Do things bother you less with age? (girl, younger, kid)
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Just the opposite, but i am far more aware of situations that become troubling for me. I used to drive through them in a frenzy, all at once. Now i am more patient, but they pile up more quickly.
Like I use to flip out when my ex husband would not come home for days.
Current bf will go out for the night with his guys and It does not phase me. My only request is to text me and let me know not to expect him.
I think most people in healthy relationships would be upset if their spouse didn't come home for days. Perhaps it isn't that you have lowered your expectations, but that your BF has established you can trust him when he's out with the guys and you just didn't trust your hubby that much.
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Originally Posted by LowonLuck
Interesting. I guess I have just learned to pick my battlesand not stress over stupid stuff.
I would say this is what I have done. My best friend will at times ask why I don't argue or "fight" for my opinion more when we don't agree. I've told him that is because there has yet to be something we don't agree on that truly matters in the grand scheme of things, but should that day come, he better believe I will stand my ground.
I was widowed at 34. It's amazing how many things mattered prior to that that now really aren't that important to me when looking at the overall picture.
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Originally Posted by LowonLuck
I hear differently. I have had some really ****ty things happen to me and on more than one occasionally, including posting here, I have heard that it was my fault.
I dont know how to stop making crappy things happen to me, but somehow I am causing them.
This is a forum made up of random strangers. If you are around long enough, you will figure out who is worth paying attention to and who to take with a grain of salt.
Yeah I am known for calling it like it is and not holding back.
I wouldn't be too proud of that, chiefly because you're not right all the time. It doesn't make one honest. It makes one an a-hole, someone who really gets off on raining on everyone else's parade under the guise of trying to be truthful.
People who claim to be brutally honest are more interest in being brutal than being honest.
I wouldn't be too proud of that, chiefly because you're not right all the time. It doesn't make one honest. It makes one an a-hole, someone who really gets off on raining on everyone else's parade under the guise of trying to be truthful.
People who claim to be brutally honest are more interest in being brutal than being honest.
Agreed. My father is that way. There need to be a balance of give your honest opinion, without being tactless and rude. And sometimes the opinion may not be needed unless asked-provided it's not something serious where you think someone's well-being is at stake.
Like I use to flip out when my ex husband would not come home for days.
Current bf will go out for the night with his guys and It does not phase me. My only request is to text me and let me know not to expect him.
I cant decide if things just no longer bother me or I no longer have any expectations.
Well, going back and reading this, I can read between the lines.
Your very name tells us everything we need to know. Because your screen name implies think your horrid relationships are a matter of luck, rather than a function of the men you choose and the behavior you allow. Unless we're talking about a chronic disease or a natural disaster or a freak accident, you pretty much have the life you've earned by the time you hit 45 or 50.
You get what you tolerate in life. If you put up with your S/Os staying gone for days and not telling you, you're giving them permission to do it a second time. And a third. And on and on. The first time they do it, it's their fault. The second time they do it, it's your fault.
That's not luck, the random workings of the universe. That's a combination of bad choices and not demanding mutual respect in a relationship.
No use flipping out. Didnt change anything except make him hide where he was more.
If my husband did stuff like that.... we would not be married.
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Short answer no. In my teens and early 20s I use to fret over what I'd wear, if I needed to shave, what kinda body spray to wear etc.... Tried to analyze everything both pre and post date.
Now in my mid 30s my date is lucky if I shower or shave haha. My attitude now is if this goes anywhere relationship wise she's gonna see me like this at some point anyways so why not just get it out there. I also don't take the first date very serious anymore like I use to. I treat it more like I'm out with a casual friend than a nerve racking, serious first date that may or may not break the relationship.
I believe that as people age things that were once important are not important any longer probably due to the silliness of those things. Some people may demand good looks or a high income or must drive a certain type of car but as you age you realize how silly these things are and mean very little in the big picture of life.
That isn't to say you will never have disagreements but you come to understand which are important and need to be discussed while others aren't worth the time or effort. Its just part of the process.
Things that use to bother me about men and relationships when I was younger, no longer bother me now.
Is this normal? Do you just grow to care less? Learn to not have any expectations?
Things that bothered me, as a young (er) man , now, I wouldn't spare a another half look. I'm way more willing to wade in and get banged up and dirty for the sake of a relationship now. And just accept that things need doing , and I'm the only one who's got them to do, in certain circumstances.
Yes, age makes a BIG difference in my outlook on things. Wouldn't have it otherwise. Gkmme them dirty jobs and difficult, annoying , angering , what have you, things. I have the wisdom, knowledge and experience to deal with them now. Would that I could have my current brain in my 25 yo body. Lol
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