Suggested threesome to partner, now she doesn't speak to me (married, younger)
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I don't know certain details like she does, I'm afraid of not doing it right, etc.
You know how to learn to do things you're afraid of not doing right? You do them. You ask a more experienced person to show you, and you just do it. Practice makes perfect.
Fortunately for you, you have a more experienced person to ask right there at home with you! Amazing! And she's been there all year long, just waiting for you to ask. Even more amazing!
If my husband approached me and said, "Hey, I asked a lady at work to come over and have sex with us!" I'd flip the f*** out. I would assume that he already was having sex with this person and I'd feel very betrayed.
IF there was any indication on your girlfriend's part that she'd be even remotely interested in a threesome, you still should have talked to HER about it first.
If my husband approached me and said, "Hey, I asked a lady at work to come over and have sex with us!" I'd flip the f*** out. I would assume that he already was having sex with this person and I'd feel very betrayed.
IF there was any indication on your girlfriend's part that she'd be even remotely interested in a threesome, you still should have talked to HER about it first.
What a mess.
I'm not sure I would assume he was already having sex with her - but I'd assume that he wanted to and had already thought about it.
Thats very disrespectful. I think you should have talked with your partner about other ideas for romance between the two of you. I'd never trust you again after basically asking some other woman to have sex. That's the same as saying you want to cheat on her. Not only was it disrespectful and offensive, but completely disrrgarding how your partner would feel about you asking to have sex with someone else instead of keeping it between the two of you. How could you be so careless and believe you are justified?
Why should she be the one choosing? I would obviously present her my colleague and if she didn't like her, we would try to find another one. Both should do the choosing.
To assuage her fears that you will like the other woman more than you like her. You did it backwards. Now she has to deal with the fact that you propositioned a woman you work with, someone she may not have even thought of as a threat before. Please tell me you didn't tell your girlfriend that this woman is "frisky" at work.
Is your girlfriend bisexual? If not, I think FMF is going to be a hard sell for you.
Thats very disrespectful. I think you should have talked with your partner about other ideas for romance between the two of you. I'd never trust you again after basically asking some other woman to have sex. That's the same as saying you want to cheat on her. Not only was it disrespectful and offensive, but completely disrrgarding how your partner would feel about you asking to have sex with someone else instead of keeping it between the two of you. How could you be so careless and believe you are justified?
I'm still trying to figure out how bringing home a bimbo for the bedroom was supposed to "help" the non-wife (gf) with her baby exhaustion/sleep deprivation issues. For all we know, his gf, when well rested, is a dynamo in the BR. He's never given her a chance to recover her mood and libido, to see what would happen, before he judged her as needing "spicing up". How unfair is that?
OP, mere apology isn't enough in a situation like this. Serious groveling needs to happen, serious self-deprecation. Then ASK her what you can do to help, to share the burden. Learn how to handle the baby, and offer her a day off to go to lunch with her friends or go shopping or whatever. Suggest building in days off and an occasional weekend off for the two of you. Make it clear you're turning over a new leaf. Tell her you really screwed up, and you'd like to reconnect with her after this first intense year, and help out more.
Also be prepared for the fact that she may not want to talk to you much until she recovers from this bizarre blow you dealt her. You may have to eat crow. Just brace yourself for it, and take your lumps if you get blowback.
Last edited by Ruth4Truth; 11-16-2014 at 03:38 PM..
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