Cheating married woman who cheated on a lover

[PJ1252]

Originally Posted by Illuminating Thoughts

You're absolutely right and I told her I would have trust issues with her. Her reason in not divorcing right away is because she has a house and joint accounts. However she gets outside encouragment to be single because she has never really dated. She has had two failed marriages so she I'd express to me she wanted to date and not be tied down which were clear red flags for me. Again my loneliness overtook my rational mind.

It happens to the best of us - Good luck to you

[prettygreeneyes]

OH goodness, Illuminating, you sound like an old and tired guy- I was lonely...blah, blah, You are only 33; go out and meet available people, volunteer, join a club, do something. Don't blame your sense of loneliness and your past on this misstep. You went in with your eyes wide open!
What if the husband had found out about you? This could have ended up a lot worse. You play with fire; you get burned. It's simple as that.
Move on. Lesson learned.
Don't get involved with married women. If they cheat with you; they will on you! You live and learn.

[BirdieBelle]

Originally Posted by Illuminating Thoughts

As for the idea that "what did you expect?" Well I didn't expect to be in this situation. I really wasn't looking for this and like I said, we started out as friends and it just happened.

Here's the thing to remember ... it never "just happens."

You had a thousand chances to stop it along the way, but you chose not to.

The first time you knew you were behaving as more than friends ...

The first time one of you made a sexual advance...

The first time you kissed ...

Those all were choices you made. SO THAT is how you ended up in this situation. And I know from experience, as do you, that "these situations" rarely end well. You can't let loneliness drive you to desperation. When someone is willing to overlap their relationship boundaries like this, you cannot really trust them to make other good decisions.

You will inevitably get hurt.

[Bette]

Originally Posted by Illuminating Thoughts

You guys are right. I guess I am looking for some comfort in my own ignorance. Sadly I stayed in this because of companionship. She was a professional woman who took interest in me.

Sadly she said in a conversation that she continued dating me to see if her crush would go away. It is unfortunate that my loneliness has developed a lack of self esteem within myself

Ten years from now, you will look back and know she did you a favor. Just think if her husband had found out and much worse could have happened.

Lesson learned.

To feel less depressed, volunteer. Find something you like doing and volunteer. There is always someone in greater need.

Good luck.

[MrsApt]

this is a troll

[HappyRain]

Originally Posted by Bette

Ten years from now, you will look back and know she did you a favor. Just think if her husband had found out and much worse could have happened.

Lesson learned.

To feel less depressed, volunteer. Find something you like doing and volunteer. There is always someone in greater need.

Good luck.

As someone said, and it's true. If your biggest issue in your life is that you're having trouble with romance, then your life is damn good. Romance is nice, and it's good to have a special someone. And it can be lonely when you don't, but things could be worse. You could be

1. terminally Ill
2. Have a loved one dead, or terminally ill
3. Be in severe debt
4. Homeless
5. In an abusive relationship, and still lonely, but also living in fear
6. Bed-ridden
etc

So sure, it can be saddening that you know about love, and see others experience it but yet you have trouble. But if that's your main trouble, you're lucky.