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Location: Los Angeles (Hancock Park), California USA
90 posts, read 89,201 times
Reputation: 110
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Quote:
Originally Posted by NewbiePoster
That's the standard protocol, though. Have a plan for the first date. Except it's shifting due to the OLD medium. People play it more casual on OLD, since meeting for coffee to scope each other out and make sure the other person's real is the new standard deal. The OP got caught in the paradigm shift, it sounds like.
Well this wasn't a "first date," but a first meeting. Both are very different. A first meeting is usually quick to vet physical chemistry and should be informal, simple and on a even playing field.
I got a plan: she can come over to my place, I'll cook, and after we eat, we can hit it all night.
Or....I could ask what she would like to do (since I have not yet mastered the elusive art of reading a woman's mind) so I can make a suggestion/s.
I feel for some of you folks who struggle with something as elementary as meeting up on a date ; less sophisticated animals on this earth have no problems courting. Lol.
Well this wasn't a "first date," but a first meeting. Both are very different. A first meeting is usually quick to vet physical chemistry and should be informal, simple and on a even playing field.
This is what I'm talking about, exactly. So, he didn't see it as a date, just a meet, greet, and scope out. She took it as a date. Caught in the paradigm shift. Blame OLD.
A lot of women seem to feel that dating is about the man making everything as easy as possible for the women..
Initiate so the women's feelings and ego isn't hurt..make all the decisions on where to go so she doesn't have that pressure..then if the man doesn't do all this they complain about it on a message board because it forces them to have to make an effort early on as well..
Talk about entitlement..
Excuse me...most of us (sane) women aren't like that.
When guys decide where to go, what time to meet, what time to finish the date, what day of the week, what to eat, etc. They are controlling and should be avoided. If they nicely ask for input and suggestions then they are seen as weak and un-manly. Come on girls, make up your minds.
Oh puuleeeeez.
As if THIS chick in ANY way represents the majority of other girls.
As if THIS chick in ANY way represents the majority of other girls.
Have to agree. What the OP is upset about, I wouldn't have given any thought to, and I am very neurotic and over think things. But I saw nothing wrong in what her guy did. I thought she overreacted a bit. But she has her personal taste, as all men and women do. She lost interest in that guy. But other women may not.
That's the standard protocol, though. Have a plan for the first date. Except it's shifting due to the OLD medium. People play it more casual on OLD, since meeting for coffee to scope each other out and make sure the other person's real is the new standard deal. The OP got caught in the paradigm shift, it sounds like.
Oh baloney. This was a first MEETING, not a "date". Anyone that spends ANY time using OLD knows better. It's not "playing casual", it's simply meeting each other. No game. No mystery. Very very simple.
She posted the conversation she had with him earlier in the thread:
Her issue is the conversation didn't go like this:
Him: Would you like to meet tonight at 7:00 for coffee at Little Coffee Shop at 123 Main Street?
Her: That would be fine but I don't drink coffee after 2 p.m.
Him: Oh, okay. How about we meet at 7:00 at Hoity Toity Wine Bar at the end of the jetty instead?
They could probably go have croc burgers & beers over at Dundee's Place.....
Oh baloney. This was a first MEETING, not a "date". Anyone that spends ANY time using OLD knows better. It's not "playing casual", it's simply meeting each other. No game. No mystery. Very very simple.
I didn't mean it was a game. All I was saying is that the protocol is different on OLD than in old-fashioned IRL dating. You have a point, though, that an experienced OLD dater should know that.
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; less sophisticated animals on this earth have no problems courting. Lol.
