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Guys whine more than women about not getting laid. The whining and virgin threads is like clockwork in here; booohooo (violin playing) Lol
I've always viewed virginity like this as I've had this discussion with women in the past. It doesn't bother women, as much as men, to have dry spells, because they have so much more available to them to pleasure themselves. A sex shop has movies for men, but the toys are mostly female driven. For women, they miss the closeness and touch of a man, to where men generally miss more of the physical aspect of it and could do without the closeness and touch of a woman.
I know a few women who have had 1 year dry spells and it really didn't bother them. They would have moments to where they would feel frisky, and then they would use their toys, and be fine. The only time it was a problem for them, is when they went off their dry spell with a man. They found themselves wanting it more than ever if the guy was good.
Also, men have a tendency to poke fun at other men who are virgins late in life. The movie "40 Year Old Virgin" lays that out plain as day. I was never pressured from my friends at 22 when I was still a virgin myself. For me, I put pressure on myself, because I couldn't join in the highly sexual conversations my friends were having.
Women have a tendency not to talk about their sexual endeavors, unless it involves a man they are involved in. Men talk about their "conquest" and women talk about how great their sex life is with their man. It's a difference of perspective.
I've met and seen a lot of girls who f'up and put their foots in their mouths. I'm pretty sure girls have a lot of the same problems guys do but they just don't complain about it the same way.
I've always viewed virginity like this as I've had this discussion with women in the past. It doesn't bother women, as much as men, to have dry spells, because they have so much more available to them to pleasure themselves. A sex shop has movies for men, but the toys are mostly female driven. For women, they miss the closeness and touch of a man, to where men generally miss more of the physical aspect of it and could do without the closeness and touch of a woman.
I know a few women who have had 1 year dry spells and it really didn't bother them. They would have moments to where they would feel frisky, and then they would use their toys, and be fine. The only time it was a problem for them, is when they went off their dry spell with a man. They found themselves wanting it more than ever if the guy was good.
Also, men have a tendency to poke fun at other men who are virgins late in life. The movie "40 Year Old Virgin" lays that out plain as day. I was never pressured from my friends at 22 when I was still a virgin myself. For me, I put pressure on myself, because I couldn't join in the highly sexual conversations my friends were having.
Women have a tendency not to talk about their sexual endeavors, unless it involves a man they are involved in. Men talk about their "conquest" and women talk about how great their sex life is with their man. It's a difference of perspective.
I think your assessment is pretty spot on. I think there is definitely more societal pressure on men to be sexually active. Whereas women do not have the same type of societal pressure. In fact, it's sort of frowned upon if they are highly-sexually active. For example, my buddy says that he doesn't want to be with a girl who has had more than 12-15 sexual partners in life, all while he's currently enjoying a FWB and trying to get as much sex as possible with as little attachment as possible. Men who incessantly complain about their lack of dating/relationship success are usually inside their own heads causing a raucous. But let's also not pretend that there aren't women doing the same thing via other channels.
It is because of that 80-20 rule that dating websites report.
That is 80% of women are interested in 20% of men.
most women consider a man physical attributes, ethnicity, smile, teeth, hair,face structure before anything else.
so chances are before he opens his mouth she is already leaning toward whether she likes him or not.
on top of that in the past 30 years Hollywood has been bombarding us with what a sexy man or sexy woman should look like.
so amidst this "Sexy" men would disproportionately benefit from company of women. couple this with the fact that some men would have no problem with being attached to multiple women at a time and then you see why some men are left with no mates.
It is similar (although not exactly the same thing) you see with animals. One lion having multiple mates. while other adult male lions are roaming around getting nothing.
maybe we are not that superior of an Animal after all.
It is because of that 80-20 rule that dating websites report.
That is 80% of women are interested in 20% of men.
most women consider a man physical attributes, ethnicity, smile, teeth, hair,face structure before anything else.
so chances are before he opens his mouth she is already leaning toward whether she likes him or not.
on top of that in the past 30 years Hollywood has been bombarding us with what a sexy man or sexy woman should look like.
so amidst this "Sexy" men would disproportionately benefit from company of women. couple this with the fact that some men would have no problem with being attached to multiple women at a time and then you see why some men are left with no mates.
It is similar (although not exactly the same thing) you see with animals. One lion having multiple mates. while other adult male lions are roaming around getting nothing.
maybe we are not that superior of an Animal after all.
I haven't found the bold to be true. Looks matter, of course, but they matter more to men than to women generally. I cared more about a sense of humor, employment and kindness than appearance. Most of the women I know feel the same.
I haven't found the bold to be true. Looks matter, of course, but they matter more to men than to women generally. I cared more about a sense of humor, employment and kindness than appearance. Most of the women I know feel the same.
Women keep saying that. and yes that can become true overtime as women gain experience.
but in the short to intermediate term women select the man with visible attributes over the man with hidden attributes with more frequency.
how else could you explain athletes in high schools, colleges do so much better than other students.
and how could you explain students with top grades not being the most successful in terms of dating in an Academic setting.
It is simple rules of probability.
Overtime money (better education) comes to the rescue of those with less physical attributes to find a mate. but it still does not mean they have the same frequency of success as those with visible attributes.
After being in this forum for a few months it seems the majority of the 'Never had a GF/BF' or 'I'm a XX old virgin' have been started by men. Is it because men are more open to talking about their lack of a love life or is it because men have it harder when it comes to love?
It is pretty rare seeing a thread by a woman saying she's never had a BF and has never kissed a man and is 25+ years old. Or any threads by 30+ year old virgin women.
I think it's more that women don't go around complaining about it as much. We tend not to sit around grousing about not getting laid, not because it's easier for us to to so, but because we know there is more to life than that. We also tend to have larger social networks than men. If we're going to talk about it, we do so in private to friends.
As for the trope that women can get sex more easily, oh SHUT UP with that already, guys, really.
Yeah, sure, it's easy to pick up some guy in a bar who will treat you like an assortment of holes, not give a crap about your satisfaction or pleasure, most likely finish too quickly, potentially give you a disease, and possibly knock you up in the process, and on a really bad day, possibly turn out to be some kind of criminal. Oh, yes, that is just SO much fun, HOLD ME BACK.
You men need to stop projecting your physiology onto us women. You are pretty much guaranteed an orgasm if you have intercourse. We are not. So availability doesn't mean jack squat. Just because men are there to screw, that doesn't mean it will be fun to screw them, and so yep, we get to pick and choose based on who seems to have his act together best, and...
After being in this forum for a few months it seems the majority of the 'Never had a GF/BF' or 'I'm a XX old virgin' have been started by men. Is it because men are more open to talking about their lack of a love life or is it because men have it harder when it comes to love?
It is pretty rare seeing a thread by a woman saying she's never had a BF and has never kissed a man and is 25+ years old. Or any threads by 30+ year old virgin women.
Women have their gf's to talk to, and there's no stigma for women who have never dated. Men can't bring this up with other men. Their only recourse is the internet, where they're anonymous so it's non-embarrassing.
I haven't found the bold to be true. Looks matter, of course, but they matter more to men than to women generally. I cared more about a sense of humor, employment and kindness than appearance. Most of the women I know feel the same.
Through my own experience, I find women are more critical about appearance than men (just not as vocal about it)
A lot of men are so desperate these days, they're more willing to dig deeper in the dumpster in order to get laid. Hehe.
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