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I just need some objective advice because I'm not the best with relationships and don't have a lot of experience. There's this guy that I hung out with a few times and only considered a friend/acquaintance. However even though we got along I started to get increasingly uncomfortable around him because I knew that he wanted something more. But instead of him being upfront and telling me he was interested, it just started to change to him trying to take me out to dinner and trying to pay while I kept reiterating that we were just friends. I didn't outright state that I wasn't interested because he never told me he was, so it just seemed too awkward to be blunt. I used to be really shy and it comes back at times. So I distanced myself for a while.
Now he recently texted me about meeting up for coffee and me feeling guilty I said alright thinking it would be just a friendy chat as friends. However when I mentioned when I was free to meet up, it quickly turned into asking me to dinner. I don't want to lead him on and I feel really uncomfortable about the whole thing. We're not good friends or anything, so I'm tempted to just distance myself, though that sounds cold and I feel guilty just thinking about it. Any advice? I'm not trying to be mean to him, but he hasn't really been upfront either...
No I'm not attracted to him. I thought he was just a friend, but it's like he's trying to turn hanging out into dates without actually asking me. If he'd honestly asked me out, I would have gone out once just to see, though I don't think anything would have come of it. Then at least we could have cleared the air and either stayed friends or gone our separate ways.
No I'm not attracted to him. I thought he was just a friend, but it's like he's trying to turn hanging out into dates without actually asking me. If he'd honestly asked me out, I would have gone out once just to see, though I don't think anything would have come of it. Then at least we could have cleared the air and either stayed friends or gone our separate ways.
I don't understand what difference it would make if he asked you out on a formal date and you would go
"just to see".
What do you expect to be different? Going out as friends and going out on a date is basically the same thing.
I might try saying that then. Although I've said similar things before, but maybe that would be blunt enough to get it across.
I guess I feel guilty because I avoided him instead of dealing with it. I feel like I'd be best either being direct with him or going back to fading out of the friendship. We got along, but weren't good friends or anything. And is it even really a friendship if one person has another motive? I don't know. I feel like in some friendships and relationships, I go along with the flow instead of doing what's best for me...
Would it be the same thing going out on a date compared to as friends? I guess it wouldn't be any different since I already know it wouldn't be anything more than friendship. Just that if he was upfront about it, I'd have a better idea about how to respond.
No I'm not attracted to him. I thought he was just a friend, but it's like he's trying to turn hanging out into dates without actually asking me. If he'd honestly asked me out, I would have gone out once just to see, though I don't think anything would have come of it. Then at least we could have cleared the air and either stayed friends or gone our separate ways.
that you are not attracted to him, he will appreciate your honesty
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Don't be **** teaser. Tell him
