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Okay chill. i don't think my text was needy at all, it was super friendly and appropriate in my opinion. Whatever, we don't know what his agenda is. He could not want to date right now, or he could not be really that intrested. I don't think he's an *******, I think he just doesn't really care about dating and wants an easy lay. It's his life. In my opinion I did everything I can do.
Needy is not the right word. Desperate was more fitting. Girls do not say the "hey if you want lets hangout etc etc". Guys do that.
I am not sure this dude just wanted an easy lay. He didn't even attempt to bang you on his bed making out.
I mean, there isnt a more appropriate time than that.
Okay chill. I don't think my text was needy at all, it was super friendly and appropriate in my opinion. Ive been showing minimal intrest as well. Whatever, we don't know what his agenda is. He could not want to date right now, or he could not be really that intrested. I don't think he's an *******, I think he just doesn't really care about dating and wants an easy lay. It's his life. In my opinion I did everything I can do.
And more.
He didn't take you on a proper date, you went to his place and laid around on the bed right after meeting him, and now he's showing that he's not actually into you by being intentionally vague and evasive.
Time to move on and learn from your mistakes. You went from virgin to being open to indiscriminate hook-ups. RE-evaluate your standards and hold out for the sake of your self-esteem.
He didn't take you on a proper date, you went to his place and laid around on the bed right after meeting him, and now he's showing that he's not actually into you by being intentionally vague and evasive.
Time to move on and learn from your mistakes. You went from virgin to being open to indiscriminate hook-ups. RE-evaluate your standards and hold out for the sake of your self-esteem.
Also, therapy!
Indiscriminate hookups? What the? I don't see how my behavior was so outlandish! This is insane to me that people on this thread stick up for this shady guy who was the one who thought his apartment was a good place for a first date. It wasn't my idea!
If he's such a gentleman he would have taken me out to dinner. Don't belittle me and me feel foolish. Everyone can hop off.
And if you mention one more time that I need therapy I'm reporting you or asking you to be banned. It's extremely insulting and you do not know anything about my personal life. It's downright rude and I think you're a coward for hiding behind a computer screen and saying these things to people.
Indiscriminate hookups? What the? I don't see how my behavior was so outlandish! This is insane to me that people on this thread stick up for this shady guy who was the one who thought his apartment was a good place for a first date. It wasn't my idea!
If he's such a gentleman he would have taken me out to dinner. Don't belittle me and me feel foolish. Everyone can hop off.
And if you mention one more time that I need therapy I'm reporting you or asking you to be banned. It's extremely insulting and you do not know anything about my personal life. It's downright rude and I think you're a coward for hiding behind a computer screen and saying these things to people.
Again, why did you allow yourself to even go back to his place on the first date?
I am perplexed by the whole scenario. He invited you back to his place, you all made out and he never progressed past that. There is a missing piece of the puzzle here somewhere, or he didn't like what he saw / felt / smelled / whatever at some point and stopped.
I can honestly say, that if I invited someone up to my place, I would be making the moves, all the way. It's one thing for you to say no, fine, but I would be initiating. I would not invite you up if I didn't want that.
Well, there is one scenario I would stop, but i guess this is PG rated
Indiscriminate hookups? What the? I don't see how my behavior was so outlandish! This is insane to me that people on this thread stick up for this shady guy who was the one who thought his apartment was a good place for a first date. It wasn't my idea!
If he's such a gentleman he would have taken me out to dinner. Don't belittle me and me feel foolish. Everyone can hop off.
And if you mention one more time that I need therapy I'm reporting you or asking you to be banned. It's extremely insulting and you do not know anything about my personal life. It's downright rude and I think you're a coward for hiding behind a computer screen and saying these things to people.
You should also know that a lot of people on this website have holier than thou attitudes so take what they say with a grain of salt.
From another "attractive woman in her 20s" let me just say that there are a lot of douchey guys out there. Protect yourself by taking it slow and judging a guy by his actions and not his words.
