Don't feel like I can ever please my girlfriend (relation, years)
Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
To be blunt, I think you two are incompatible. You are accustomed to a more "middle-class" style of life; she is more used to an upscale lifestyle and considers that to be normal. There are some couples that come from different socioeconomic backgrounds that are very happy together...but in your case, the two styles are clashing.
She seems passive-aggressive and that is a major red flag in anyone; in any situation. Both of you seem unwilling (maybe even afraid) to openly communicate with each other. I'm talking about serious sit-down heart-to-heart communication here.
However...by being compliant, you are enabling her, and making the whole issue worse. You are dangerously close to being whipped. People-pleasers are weak...they tend to get bossed around, walked over and ridiculed behind their back. IOW, insecure. Her family and her probably don't respect you. You need to get a spine. Speak up and make your voice heard. You're an adult, not an ant.
Most self-respecting men in this situation would have ended the relationship a long time ago.
To be blunt, I think you two are incompatible. You are accustomed to a more "middle-class" style of life; she is more used to an upscale lifestyle and considers that to be normal. There are some couples that come from different socioeconomic backgrounds that are very happy together...but in your case, the two styles are clashing.
She seems passive-aggressive and that is a major red flag in anyone; in any situation. Both of you seem unwilling (maybe even afraid) to openly communicate with each other. I'm talking about serious sit-down heart-to-heart communication here.
However...by being compliant, you are enabling her, and making the whole issue worse. You are dangerously close to being whipped. People-pleasers are weak...they tend to get bossed around, walked over and ridiculed behind their back. IOW, insecure. Her family and her probably don't respect you. You need to get a spine. Speak up and make your voice heard. You're an adult, not an ant.
Most self-respecting men in this situation would have ended the relationship a long time ago.
You will eventually become whipped. Women know when you are. Then she will use sex as a tool to get what she wants. I have known women like her in the past. It never gets better, just worse. I wouldnt invest too much more in this. If she doesnt get what she wants, she will probably find some one who will, while still seeing you.
He's not very happy with it, he agrees with my mom that she's spoiled and I've told them both its just easier to comply than having to apologize and beg to cheer her up from her silence.
This will get old one day and you will eventually implode, like really go off on her and it wont be pretty. I believe everybody have their breaking point. I don't know how you can have a long healthy relationship by always giving in to the things she want. Say what you mean and stand your grounds at least sometime man, I promise you it wont kill her . And start letting her pout about things, she will be alright.
You may both love one another but ultimately this will never work unless you're on track to become a partner in a law firm or its equivalent. There's nothing wrong with living in humble surroundings, but no one in her family will stand for it.
Unless you're really going to make a whole lot of money in your future career, you'll always be an object of pity.
If you love your girlfriend, let her find a blueblood while her youth and good looks hold up. A blueblood may fail to make her happy, but they won't blame him in the same way they'll blame you.
And your family will be happier if you find a girl who loves you for the right reasons.
It's not a completely unhappy relationship. The good times far outweigh the pouty times
Really op? Then why bother to post in my opinion. I mean if the good far outweigh the bad in this situation then you are actually doing pretty good. Nothing in life is perfect and the best that we can hope for is that the good do indeed outweigh the bad things in life. Sounds like you are just whipped at the moment.
This may be hard to hear, but here goes. First off, you need to break it off with her. You don't seem happy and I'm having a hard time seeing any positives. It's obvious to me she has little respect for you. I can see things only getting worse. Second, in future relationships you need to stand up for yourself and quit letting people walk all over you. People will only treat you this way if you allow them to.
I find it hard to believe the parents of a 23 year old would pay half the rent for her to shack up with her boyfriend. Seems weird to me. The rest of your post is simply two immature young people trying to make something work when it's broken.
I find it hard to believe the parents of a 23 year old would pay half the rent for her to shack up with her boyfriend. Seems weird to me. The rest of your post is simply two immature young people trying to make something work when it's broken.
If it is true, the family is hoping that she'll eventually tire of him. They just don't want her to live in the hood.
Sometimes families will let their child remain with the wrong person for a time, rather than cause them to rebel and marry in haste.
And to the OP, it's not your fault, but the silver spoon is always linked to money.
To be blunt, I think you two are incompatible. You are accustomed to a more "middle-class" style of life; she is more used to an upscale lifestyle and considers that to be normal. There are some couples that come from different socioeconomic backgrounds that are very happy together...but in your case, the two styles are clashing.
She seems passive-aggressive and that is a major red flag in anyone; in any situation. Both of you seem unwilling (maybe even afraid) to openly communicate with each other. I'm talking about serious sit-down heart-to-heart communication here.
However...by being compliant, you are enabling her, and making the whole issue worse. You are dangerously close to being whipped. People-pleasers are weak...they tend to get bossed around, walked over and ridiculed behind their back. IOW, insecure. Her family and her probably don't respect you. You need to get a spine. Speak up and make your voice heard. You're an adult, not an ant.
Most self-respecting men in this situation would have ended the relationship a long time ago.
I agree with everything you said. Unfortunately, there are a lot of guys like him that think they can't do better and stay in a bad relationship (if you want to even call it that) like this. I would have ended this a long time ago.
its pretty obvious your pockets arent fat enough for the lifestyle she's accustomed to
her parents paying ANY of the rent in YALLS place is already a problem...
if she cared about / loved you it wouldnt matter how broke you were and yall should be living someplace that yall can afford
did her parents also buy YALLS furniture too?
what you should do is tell her all this stuff you mentioned here about her sulking and how you think she isnt being pleased, xyz
tell her love it or leave it and both of yall can get with someone your own speed
Please register to post and access all features of our very popular forum. It is free and quick. Over $68,000 in prizes has already been given out to active posters on our forum. Additional giveaways are planned.
Detailed information about all U.S. cities, counties, and zip codes on our site: City-data.com.
Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
