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I met a male from the same college as me online. We have been texting for a week or a week and a half, not a whole bunch of conversation though, just a few messages per day. I acted like I wasn't very interested (because I wasn't that interested at that point) and kept saying that we should be friends. (So he may not have considered what I describe below to be a date).
On Friday I finally decided to go get coffee with him at about 9pm. I let him pick up me after saying "as long as you dont kidnap me lol". He responded you can give your roommate my information if you want. To which I responded "oh don't worry. I will". We talked a bit while drinking our coffee and then he took me back home. There wasn't a bunch of flirting or anything of that nature. I did tell him that I would be leaving early the next morning to go to my parents house (way out of state) for a week for thanksgiving. Right before we got back to my house he asked about meeting my roommate, I said he could but she was probably asleep.
He walked me to my door and then shook my hand and then left. He said some stuff while at the door but I don't remember exactly though. He didn't say anything about coming in. (My roommate was in fact asleep, I don't know if he knew that or not).
Afterwards I texted him "Thanks for the coffee " and he never responded. My friends said it is maybe because I should have said "Enjoyed spending time with YOU" or something like that.
Anyway, after the coffee I realized I kind of like him. So I do not know where to go from here since he did not respond. Any advice is GREATLY appreciated. Thanks.
IMO, you were very snotty with him and gave him nothing to go on. You took the "bitchy girls are hot so that's how I'll play it" thing a bit too far...again, just in my opinion.
So like an intelligent guy, he ignored your subsequent text.
Who knows, maybe he's just turning the tables and making you wait - you know, playing with your emotions like you've been playing with his. Really can't say (shrug).
Yeah, maybe thats it. It wasn't that I was trying to be bitchy though. I was trying to make sure that he didn't think I was going to have sex with him right away. I never know how to make sure that guys know I'm not going to just hook up with them the first night.
Yeah, maybe thats it. It wasn't that I was trying to be bitchy though. I was trying to make sure that he didn't think I was going to have sex with him right away. I never know how to make sure that guys know I'm not going to just hook up with them the first night.
I think you need to find a middle ground between "I'm not a one-and-done" and "gracing them with your presence."
I don't remember who sang it and what the song was, but it went something like this: "If you play hard to get, you won't get got!". He made his position very clear - he was (and maybe still is?) interested, but you were entirely too cold so he may well have decided to cut his losses and move on.
Then again, he may still be interested so don't write him off completely. If you really like him you can always just send him a text or something a day or two from now to say what's up. Then you'll know where you stand.
Finally, has he met your roommate? Is your roommate a girl and is she attractive? He alluded to passing his info on to your roommate, and then requested that he can meet him/her. So if your roommate is a girl, there's a chance he may have been trying to get to her through you.
Yeah, maybe thats it. It wasn't that I was trying to be bitchy though. I was trying to make sure that he didn't think I was going to have sex with him right away. I never know how to make sure that guys know I'm not going to just hook up with them the first night.
Uh, you show them that by going out with them, but not having sex with them the first night.
Finally, has he met your roommate? Is your roommate a girl and is she attractive? He alluded to passing his info on to your roommate, and then requested that he can meet him/her. So if your roommate is a girl, there's a chance he may have been trying to get to her through you.
IMO, you were very snotty with him and gave him nothing to go on. You took the "bitchy girls are hot so that's how I'll play it" thing a bit too far...again, just in my opinion.
So like an intelligent guy, he ignored your subsequent text.
Who knows, maybe he's just turning the tables and making you wait - you know, playing with your emotions like you've been playing with his. Really can't say (shrug).
Quote:
Originally Posted by ElysianEagle
^^^ what JerZ said.
I don't remember who sang it and what the song was, but it went something like this: "If you play hard to get, you won't get got!". He made his position very clear - he was (and maybe still is?) interested, but you were entirely too cold so he may well have decided to cut his losses and move on.
Then again, he may still be interested so don't write him off completely. If you really like him you can always just send him a text or something a day or two from now to say what's up. Then you'll know where you stand.
Finally, has he met your roommate? Is your roommate a girl and is she attractive? He alluded to passing his info on to your roommate, and then requested that he can meet him/her. So if your roommate is a girl, there's a chance he may have been trying to get to her through you.
Well my roommate is a girl. But she is engaged. And he doesn't know her at all. I was talking about her a lot so idk if thats why he said that, but they don't know each other. So I don't think theres anything to those comments but I've been wrong about stuff before so who knows.
But you think just wait a few days (like 4ish or 5ish maybe?) and just say whats up and see what happens? You think that's the best course of action from here?
Well my roommate is a girl. But she is engaged. And he doesn't know her at all. I was talking about her a lot so idk if thats why he said that, but they don't know each other. So I don't think theres anything to those comments but I've been wrong about stuff before so who knows.
But you think just wait a few days (like 4ish or 5ish maybe?) and just say whats up and see what happens? You think that's the best course of action from here?
There's no magic number of days. Check in with him tomorrow, but only if you really liked him and want to spend time with him.
It's odd that he asked to meet your roommate. It sounds like he felt like the date wasn't a success, so he was fishing for a new prospect. I think it means he's not that into you. But you could text on Friday to ask how his Thanksgiving was, and to say you had a boring time with your parents, or something. Just to test the waters, and let him know you're interested.
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" and he never responded. My friends said it is maybe because I should have said "Enjoyed spending time with YOU" or something like that.
