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Your 3rd world hoar basically is telling you "Back in old country a man could have eight vaginas on his body and the age of them all would amount to his current age". Again in the OLD WORLD the younger women will instantly get the pick of the more fortunate men. In some places the less wealthier men will just prune off somebodies kid from the flock because the family is too poor to support them. Again your friends greatest fear is being an unlovable spinster. They want sex, and want family, and will do anything to maintain that household together no matter what.
Again your co-workers and you are adults your not thirteen year olds. Love is for young people. That is why love only real when there is an age difference, or when both parties are young. That is why many people marry people they grew up with and not some stranger.
IT is hard for strangers to meet and then get a long especially when they are both old.
Your 3rd world hoar basically is telling you "Back in old country a man could have eight vaginas on his body and the age of them all would amount to his current age". Again in the OLD WORLD the younger women will instantly get the pick of the more fortunate men. In some places the less wealthier men will just prune off somebodies kid from the flock because the family is too poor to support them. Again your friends greatest fear is being an unlovable spinster. They want sex, and want family, and will do anything to maintain that household together no matter what.
Again your co-workers and you are adults your not thirteen year olds. Love is for young people. That is why love only real when there is an age difference, or when both parties are young. That is why many people marry people they grew up with and not some stranger.
IT is hard for strangers to meet and then get a long especially when they are both old.
I work with a large amount of nurses from 3rd world countries,and what do you know,they taught me that marriage is not for love,but its really a business partnership.
Think about this....why do people in other countries have marriages that last decades,but over 50% of American's divorce because of $$$ issues?
If i get married,i have to look at it as a business arrangement.
No matter how much i love a man(which i doubt will EVER happen) he has to be able to keep the marriage afloat financially,but so do i,and we have to do that together.
On nurse said that if 2 men approach you,and one has better finances,but you do not Love him,marry him instead of the guy you do love,because she said there is no such thing as love at first sight. That is infactuation.
She said that only happens in Disney movies.
love grows.
As you see your husband taking care of business,you will grow to love him.
Marriage is supposed to be 2 people bringing their resources together to create one household.
I get their point,but i am not convinced all the way.
I am going to try to look at potential partners from a business perspective.
The majority of the world still does the arranged marriage thing. Both have pros and cons. If you look at from their perspective then I can see how looking at attributes such as finance and jobs are a factor when looking for a spouse. You don't really know the person yet. In countries where arranged marriages are the norm they also look at family. For example do you come from a "good" or "bad" family but we do that here also. Also, "love" to me is a verb. It isn't a feeling but the doing. It is difficult to make an intellectual or logical argument about who people end up with. I know couples that have nothing in common are happy and they don't even know how they ended up together. I know couples that have much in common and are miserable. You never know how people treat each other behind closed doors. Marriage is a good thing and I wish people wouldn't give up on it.
Arranged marriages is about preserving culture. It keeps men men, and women women. Personally I see tons of immigrant women and men looking for sex and excitement. Rarely we find this in 1st world nations anymore. Because those groups households are usually upper class or has been damaged by luxury. That is why it best to thin the blood sometimes.
When your own nation peoples are unable to preserve there own culture retards take over. That is why you turn on the news we see 90% of the problems is just laws that could be stripped away to make every-bodies life easier. The truth is people are making harder for other people to make there lives more easier.
If you could shield a person from all of the horrors of the world and keep them innocent but enough for them to survive into the next generation and have them arranged it would save people many trouble. One of the biggest things in this world is to find an decent person you could have understanding between each other.
Take for example your kid is mentally disabled. Who is going to take care of him or her. Then again your kid has an skill that is admired by many but does not bring meat to the table enough. Then again your kid is an unruly person that is animistic. Who is going to deal with that. In the long run somebody has to take the responsibility. You just can't depend on the state/fed to lock them away and collect money off them for nothing. Who is going to take care of mom or dad when they still reserve the right to be independent and not incompetent. Things like that adds up. People do not have an short answer because they are too afraid.
Right now, I make about six times the amount that my husband does. I pay for about 95% of our bills and have since we moved in together about two years ago. There will become a time when he will probably end up earning what I make or slightly more. A lot more if he ends up going to medical school. It really won't be that long until he outearns me. And I am no slouch!
Take this for what it's worth as I've only been married for two months now:
Marriage isn't solely like a busines partnership, but is a partnership in every sense of the word. There are times where you will make more, times where your partner will make more... but the minute you start fully score-keeping on that kind of stuff, you're pretty much doomed. He is my partner and I love him. I respect him for who he is and value that. Life isn't about money, but it surely helps that we are on the same page for financial goals and for things we want out of life. But money isn't everything. Just another piece of the pie.
Marry for love but keep at least three or four banking accounts. One joint for living and household expenses, one for joint savings or a retirement fund, and one personal one for each of you.
My reasoning for this is I married young and I didn't know how to handle money and my spouse wouldn't help me with the finances. We were in too much debt because of my lack of experience handling money, but we did pay it off.
After I divorced and met another man, moved in together and allowed him to handle the money. I had no debt when we first got together. He was claiming bankruptcy and of course blamed it on his wife. We got engaged and I foolishly handed over my paycheck and didn't participate in the finances. Before I knew it, we had all this debt in my name and he only had two credit cards because of the bankruptcy and I couldn't understand why because we were making enough money that we shouldn't have been struggling financially. After six years of trusting him with our finances (and I made more $ than him), he was paying down his debt, but paying the bare minimum on mine.
We bought a house a couple of years before I realized this. I decided to end the engagement and split largely due to the money issue. We planned on being apart within six months. Foolishly I still allowed him to handle the money. I came home from work one day to find a bill on the table and he had joined Match.com. I went and opened my own checking account that day. I wasn't paying for his membership to Match..lol I ended up buying him out and struggled with the credit card debt that I thought he was paying. It was my stupidity for trusting someone that I loved with my money.
It was just another hard lesson learned in life.
You can't grow to love a person that might end up being an abuser, an arrogant jerk or any other negative character flaw. We all put on our best faces in the beginning, but some people turn into total whack jobs once they're married and I'm referring to both sexes.
I watch way too much true crime shows! lol
This is the most ignorant thing I have ever read in my entire life.
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