questioning your partner when you know things are not normal is wrong. All thru this forum when someone ask a question someone always say "communicate". So why I'm doing those things I'm being calling clingy. I don't understand.
You are acting in a childish, immature way, like middle-school BFs/GFs do. You are not treating each other like adults.
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Old 11-11-2014, 11:55 AM
 
Location: NYC
176 posts, read 977,024 times
Reputation: 126
Quote:
Originally Posted by Wmsn4Life View Post
This is not communicating. This ^^^ is RE-acting.
Understood. And that's something I learned for my next relationship.

However I meant what I said in the 3 point. I just can't see myself going back to him. I can't deal with people who hold on to grudges and can't let go of things.
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Old 11-11-2014, 12:01 PM
 
Location: Brentwood, Tennessee
49,932 posts, read 59,761,388 times
Reputation: 98359
Quote:
Originally Posted by Mystic Dreamer View Post
Understood. And that's something I learned for my next relationship.

However I meant what I said in the 3 point. I just can't see myself going back to him. I can't deal with people who hold on to grudges and can't let go of things.
Good! Don't!
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