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I don't see why people are accusing him of just wanting sex. It is not normal for a girlfriend and boyfriend to go that long without intimacy unless there are medical reasons or there is a distance between them. Fifteen minutes away is NOT a long distance.
OP, it sounds like you just aren't compatible. I'm sorry to say, but I think it is time to move on.
Even if she does have a low sex drive/doesnt care about sex that much, i would expect some effort from her to make things work. i told her i cant go on like this forever. She is aware of my needs i was sincere about it several times. if i were in her shoes i would make some effort to satisfy her needs regardless of my sex drive. because i care for her, looks like she doesnt care about mine.
It's not just the lack of sex. But the lack of it makes a man feel unloved,unwanted, unappreciated and unrespected.
Even if she does have a low sex drive/doesnt care about sex that much, i would expect some effort from her to make things work. i told her i cant go on like this forever. She is aware of my needs i was sincere about it several times. if i were in her shoes i would make some effort to satisfy her needs regardless of my sex drive. because i care for her, looks like she doesnt care about mine.
It's not just the lack of sex. But the lack of it makes a man feel unloved,unwanted, unappreciated and unrespected.
We have been together for a year. We are both 28 now. So we had our one year anniversary on Wednesday. We dont have regular sex (we live apart 15 minutes (driving) - she lives at home and she rarely came to my place where we can have sex even tho i invite her quite often she came only once a month - we dont have sex for 4,5,6 or even more weeks in a row. its always been like this since beginning. Im reading my diary - we had sex 4 times in first 5 months, 6 times in first 6 months... its my firs serious relationship but i cant go on like this forever...
Around 6 months in relationship she was eager to have sex with me, she was inviting herself (I was happy), but then that stopped pretty soon. She is very eager to see me, caring and affectionate towards me. but sexual relationship... i dont know what to think... i feel she is more of a friend to me then a girlfriend.
I talked to her about it 3 times but nothing ever changes. We have agreement how to solve that problem - me sleeping over at her place at Fridays or Saturdays and she can came at my place anytime she wants for last 2 months (i have my own place now). the thing is she always has an excuse when i invite myself to sleep over at her place, and she has not invited my to sleep over at her place for at least 3 months... i dont know what to do... We have sex soon after argument and then the dry spell/cycle continue. What bothers me even more is that she never said anything about lack of sex. it like 6 weeks went by with no sex and she just doesnt care!). I get more and more resentful after every passing week without sex and that effects our relationship. i told her sex once a month is just not enough for me and it means a lot to me but she just doest put any effort to change things. I constantly feel unwanted and unloved.
So on Wednesday we went to a dinner and during dinner i suggested/invited her to come to my place on Saturday, but she declined invitation, because her best friend came back from holidays - she was gone for 14 days, and my gf rather wait for her at home to have a drink with her than come to my place and make some love. To think about it, things like this happened several times - that friends or some other stuff were priority over me. .
She also gave me nothing for our anniversary even tho she was constantly counting how many months/weeks/days are still missing till one year together, so i thought its a big deal to her. the fact i didnt get anything dont even bother me as much as the sexual thing... Am i wrong to being hurt?!? Dowes she has low sex drive? Are we sexually incompatible?
I hope to read some opinions. TNX
What is it about any of the bolded that makes you think you are in a relationship?
After we started having sex and she never orgasmed, i said id like to give her one and she should tell me what should i do to please her... She said dont worry, that she has never had an orgasm with any boyfriend and that it is OK. its like she doesnt even care to try/say it...
I asked her if she achieved orgasms by masturbating and she said yes... Maybe thats the reason. After that i was watching/noticing her during sex more closely and all i can say from her body responses and facial expressions is that she likes it/enjoys it... but clearly not enough...
" After we started having sex and she never orgasmed " I could always bring my girlfriend to have multi sarcasms.
i dont really understand the point of this thread or what the OP is looking for us to do/ tell him. It obviously isn't working out, so break up with her. We cant tell her to have sex with u. If you've tried, then no answer on this board is going to convince her otherwise.
She also gave me nothing for our anniversary even tho she was constantly counting how many months/weeks/days are still missing till one year together, so i thought its a big deal to her. the fact i didnt get anything dont even bother me as much as the sexual thing... Am i wrong to being hurt?!? Dowes she has low sex drive? Are we sexually incompatible?
I missed this, about the anniversary present. That's pretty shabby.
OP, she's either not that into you, or she's selfish. Was the anniversary pretty much all about her? You should have said something. "Gee, after all that buildup, I assumed we'd be exchanging gifts. You know, reciprocally. To show how much we care about each other. Reciprocally. Because relationships are about reciprocity."
You can do better than this, OP. And yes, you two are sexually incompatible. And my guess is that there are other incompatibilities you're either ignoring, or haven't discovered yet. Move on to greener pastures. It may take you awhile to find someone you get along with, but it's not worth staying in this friendship, or whatever it is. It's not meeting your needs. It never will. Face it.
then tell my why there were almost non - existing sex from the beginning of relationship when attraction is the strongest?? 4 times in first 5 months? And why should be the man always the one who do everything - from beginning till the end. For relationship to work there needs to be 2 people to make some effort...
btw tnx for putting extra salt on my wounds...
Men initiate and women react to that initiation. A relationship rests on the males shoulders, if he does nothing she does nothing. Why? Because women are not, what's the word... Predators/pursuers/dominant.
The "it takes two people to make a relationship work" saying is complete rubbish.
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What is wrong?
