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Others seldom see us the way we see ourselves, and that isn't odd. It is individuals being unique.
Everything we wear represents a look, and different people will favor different looks. As long as they treat you well, to admonish them is seeking a problem that does not exist.
I wasn't saying it's weird that he likes glasses. I was replying to the question of whether it's weird that the guy brought it up twice in conversation.
I wasn't saying it's weird that he likes glasses. I was replying to the question of whether it's weird that the guy brought it up twice in conversation.
I totally get liking the glasses look, lots of guys I've dated have commented about liking the way I look in glasses, that's not the issue. The issue is repeatedly bringing it up with this air of disappointment that I'm not wearing them. I don't mind wearing them around the house or on a casual day, but to be honest they hurt after wearing them for more than a couple of hours, and I'm not crazy about the way I look in them so they make me a bit self conscious. I did tell him after he brought it up on our second date that I'm don't really like the way I look in glasses, in hopes that he'd drop mentioning it again....so we'll see what happens.
I really don't consider this weird or a red flag. He considers you a sexual interest and has a bit of a fetish for ladies in glasses, thinks it's sexy and would like to see you wearing them. The WAY in which he says it, is mildly annoying, though.
He is hoping you'll take the clue and wear them for him.
If you dig the guy and want to turn him on, then do it. Otherwise, don't. Some men (most, I think) love it when a woman goes out of her way to do something they find sexy. So...your call.
But if he brought it up again, I'd cheekily smile at him and start asking him questions instead of being defensive about it. I'd say, "This is the fourth time you've brought this up. Are you trying to tell me something? Got a fetish for ladies in glasses, do we? Want to see me wearing mine, for you?" Communication, it's a golden thing... I would also make very direct eye contact with him and state that although you might be willing to indulge his little fetish, you are getting tired of hearing him talk about women misrepresenting themselves, and if he insinuates that you are dishonest one more time, he'll never hear from you again.
I've been with men who liked me in lingerie. Doesn't mean that they wanted the lingerie more than they wanted me. It just enhances the lady they are enjoying, I don't see why it's a problem. There are way, WAY weirder things that a man could want in a partner.
Just to be clear - I don't think that liking the way she looks in glasses is offensive - or that telling her that he likes the way she looks in glasses is offensive. I think insinuating that she misrepresented herself is what is offensive.
Just to be clear - I don't think that liking the way she looks in glasses is offensive - or that telling her that he likes the way she looks in glasses is offensive. I think insinuating that she misrepresented herself is what is offensive.
Yep, it's like he's saying that all women are liars and she is a case in point.
He needs to get set straight on that. How he handles being called out would also illuminate quite a bit about his character, IMO.
So have been out with this guy from OLD twice. I have 6 pics on my dating profile in which one of them I am wearing glasses (no glasses in the other 5 since I mainly wear contacts). Anyway when this guy and I first started communicating he commented and liked the pic with the glasses. Fast forward to the middle of our first date (which was going well) he was saying how often he meets people that don't look like their pics and then went on to say to me "obviously you're very attractive but I kinda was expecting a girl with glasses", so I told him I don't wear them often and that most of my pics were without glasses, he agreed and said "yea that's a good point", and then told me I had beautiful eyes and that was the end of that topic.
Then second date in the middle of the date again he goes on to say how people often misrepresent themselves on OLD, and says to me "I mean you're adorable" and then babbled something about how he clicked the like button on my pic with the glasses and when he met me, no glasses. So I asked him if he was trying to say I was one of those people who he thinks misrepresented herself and he said "no, I didn't say you". And then went on to ask me how often if ever do I wear my glasses.
Anyway he acts like he's attracted to me but I can't help feeling like he's really disappointed about the glasses thing. When he says this it makes me question whether he really is attracted to me or not, I mean I don't look that different with glasses on. I understand bringing it up once, but every time I see him? Is it weird?
This? This right here? This whole whiny petty line of inquiry combined with sheer dumbassery? ^^^
Is why I don't do OLD.
What an annoying guy. Now fast-forward 6 months. You have a date planned. Maybe you've been hinting at it being a hot night.
But you start throwing up at work and have to go home. Plus, you have to cancel your date, because hello, puke?
And there's this guy: "Well, not saying you, but sometimes people cancel dates because they don't want to have sex. And I was kind of looking forward to sex."
Because I can promise you, that is what this idiot is going to be like.
Yep, it's like he's saying that all women are liars and she is a case in point.
He needs to get set straight on that. How he handles being called out would also illuminate quite a bit about his character, IMO.
Yes and the way he was saying women misrepresent themselves was more along the lines of them looking attractive in their pics, but when he meets them in person they're unattractive, or they state they're athletic and toned and instead turn out to be overweight...hence him prefacing saying that with "obviously you're very attractive"so that I wouldn't think he was insinuating I was one of those girls. But the fact that he brought it up a second time, makes me raise an eyebrow.
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