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Sometimes I wonder if I was born in the wrong decade. I absolutely love traditional men. What's so bad about buying her flowers, carrying her heavy bags, protecting her from the dangers around her, treating her with complete respect, helping her become a better woman?
There are plenty of men out their who would be more "traditional" given the chance. The problem goes both ways.
the disconnect is symbiotic, not one way. You have a generation crying for independence one second while asking to be coddled in the next breath.
The 2 are not mutually exclusive. I have independence and my husband is protective, and vice versa.
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There are plenty of men out their who would be more "traditional" given the chance. The problem goes both ways.
the disconnect is symbiotic, not one way. You have a generation crying for independence one second while asking to be coddled in the next breath.
I'm a 5'2 with a petite frame. I don't think it's asking too much for me to expect my big strong 190 lb husband to be watchful over me. It has nothing to do with independence or tradition, it is simply wanting to be kept safe by someone I love and who loves me. If you have a gf you should naturally want to be protective of her. My husband is protective of me the same way that i am protective of our daughter. Why must wanting to be safe mean that i want to surrender my rights as human being and go back to 'tradition'? Your date wanting you to walk her to her car on a dark night doesn't mean she wants to be 'coddled'.
Last edited by BrowningPoeFrost; 04-17-2015 at 04:05 PM..
I'm fiercely independent (to the point I'm the one that handles the drills and tools in the house) and my hubby is still protective of me. For instance last week I went to the basement to get the laundry and he came with me because we have had some questionable people in our building lately.
It may be a deal breaker for some, but it is a trait that is definitely appreciated. As long as the protectiveness doesn't go overboard into controlling, it is something that is desired by many women.
I am saying you have a generation of hypocrites who want what they want when they want it but will never give back in order to have a healthy symbiotic relationship
Realtionships are always symbiotic in nature. They fail when they are not.
You get back what you give.
It's neither male or female "issue" it's one feeding off the other.
I'm a 5'2 with a petite frame. I don't think it's asking too much for me to expect my big strong 190 lb husband to be watchful over me. It has nothing to do with independence or tradition, it is simply wanting to be kept safe by someone I love and who loves me. If you have a gf you should naturally want to be protective of her. My husband is protective of me the same way that i am protective of our daughter. Why must wanting to be safe mean that i want to surrender my rights as human being and go back to 'tradition'? Your date wanting you to walk her to her car on a dark night doesn't mean she wants to be 'coddled'.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Miss J 74
I'm fiercely independent (to the point I'm the one that handles the drills and tools in the house) and my hubby is still protective of me. For instance last week I went to the basement to get the laundry and he came with me because we have had some questionable people in our building lately.
It may be a deal breaker for some, but it is a trait that is definitely appreciated. As long as the protectiveness doesn't go overboard into controlling, it is something that is desired by many women.
Have to agree with both of these. We don't live in the wilderness, and aren't cave people. But sometimes, being with a good man, who cares enough to want to protect you is the thing. It's reassuring, and shows he values you. But again, provided he's not controlling.
It's really a case of being a team. You want a partner who can have your back. But by that same token, you need to have their back as well. Can be in the same way, or different ways, but still watching out for one another.
I think it's understandable to want a partner you feel will help and watch out for you when things get bad. Unlike being with a partner who will throw you under a bus, or run off and leave you when things get bad.
It's really a case of being a team. You want a partner who can have your back. But by that same token, you need to have their back as well. Can be in the same way, or different ways, but still watching out for one another.
This is the simple version of what I was saying.
spefically how some people conduct themsleves towards the opposate sex and then feel entitled to being treated a specific way.
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