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Old 01-23-2015, 06:28 PM
 
Location: Naptowne, Alaska
15,603 posts, read 39,823,601 times
Reputation: 14890

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Any one of us could die at any given moment in our lives. Regardless of age. There are a million ways lives come to an end. Young people get sick, get injured, die...just as much as older people. An older man married to a younger woman is no guarantee she will have to care for him. It could very easily be the other way around. Claiming a younger woman will have to care for her older guy is nothing more than a flat out stupid remark.
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Old 01-23-2015, 06:30 PM
 
Location: Naptowne, Alaska
15,603 posts, read 39,823,601 times
Reputation: 14890
Quote:
Originally Posted by newdixiegirl View Post
in the minds of some men, that's all that matters: that HE has fun. The question is, did SHE continue to have fun? Because I can tell you as someone who was married to someone 12 years my senior, I didn't.
You'll have this no matter what a mans age. A 12 year age difference is nothing.
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Old 01-23-2015, 07:43 PM
 
Location: Nashville, TN -
9,588 posts, read 5,839,694 times
Reputation: 11116
Quote:
Originally Posted by Rance View Post
You'll have this no matter what a mans age. A 12 year age difference is nothing.
It wasn't "nothing" in my marriage. It magnified issues that, yes, probably would have existed regardless.

I honestly believe that had I been closer in age to my husband, he would have respected me more and tried to control me less. I have no doubt that he dated and married me, a young woman in her early 20s at the time, because he knew a woman his own age would have better seen his shortcomings and questioned him on them.

I don't think that control is an issue in all or even most relationships with a significant age difference, but it is in MANY of them.
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Old 01-23-2015, 07:48 PM
 
Location: Nashville, TN -
9,588 posts, read 5,839,694 times
Reputation: 11116
Quote:
Originally Posted by Rance View Post
Any one of us could die at any given moment in our lives. Regardless of age. There are a million ways lives come to an end. Young people get sick, get injured, die...just as much as older people. An older man married to a younger woman is no guarantee she will have to care for him. It could very easily be the other way around. Claiming a younger woman will have to care for her older guy is nothing more than a flat out stupid remark.
Who on this thread made that "remark"? I haven't read any posts discussing that, and I, for one, wasn't even thinking about that when I wrote my posts.
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Old 01-24-2015, 12:18 AM
 
Location: Naptowne, Alaska
15,603 posts, read 39,823,601 times
Reputation: 14890
Quote:
Originally Posted by newdixiegirl View Post
Who on this thread made that "remark"? I haven't read any posts discussing that, and I, for one, wasn't even thinking about that when I wrote my posts.
Nobody did. Why does have to be about "you"?
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Old 01-24-2015, 04:30 AM
 
Location: Nashville, TN -
9,588 posts, read 5,839,694 times
Reputation: 11116
Quote:
Originally Posted by Rance View Post
Nobody did. Why does have to be about "you"?
I wasn't making it about me. I simply didn't know if your were responding to something you "read" in my post or in someone else's. No one mentioned older men dying long before their younger wives, so it's unclear as to what "stupid remark" you were you referring to. Looking for clarification, is all.

Chill, dude.
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Old 01-24-2015, 07:32 AM
 
27,957 posts, read 39,771,359 times
Reputation: 26197
So, 36 is old? Or at least older? Guess I'm no longer a kid. So this is what middle age feels like?
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Old 01-24-2015, 09:19 AM
 
11,768 posts, read 10,260,372 times
Reputation: 3444
Quote:
Originally Posted by AnthonyJ34 View Post
Ohhhhh, I bet your father had fun!!! Lol.
I would imagine so since they are still married.

Quote:
Originally Posted by newdixiegirl View Post
Yeah, and in the minds of some men, that's all that matters: that HE has fun. The question is, did SHE continue to have fun? Because I can tell you as someone who was married to someone 12 years my senior, I didn't.

I'm serious when I say this: if a man isn't prepared to remain active and engaged with the some of the same interests as his significantly younger wife, and to try to keep up with her energy level, as well as keep himself fit and youthful, then he has NO business marrying a younger woman. To do so is only selfishness on his part. It's all about what HE wants and feels he needs, not about her long-term desires or needs.
Well, if she wasn't having fun or at least happy she could easily have left him. She worked for the most part, so in addition to getting some of his money she would also of had a way to support herself as well. Men marrying younger is pretty common where she comes from though. My G-grandfather married a 20 or 30 yr old when he was at least 50. In this situation we are only talking about 12 years.

Quote:
Originally Posted by Raena77 View Post
Alright I'll give you that.But 18 and 36? Uh eww.

I'm 37 and wouldn't look at an 18 year old.My child is only a few years younger than that.It's sick in my opinion.
Sure, why not? I'll probably be interested in 18 yr olds when I'm 30, 40, 50, and even 60. They may not be interested in me at that point, but I doubt I will cease to find them attractive.
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Old 01-24-2015, 09:24 AM
 
3,349 posts, read 2,847,183 times
Reputation: 2258
I think op was troll because she has not come back
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Old 01-24-2015, 12:42 PM
 
2,209 posts, read 2,317,239 times
Reputation: 3428
Quote:
Originally Posted by newdixiegirl View Post
Yeah, and in the minds of some men, that's all that matters: that HE has fun. The question is, did SHE continue to have fun? Because I can tell you as someone who was married to someone 12 years my senior, I didn't.

I'm serious when I say this: if a man isn't prepared to remain active and engaged with the some of the same interests as his significantly younger wife, and to try to keep up with her energy level, as well as keep himself fit and youthful, then he has NO business marrying a younger woman. To do so is only selfishness on his part. It's all about what HE wants and feels he needs, not about her long-term desires or needs.
Well, her parents got married so they obviously liked each other enough to make it official. They obviously thought the other was worthy enough to wed. Whether or not they had a happy marriage or continue to have one I don't know. And you seem to be making general assumptions about older men-younger women relationships based on your individual experiences with an older husband. Your experiences are not necessarily the norm. And you say an older guy has to work hard to stay young, energetic, in-shape, etc, so what does the younger girl have to do? Simply just be young?
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