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If a couple doesn't mind the arrangement then why not?
A stay at home spouse would mean I wouldn't have to go grocery shopping much as well as general household stuff and even mundane things like oil changes and so on and so forth.
My friend and his wife have close to that arrangement and he is happy with it.
I think part of the problem is that not a lot of people live in a modest enough cost of living area or to a spouse with substantial income relative to that living area.
For example, in some parts of the US a 2nd income is critical to being able to afford a home.
If a couple doesn't mind the arrangement then why not?
A stay at home spouse would mean I wouldn't have to go grocery shopping much as well as general household stuff and even mundane things like oil changes and so on and so forth.
My friend and his wife have close to that arrangement and he is happy with it.
I think part of the problem is that not a lot of people live in a modest enough cost of living area or to a spouse with substantial income relative to that living area.
For example, in some parts of the US a 2nd income is critical to being able to afford a home.
I don't think the stay at home spouse in the OP was a house keeper or home tender...didn't sound like she did much of anything that wasn't HER own interests...they probably hired peeps to do ALL the home tending...she just went out and did her thing on HIS dime...I hope she was the holy grail in bed otherwise...er...never mind ive already been called judgemental once
If my wife is home doing all the household stuff, then yeah if I can afford it its golden...then we are a TEAM...the TEAM can decide how its a team, the important part is its a team
the wife in the op was not part of a team, based on the little info given...she was doing her solo sport and he was financing it...
It depends, I mean how much money do you need to spend? Where one lives of course matters etc. My mom is extremely educated and made the choice to stay home with us and I was glad. She barely worked during her life, same with MIL.
if you ask me...staying home with kid(s) and tending house is 10X harder (and more rewarding) than the rat race climbing the corporate ladder career mess...MUCH harder...
I couldn't agree with you more, but you have the majority of mentality of people thinking SAHM sit around eating bon bons all day and watching TV and maybe the ones on welfare that don't care about their kids do that.
I not only did all of my stuff, but all the things my ex should have done as a man, but was too lazy to do.
People quick to judge, perceive themselves as perfect.
I don't know situation of the OP but they are guys who merry very skilled type of women that get all expenses paid. They must be pretty good in bed I guess. She makes a career of living on his dime. Actually one of my aquintances does something similar. She is a nice girl but she admits that she uses her looks and skills to get by. Guys she dates are much less attractive then her and will do anything to keep her. She finished college while married to one guy who paid for everything except school tuition. She worked a little bit every now and then but just to have some money aside. Thn she went to some school trip in Europe and met some guy. She waited about a year to finish school and filed to divorce few weeks later. She then moved to Europe and is living with that guy she met, in his house. Does no chores, just lounging ( her words). She did go to school but I think that ended.
Married people tend to do things together: take care of a house, go on vacations, pets, appointments...Unless you live with a married woman, you have no idea what she does and why she does things the way she does...Not everyone has the same expenses and lifestyle. And one cannot live in another's head.
I think people hate on Stay at Home Wives because people believe money is the key to happiness. But the problem is that once you make enough money to meet your basic needs, no amount of raise will make you any happier. Family, friends, and relationships are what make you happy.
Personally, I want to be a stay at home wife. I spent 11 years in and out of foster care where no one loved me or gave me attention. When I was adopted, the parents were so focused on work and "making just a little more money" (despite each making 70k) that they just forgot about me. I had no one to guide me through the dangers of the world or help me heal from my childhood trauma. I did very risky things like give my address and personal info to strange men online or drive 100 miles per hour at 2 am in the morning down an icy bridge. I was forced to scrounge around for my own food because no one cooked anything. (These parents are now divorced by the way because they were so focused on careers that they forgot about me and their relationship).
I am still struggling to gain confidence, heal from PTSD, and find peace in my life because no one has been there to help me or guide me. My boyfriend of 3 years has been a huge help. He's been so patient, caring, and encouraging. He's the first person that has done this. Thanks to him, I've made great strides and have been seeing a therapist for the past 2 years.
When I have kids, I want to give them a different childhood-a wonderful childhood. I want them to know that I will be here for them; to guide them through the dangers and the wonders of the world; to make sure they always have a meal available to them. I want to give them stability and love.
I nervously talked to my boyfriend about being a stay at home wife and he was surprisingly thrilled at the idea. We discussed how it will give me time to heal, find peace, and connect to others like me through volunteering. I will continue to learn how to navigate through relationships, friendships, my past, and the world. And then, when we have kids, I'll be prepared to teach them what I have learned. I've always been so busy taking care of my own basic needs and my siblings that I've never gotten to know myself. I never got a childhood.
I am still going to finish my degree as it gives me the opportunities to grow as a person, meet others, and discover my passions, but I really want to be a stay at home wife and take care of the chores, housework, cooking, shopping, garden, and eventually children.
A lot of moms with young children who work are stressed out and tired, not just from having to work and raise children but they are also sometimes sad that they feel they're missing out on their kids childhood and early development. Imo a lot of working moms that judge stay at home's are just jealous or bitter, but of course they wouldn't admit that.
Also there's this idea that raising children is somehow easier than going out and working. Not sure why people think this.
It's like people who hate their jobs and struggle with money. They seem to really like to take out their anger about their lives on people wealthier than them. Jealousy. Plain and simple
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