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It means meeting someone over the course of your every day life. Not online dating. Not being set up. Not through singles events.
Its hard for me to do. I met the last person I dated this way, and found it amazing, but its just hard to do.
It's really hard and it's hard for the dumbest reason. When I'm out with my friends, I'm usually out with them. I'm not in a situation to be out with friends and then trying to hit on women in the process. I'm not saying that I'm against it, it's usually just not at the top of my priority list.
Location: RI, MA, VT, WI, IL, CA, IN (that one sucked), KY
41,938 posts, read 36,784,331 times
Reputation: 40634
Quote:
Originally Posted by weezerfan84
It's really hard and it's hard for the dumbest reason. When I'm out with my friends, I'm usually out with them. I'm not in a situation to be out with friends and then trying to hit on women in the process. I'm not saying that I'm against it, it's usually just not at the top of my priority list.
That. Or with me, when I'm out alone, there are rarely any women around. I seriously don't know where single women my age range hang out in good numbers, or at least where they would hang out that I could tolerate.
That. Or with me, when I'm out alone, there are rarely any women around. I seriously don't know where single women my age range hang out in good numbers, or at least where they would hang out that I could tolerate.
I know it exactly what they do here. The only problem is that I stink at tennis and I'm not a fan of running. Those are two things in my area that the woman to man ratio is very high. I've tried to pick up running many times and I just couldn't get into it. No wonder I love mountain bike riding and the only women riding tend to be married ones. I've just been stuck with online dating, even though it hasn't been very successful as of late.
Location: RI, MA, VT, WI, IL, CA, IN (that one sucked), KY
41,938 posts, read 36,784,331 times
Reputation: 40634
Quote:
Originally Posted by weezerfan84
I know it exactly what they do here. The only problem is that I stink at tennis and I'm not a fan of running. Those are two things in my area that the woman to man ratio is very high. I've tried to pick up running many times and I just couldn't get into it. No wonder I love mountain bike riding and the only women riding tend to be married ones. I've just been stuck with online dating, even though it hasn't been very successful as of late.
Ah, I've looked for a tennis partner for years, w/o success. And while I hate running, I do it 4x a week, but it is male dominated here. It's the only thing that keeps the weight off for me.
Ah, I've looked for a tennis partner for years, w/o success. And while I hate running, I do it 4x a week, but it is male dominated here. It's the only thing that keeps the weight off for me.
The last situation in which I want to meet someone is when I'm sweating in 90 degree heat while running. And anyway I suck at running almost as much as I suck at dating.
My friend had an opportunity one time while running with his dog though. He tripped on the leash in front of a cute girl. The girl stopped to make sure he was ok. I told him it was the perfect chance to use a cheesy line like "I've fallen for you," but he didn't think of it at the time.
All of my major relationships have involved a chance meeting. I met several women at large social gatherings, I met my ex-wife at the bar in a sushi restaurant, and I met another woman walking my dog. I met my wife through a convoluted process where a guy that I knew in high school was trying to assemble a super team for pub trivia and his girlfriend was a former coworker of my wife. I am the science ringer, and she is the literature specialist, and we still play every week, more than three years later.
I don't think that I ever went out specifically looking for a relationship (or a hookup) once I turned 24 or so, and I never tried online dating. I do have friends who cannot be single without having a number one goal of meeting women in every social interaction that they have. I see what the OP means when saying "unsufferable" although in my own head I describe the behavior as "tacky." A friend of mine once asked me if I could use my truck to help him move, and when I agreed, he asked me to bring some single women to help as well. It is not just men who are like that either, as I once had a woman ask me out at at the funeral for a high school friend of mine who was a marine killed in Iraq, and she was the sister of his widow. I guess that compared to others, I simply haven't placed finding a romantic partner far above all other social interactions in my life.
I don't think there is anything wrong with actively looking for a partner, but I also feel that there is much more to the life experience than coupling up.
Can you give examples of how they are insufferable? I doubt anyone is insufferable on purpose.
Okay, I haven't been actively perusing profiles, but I just got a reply from a girl I messaged a little ways back. We had quite a few favorite bands in common so I mentioned our similar musical inclinations, and got, "Thanks. But I wasn't looking for approval!" Um... okay. I apologized and said I was just trying to make conversation.
I don't even understand. If there was something about my profile that made her disinterested so in me, why bother replying at all? Shame on me for making the effort, I guess.
It's really hard and it's hard for the dumbest reason. When I'm out with my friends, I'm usually out with them. I'm not in a situation to be out with friends and then trying to hit on women in the process. I'm not saying that I'm against it, it's usually just not at the top of my priority list.
This is exactly how I feel. When I am out with my friends, we are basically looking to spend time with each other. We value that time together, and this is especially true when I'm with my two best friends because we live in 3 different states. We might eye up a guy we think is good-looking, but we're not going to do anything about it.
Amusingly, my two best friends went on a vacation together and ended up being hit on by some really hot guy. They kept batting him back and forth between each other and then complained about it to me later. "I set her up to get laid and she didn't act on it!" they each said, almost verbatim, about the other.
It totally cracked me up - I told them it was like some post-modern version of The Gift Of The Magi.
Location: RI, MA, VT, WI, IL, CA, IN (that one sucked), KY
41,938 posts, read 36,784,331 times
Reputation: 40634
Quote:
Originally Posted by Tune_It_Lower
I don't even understand. If there was something about my profile that made her disinterested so in me, why bother replying at all? Shame on me for making the effort, I guess.
Wait, what was your question that you posed to her? You didn't just say you had similar tastes, did you? That isn't making conversation.
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