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If you aren't happy in your marriage, talk to your wife about it. Let her know how you are feeling, listen to how she is feeling, see if you can work things out.
Yup. Wife's are only "spoiled" because the husband allows it. If a husband is not going to communicate his unhappiness, he should not complain!
But wait... we just a similar thread (opposite situation) in which the husband should "just know" what needs to be done in the house without being told. That he should simply look around and act on what is obvious.
Now that the tables are turned, it is up to the husband to tell the wife? Shouldn't she "just know" too?
Of course, I don't advocate assuming that one should "just know"; husband nor wife. Communication is the key and I already posted how my wife keep the communication open... However I think it is important just pointing out the slanted bias here. He should communicate to his wife. Similarly, the wife should communicate to the husband if the opposite were true.
This system only works if you didn't marry a lazy, scorekeeping, selfish ahole.
It also didn't work for us... but not because either of us was lazy. It was because what I saw as the priority wasn't always what my wife saw as the priority. We live in an overwhelming work load and as such we also have to coordinate which things fall of the plate or get pushed to the weekend.
So instead of assuming, we simply talked and coordinated. But hey.. if it works it works... that is great.
But wait... we just a similar thread (opposite situation) in which the husband should "just know" what needs to be done in the house without being told. That he should simply look around and act on what is obvious.
Now that the tables are turned, it is up to the husband to tell the wife? Shouldn't she "just know" too?
Of course, I don't advocate assuming that one should "just know"; husband nor wife. Communication is the key and I already posted how my wife keep the communication open... However I think it is important just pointing out the slanted bias here. He should communicate to his wife. Similarly, the wife should communicate to the husband if the opposite were true.
IMe, the most frustrating thing about being in a relationship, is not knowing whats going on in your partners mind. We are not mind readers, and thats why communication is paramount!
Look at all the threads on this relationship board... just about every thread on this sub forum can be solved with simple communication!
I cant for the life of me, understand why communication can be so difficult for so many people? It just boggles my mind
IMe, the most frustrating thing about being in a relationship, is not knowing whats going on in your partners mind. We are not mind readers, and thats why communication is paramount!
Look at all the threads on this relationship board... just about every thread on this sub forum can be solved with simple communication!
I cant for the life of me, understand why communication can be so difficult for so many people? It just boggles my mind
To be honest, I really just want to answer every thread on here with - TALK TO YOUR PARTNER!!! GET OFF THE INTERNET AND TALK TO YOUR PARTNER!!!
IMe, the most frustrating thing about being in a relationship, is not knowing whats going on in your partners mind. We are not mind readers, and thats why communication is paramount!
Absolutely.. I've posted in several threads how my wife and I communicate. Its something we did in years past then we fell behind and stopped... and the problems started to rear in especially with the stresses we are currently living through. I will admit it is a bit structured with set "rules" and questions to ask each other but it works for us... and limits the possibility of miscommunication.
Yes we could answer everythread with talk to your partner.. I"m just surprised no one really asks guidance on how or what they should talk about.
ScarletG, does his story sound like an equal division of chores to you? Because if I wrote the same thing with a feminine user name I have a feeling your response would be different.
Wyatt, your wife sounds like my brother, who I believe is the biggest jerk to his wife. I can't know your relationship, but I do know there is NO such thing as fair and equal. The 2 of you just have to find a situation you can BOTH live with. It sounds to me like she is not concerned about your well-being.
Good luck, Rg
Quote:
Originally Posted by ScarletG
No...your wife is not spoiled...you just aren't acting like a jerk.
Quote:
Originally Posted by CSD610
Why is he acting like a jerk? Chores around the house should be done by both who live in the home not just one or the other. I do not do all household chores alone and Mr. CSD does not do all outdoor chores alone, we both do what is needed when it is needed from mowing the lawn to doing the laundry.
The jerk is the wife or husband who feels entitled to do little to nothing.
Original Poster: You need to talk to your wife and get this situation worked out very soon before it becomes a much bigger issue in your marriage and causes more trouble than it already has.
Read Scarlet's post again. She is saying the OP is NOT a jerk.
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