24, never dated in my life

[rationalmale18]

Your first step is to stop asking 40 year old women for dating advice.

[ElysianEagle]

Originally Posted by RecentGrad1

Couple comments:

• Bars don't work for me - the type of girl I want to date (one looking for a serious relationship) doesn't tend to visit them. Besides, I'm not a big drinker.

Don't be so quick to dismiss women you meet at bars. Plenty of perfectly regular women in their 20s go to bars and clubs, it's what so many people in their 20s do - don't judge a woman's character based solely on the fact that you met her at a bar one time. Of course, if it comes to light that she parties hard all the time, like several nights a week or something, that's a different story. I even recall reading a study that found something like 25% of all couples first met at a bar. And I've personally known happily married couples that met at bars too.

And no, you don't have to drink to be at a bar. My buddies and I would go to bars all the time in NYC and not drink - we were there strictly to hit on girls, no one ever gave us trouble for not drinking. And yes, we did meet girls. Many times.

Basically, by ruling out bars and nightspots, you're seriously limiting your options in meeting young, attractive women. I'm not saying that's the only way to meet them, but for people in their 20s post-college, nightspots are one of the best options, I'd say (second only to meeting through friends). Probably much better than online dating.

Originally Posted by RecentGrad1

• Online dating doesn't work for me. And I refuse to send out 10K messages before getting a response ("it's a numbers game" only goes so far).

Ok, this seems like a fair criticism. Although given your height, I find it hard to believe women aren't being responsive to you online. But w/e.

Originally Posted by RecentGrad1

• I'm not sure if I should try one of those dating/attraction seminars? But they seem too pick-up oriented - I want a serious relationship!

Thanks for any help!

Those are for people that have major issues in dating, the kind that need the dating-101 level advice. If you think you're that far behind, then perhaps these seminars can help.

[MogwaiLover217]

Originally Posted by Davros

Rule #1. Women are people. Therefore, interacting with women is learned about by interacting with people. Therefore, do more of it.

Rule #2. Social skills are obtained through trial and error. Therefore the best approach is to try, make mistakes, offend some people if they're easily offended (they'll live, by the way --- apologize if it seems appropriate to do so), and learn from your mistakes. Don't brow beat yourself for making mistakes. Everybody makes mistakes. Even a gold glover makes a few errors and even a Cy Young winner gives up some earned runs.

Ya but most guys have the confidence, charisma, social-skills, conversation-skills for getting a girlfriend by their late teens and early 20's, so they must have had good social training growing up

[MJ7]

How do you indicate you like a woman?

Hmm, you simply tell her.

I think the problem for most men with similar dating issues is that they are all afraid of rejection. It's a part of life, go out there and try, that's all you can do. Be up front with a woman, if they don't like you they won't pay any attention to you, that's it basically.

[MogwaiLover217]

I wonder why it seems most guys are instinctively naturally born with the confidence and social-skills in order to get a girlfriend, they have had this ability since their teens and early 20s

[Hawk J]

Recent Grad1,

Join a mixed bowling league. You will make friends of some young ladies you can ask for dates...

Learn how to dance the popular songs nowadays & popular dance styles. Go where there are bands, including salsa & country.

Learn how to play Pool, darts, shuffleboard. Many of the ladies enjoy these games...