Quote:
Originally Posted by thatgirl10000
My boyfriend and I have been going out since late last year, but we didn't really start dating until January of this year, and we only became officially boyfriend and girlfriend last month. The thing is, I am struggling financially. I have a full-time job and a part-time one, but I am heavily in debt. With a poor credit score. He, on the other hand, has his **** together and has a great credit score. I am NOT planning to ask for help. Hell, no! That is not the intent of my disclosure. But two people are in a relationship to see if there's any future, and I'm beginning to think that it would only be fair to him to know what my financial state is. So he can decide at this point if he wants to continue this, or if it's a red flag for him and he should pursue somebody else.
Is it too soon? Or is it only fair that I disclose it this early? We haven't had real talks about the future yet, being that we've only been official for a month, but he has mentioned just in passing that we may have to talk about marriage someday, but not yet.
I'm afraid to lose him. �� But I can't be selfish either. He's a great guy who deserves the best.
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He has mentioned just in passing about the prospects of marriage, does not equate to your having to feel guilty about not disclosing your financial situation.
It's not like you are mooching off of the system and don't hold a job, and aren't proactively looking for ways out of your own debt.
That is your own personal business for now, because you are only dating and not engaged to be married.
When the time comes, I would disclose with him later on. For now, you still have time to fix your credit score. You still have time to do what you need to do to get back on your own two feet to be that independent woman who can meet him at an equal level. You clearly have your act together. Don't make yourself feel bad. You learned, and you're striving to grow and improve. No rush.
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