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I got friend zoned by a girl I was with for two years. We live two hours apart so the relationship at times felt long distance. We'd see each other every weekend. For whatever reason she wanted a change. She wanted someone closer. She has a new boyfriend now.
So, I tried to be the good friend for awhile, but, it just wasn't the same. I wasn't getting the warmth from her that I used to. I didn't expect things would be the same as they were before, but, she started treating me indifferently.
So, I couldn't keep the friend thing going. I figured the best thing for me to do was to just be completely honest with how I felt and then just move on from there. So, I wrote an email where I basically said that I was in love with her and that I felt we were soul mates.
I figured, why not? I might as well just say how I feel rather than try to pretend to be a friend and hide my feelings. And, it actually felt really good to say what I said.
So a few weeks passed and I hadn't heard from her. Then I got a response. She said she didn't reply sooner because she had to let it all sink in. She asked how I was doing and hoped I was doing well etc. But didn't say much else.
A few days later she texted me that she wasn't happy with her current situation.
The way I see it is, if she didn't still feel something for me, that soul mate letter would have totally scared her off and she wouldn't have responded at all. I know if a girl sent me a letter saying we were soul mates and I didn't agree I'd probably not respond.
So, it's a bit confusing. She responded (when she could have just used my letter as a reason not to respond anymore) but when she responded she didn't touch the whole soul mate thing.
Any advice? Back off a bit again and let her come to me on her own terms? Are her responses a sign that she doesn't want to lose me?
There's no way you could know if she's your soul mate. You didn't even see each other day in/day out.
I should have mentioned that we have known each other for about eight years did see each other day in/day out before she went to graduate school. But, most of our dating relationship we have lived two hours apart.
What was the situation for the breakup, other than you stating that she wanted a change. Was it you or her that broke up?
Speaking from personal experience, opening your heart to a girl in that sort of situation isn't always going to work.
There's a reason why she wanted a break in the first place.
I'm sure if she really wanted to be with you in that intimate sort of way you want, she would have said so herself a while ago. Some girls don't like being put on the spot like that, so they'll try to 'ease' away from the situation.
One piece of advice I learned a long time ago from an online relationship site (Doc Love), is that a girl should always have a higher interest level in the guy, than vice versa (or appear that way).
That's just me though, and my honest opinion. This situation may be different and end up happily for the OP.
What was the situation for the breakup, other than you stating that she wanted a change. Was it you or her that broke up?
Speaking from personal experience, opening your heart to a girl in that sort of situation isn't always going to work.
There's a reason why she wanted a break in the first place.
I'm sure if she really wanted to be with you in that intimate sort of way you want, she would have said so herself a while ago. Some girls don't like being put on the spot like that, so they'll try to 'ease' away from the situation.
One piece of advice I learned a long time ago from an online relationship site (Doc Love), is that a girl should always have a higher interest level in the guy, than vice versa (or appear that way).
That's just me though, and my honest opinion. This situation may be different and end up happily for the OP.
She broke up with me. Yes, there's a reasons people break up. And,there are reasons people get back together.
We actually already went through the "ease away" phase. We were barely talking the two months prior to the email. So, her responding to the email is not about wanting to ease away.
I just figured I had nothing to lose and I might as well just lay it all out there and let her know how I feel. Yeah, I agree that opening your heart to a girl is risky. I didn't want to continue just being a friend where I am such a low priority. So, I just took the risk and told her how I felt.
She broke up with me. Yes, there's a reasons people break up. And,there are reasons people get back together.
We actually already went through the "ease away" phase. We were barely talking the two months prior to the email. So, her responding to the email is not about wanting to ease away.
I just figured I had nothing to lose and I might as well just lay it all out there and let her know how I feel. Yeah, I agree that opening your heart to a girl is risky. I didn't want to continue just being a friend where I am such a low priority. So, I just took the risk and told her how I felt.
You have to physically talk to her man. It's soooo easy to ignore an email or text, way less harder to stomp your heart verbally or face to face. Sometimes people don't know what they want until you tell them.
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