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You are certainly entitled to your opinion. As a mother, I see things differently. I'm in a different world than you are. It's not a big deal to me. I see this as a no win situation for women in terms of how society is going to view them - but a win-win situation for women personally as long as they make the right decision for themselves and their families. You might not notice the numerous posts on here about stay at home moms being lazy, being martyrs (to quote you), having the easy life while their husbands work themselves to death, etc. - but I do. I also notice the posts about working moms not caring about their children and their families. Personally, our family is really happy and I'm really happy with the decisions we have made - so these comments don't affect how I view my life.
And of course, that's what it boils down to. I'm very aware that my opinion is an unpopular one on this topic, that's why I wanted to contend any idea that's it's a majority opinion. Sure, I see posts like mine (and stronger), but for everyone one of those, I see MANY of the opposite. I wouldn't summarize it as a "no win situation in terms of how society views them", because, much as I should be (lol), my opinion doesn't reflect society's. It should be even less important to people who are satisfied with their lives.
How many SAHM's really stay home because they are lazy and don't want to work? I don't know any. I dislike debating this issue because it's such a personal decision and it's not for anyone else to judge. This is one of those rare issues where I can really see every side. I totally understand wanting to stay home with the kids and I totally understand a woman who enjoys her career and doesn't want to give it up. Neither one is wrong. I really feel for women who want to stay home with their kids and can't because of finances.
I don't have kids yet, so I don't know what my preference will be if I do. I'll just try to do whatever is best for my family. Raising kids in today's world is tough enough without all the judging one another.
How many SAHM's really stay home because they are lazy and don't want to work? I don't know any. I dislike debating this issue because it's such a personal decision and it's not for anyone else to judge. This is one of those rare issues where I can really see every side. I totally understand wanting to stay home with the kids and I totally understand a woman who enjoys her career and doesn't want to give it up. Neither one is wrong. I really feel for women who want to stay home with their kids and can't because of finances.
I don't have kids yet, so I don't know what my preference will be if I do. I'll just try to do whatever is best for my family. Raising kids in today's world is tough enough without all the judging one another.
Most average everyday working class people don't have the luxury of having one spouse stay home and just do nothing, I mean even if you don't have kids, you still need to tend to the basics of everyday living, cooking, cleaning, laundry, etc etc etc.
I agree, things are tough enough in this world, we shouldn't be adding more to it by dumping on each other.
I posted earlier that I prefer for family to raise kids to try and avoid daycare, that is the one thing that was probably a good thing about having in-laws live with you, in the old days grandma and grandpa helped out with looking after kids and things of that nature.
As much as I think my MIL is a good woman the thought of having her living with us sends chills down my spine....
Same goes for my dad, my dad is probably worse than the MIL.....
It depends on where you live and who is the breadwinner in the household. If your husband makes significantly more than the wife, then wife not working is totally fine. However, if you make equal or more than your husband, that's really not a sound decision. Also, depending on where you live, being away from the workforce until your kid starts school means all the prior years of experience is moot. Being away for that many years brings you right back to entry level. So it really is something to consider if you do plan on going back to work.
I don't get why the marriage defenders around here need to shout "NUH UH" every time someone brings up the 50% divorce rate.
Fact is, the divorce rate is only as low as it is because of the elderly who have been married since a time when divorce was heavily looked down upon.
When you examine divorce rate for marriages consisting of people who are 50 today and younger, the divorce rate is something like 75%.
If you want to call something a fact - you might want to be able to back it up.
I'm not a "marriage defender" or anything. I'm happily married and would still be happily married even if the divorce rate was 99%. I just don't understand why people like to always say that the divorce rate is much higher than it actually is.
[quote=Dewdroplet76;38839276]If you want to call something a fact - you might want to be able to back it up.
I'm not a "marriage defender" or anything. I'm happily married and would still be happily married even if the divorce rate was 99%. I just don't understand why people like to always say that the divorce rate is much higher than it actually is.[/quote]
Similarly, I don't understand why people want to say it's not 50%, when it is or thereabouts.
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