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I've been feeling pretty depressed about my dating life lately.. I'm 23 and it's been about a year since I graduated. I had a girlfriend during my last couple years of college, but since then I haven't really even had a date other than one girl I met on tinder (It didn't go well).
I've met a couple girls recently at parties or through friends, and felt like I got along with them well in a group. But when I try to talk to them through facebook later on to see if they want to hang out they are never enthusiastic about talking to me and I can pretty much tell they're not interested.
When I first started talking to my ex I could tell right away she was into me, and I don't think I've gotten that feeling from any girls since.
I'm in not ugly, am in decent shape, and have a good job.. I just don't get what I'm doing wrong..
I've been feeling pretty depressed about my dating life lately.. I'm 23 and it's been about a year since I graduated. I had a girlfriend during my last couple years of college, but since then I haven't really even had a date other than one girl I met on tinder (It didn't go well).
I've met a couple girls recently at parties or through friends, and felt like I got along with them well in a group. But when I try to talk to them through facebook later on to see if they want to hang out they are never enthusiastic about talking to me and I can pretty much tell they're not interested.
When I first started talking to my ex I could tell right away she was into me, and I don't think I've gotten that feeling from any girls since.
I'm in not ugly, am in decent shape, and have a good job.. I just don't get what I'm doing wrong..
Location: RI, MA, VT, WI, IL, CA, IN (that one sucked), KY
41,936 posts, read 36,974,024 times
Reputation: 40635
They may turn soon, or in 10 years, you'll still be young either way. Chill out. Go to parties. See bands. Hang out, do cool things, be cool, things will happen. I really can't recall having any dates at 21-24 or so, things like hook ups sometimes happened though. Don't sweat it.
Chill bro. Your 23, and have had a couple rejections following a longer relationship that fizzled.
Maybe the rejections is a knock to the ego, but honestly, it is no big deal.
Take a little break from worrying about dating, and just enjoy the normal friends and hobbies your involved with. Relax, do not think about dating, etc.
Then, when your in a better mindset, have your confidence back, get into dating. I hate cliche's like "it's a numbers game" but in the end, your not going to have great mutual attraction and chemistry with every woman you approach. However, eventually, you will have an attraction that is reciprocated.
You're giving up because a couple of girls weren't into you? You realize that most women won't be into you, right? (Think of all the women who crossed your path in college that you weren't into. It works both ways.) That's the way the odds work for most people. Keep putting yourself out there, and find new ways to do that. Join a co-ed sports league or a hiking group, take a theater improv class or a photog class, check out some enviro or political action orgs to volunteer for, or volunteer for the local annual film festival. Follow your hobbies and interests to meet new people. Chat women up when you go to concerts and other events.
Thanks guys your posts make me feel a lot better, I guess I just freaked out there for a little bit. I think I just need to chill out for awhile, do things I want to do, and not worry about girls too much. Like others said, I'm sure I'll naturally end up meeting people if I just follow my interests and be social.
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