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Contrary to popular belief, some of us actually like it when you get into it. Some of us like a little more than just staring at a naked body lying there. Get into it, get a little raunchy, take initiative, be vocal.
Best I ever had was with a petite Muslim girl (go figure) who got really into it and took initiative. Worst I had was with 20-somethings who were "wild and crazy" in everyday life, but were a complete bore in the sack (fairly quiet, just lied there).
Define angry. Would you consider it anger if you turn me down I choose not to be friends with you and move on? A lot of women consider that to be a dastardly sin.
The reason this is a problem is that when you do this, you reveal to the woman in question that you never wanted to be her friend in the first place. That the friendship was a lie, it was just a play in a game. If it's not going to pay off in a score, you don't want it.
That's why the "friend zone" is a bit offensive to women, too. We value our friendships, with men and/or women, and we like to think that our friendship is valuable. And unless we are also just looking for a casual hookup (which some women in some circumstances actually do and are!) we'd rather not feel like you view us as life support for the bits you like the best.
OK, female here obviously.
This one is for guys who are in relationships, and those who will find themselves there one day...
She appears tense or upset. You ask what is wrong. She says, "Nothing."
While you may have an instinct to push until you get an answer so you can demolish the problem somehow, please don't do that.
Your best way to handle this is to say in a light voice, "Ok. Love you!" and walk away but stay available. Like in the next room, in the house, not utterly engaged or unreachable, for a few minutes. This way if she decides she does need to air something, you're there.
But odds are good...really good...that when she said that, what she meant is, "It's too petty to trouble you with." And that is the truth. She might be annoyed about some really insignificant thing, something dumb. And she knows it's dumb. She also knows that if you let her, she can get over it pretty quickly. But if you push, you will probably start a fight.
So "nothing" means back off and leave it alone. Odds are it's not a big deal whatever it is.
Honestly, reading this thread reminds me of why I think it's so important to find out about the individual that you are involved with and not the gender. So, what I would like both genders to know is that if you make assumptions about someone because of their gender, you might be discounting who they actually are as a person. Yes, women tend to be more emotional and men tend to be more logical - but that is so varied from person to person and there are also many emotional men and many more logical women. Get to know the person. Get to know what they like, who they are, what they react to, etc. That's more important than anything based on their gender.
The reason this is a problem is that when you do this, you reveal to the woman in question that you never wanted to be her friend in the first place. That the friendship was a lie, it was just a play in a game. If it's not going to pay off in a score, you don't want it.
That's why the "friend zone" is a bit offensive to women, too. We value our friendships, with men and/or women, and we like to think that our friendship is valuable.
What if the guy wanted the "friendship-relationship package" only, particularly considering his 'friend slots' are full?
After all, one only has so much time and energy to maintain his existing friendships...he can either reduce his time spent with other friends and family to take on a new "friend only" relationship, or use that time to find another female who can provide him with the "friendship-relationship package" he was initially looking for.
I want to tell men that not all women are alike or are like whatever assumptions/cliches you may have about women as a whole. We are unique individuals and just as individual with varying tastes, desires, experiences, temperaments, personalities, etc and are just as different from each other as you are from other men.
That said, I know you can say the same about women who do the same about men, but the thread didn't ask me that.
Huh? Ok then.
I think mind reading is the worse.
The next is saying crap you don't mean. Like, "Sure, this place is fine. ( even thou I hate Mexican food )"
Be yourself. If you don't like stuff then say it. Don't be bubbly happy when you are not. I can live with level smiley if that is you. Don't scare me 3 month from now acting all mean and nasty when your outer mask cracks open.
If you don't like that music then say so. That food isn't your favorite? Cool lets go somewhere else.
Don't whine cause I want to go play pool with my buddies for the night when we just went out together. Get over your pouting and find something to do and say have fun.
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Re: Sex