And no you don't need therapy...just use caution.
Again, why did you allow yourself to even go back to his place on the first date?
I am perplexed by the whole scenario. He invited you back to his place, you all made out and he never progressed past that. There is a missing piece of the puzzle here somewhere, or he didn't like what he saw / felt / smelled / whatever at some point and stopped.
I can honestly say, that if I invited someone up to my place, I would be making the moves, all the way. It's one thing for you to say no, fine, but I would be initiating. I would not invite you up if I didn't want that.
Well, there is one scenario I would stop, but i guess this is PG rated
Yeah I guess it is a little strange. No, I don't smell lol. He just didn't go past touching me over my clothes idk. I think he honestly got the sense I was a nice person and didn't want to push it. Maybe he would have felt awkward when I said no? I really don't put off the **** vibe at all regardless of me going to his apartment. I'm like bubbly and sweet and dorky I don't fit that image. And like I said, he knows my brother so I think that had a big part of it.
You should also know that a lot of people on this website have holier than thou attitudes so take what they say with a grain of salt.
From another "attractive woman in her 20s" let me just say that there are a lot of douchey guys out there. Protect yourself by taking it slow and judging a guy by his actions and not his words.
And no you don't need therapy...just use caution.
Yeah they really are. It's like, calm down people. I go to college. I know what bad girls do. I know what goes on between people on first encounters. I've heard everything, and yes my behavior was forward but I'm getting insulted on here as if we danced around naked or something.
Yeah they really are. It's like, calm down people. I go to college. I know what bad girls do. I know what goes on between people on first encounters. I've heard everything, and yes my behavior was forward but I'm getting insulted on here as if we danced around naked or something.
You get those comments because you act as if you have no control over what happens to you.
You KNEW that going back to his place was not a proper date and yet ... you still went.
You DO need serious emotional guidance from a pro. Your reactions in this forum are all over the place, and your approach to sex has swung like a pendulum from the first time you posted.
So you didn't dance around naked, but you admitted earlier that you would have had he pushed it. So YOU calm down and figure out what the hell you're doing before you get in the car with another dude.
You get those comments because you act as if you have no control over what happens to you.
You KNEW that going back to his place was not a proper date and yet ... you still went.
You DO need serious emotional guidance from a pro. Your reactions in this forum are all over the place, and your approach to sex has swung like a pendulum from the first time you posted.
So you didn't dance around naked, but you admitted earlier that you would have had he pushed it. So YOU calm down and figure out what the hell you're doing before you get in the car with another dude.
Even Rose agrees with me on that one.
Have to agree here. OP, thing is, nowadays, very few guys are going to be gentlemanly right off the bat. They'll push boundaries to see what they can get away with.
You don't need to be a nun. But you have to command respect, it's rarely just given. When a guy 1st meets you, he knows nothing about you, and thus far, you're not anything too special to him yet. That takes time.
Next time, if it's a 1st date, and a guy wants to try and get you to his house, decline with "I am sorry, but that's a bit fast for a 1st date." Short, sweet, and to the point, and it lets him know, you aren't going to be moving fast and jumping into bed with him. Ask for a real date, earlier on in the day. Then in the future, avoid dates past 9:00.pm As my mother jokingly stated, that late at night, only thing that may be open is someone's legs. Not saying yours' were. But as you said, it was late, and there weren't too many places to go. So avoid that. With many guys, when they wanna hang out with girls late at night, they're testing the waters for easy sex.
So when you go along with an idea, and think you're just being nice, that comes of as doormat-ish or naive. Don't just go along with an idea just to be nice. Because if something bad happens, you're just as guilty because you went along with it, but could have chosen not to.
So since you have become sexually active, and gone through the drama with the 1st guy, it seems your behavior has gotten more forward to the point of reckless, or possibly naive / oblivious.
I like women who dump me after 1 month of dating. See, it goes both ways.
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