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You keep saying compromise.. what is the compromise?
The person who wants the dog always gets a dog? Sorry, but a dog is a lot of work and only causes stress.
If both people aren't on the same page, a dog probably is not a good idea.
You don't lead on your partner and their child...you don't just stomp your feet about the issue and not discuss the topic like an adult because you get off denying someone something they want.
There could be a 1000 good reasons not to get a dog....either at that time or forever....but one person doesn't get to make the decision in a couple by solitary edict.
I don't think the advice here is drastic at all. Your missing the point and the issue here is no longer about getting a dog. It's how she treated my son in the process and how she made him feel by telling us we would have to move out if we wanted a dog. This is cold heart behavior and not how I want my son or myself treated. She handled it wrong and in doing so may have lost me and him forever
My first thought when reading the OP was to snort and go, "no wonder she doesn't want a dog...you don't need two b------ in the house". But reading through the thread and the OP's update, this might be an issue of miscommunication. As far as the dog discussion goes, I like dogs, had one growing up, I kiss and pet the friendly ones I know, but I have a kid and that's enough for me. I don't think it means anything that she doesn't want a dog. I think she it was a little boneheaded to take a kid to see the dogs because, as anyone with kids knows, kids get excited about stuff like that. Her telling him they would have to move if they wanted a dog sounds worse than it probably was meant to be. We can't distinguish tone and exact words through a secondhand account online, but it's possible she didn't mean it like "my way or the highway" like it sounded. It could be that she's just blunt and it comes off as mean, and the OP might be a little on the sensitive side. Who knows?
OP, if you and your son are living with her, to be straight with you, I wouldn't have even floated the idea of getting a dog. It's...not your house, dude. Dogs are great, but they're a lot of work. You already have the two of you and your kid. I wouldn't tolerate her talking crazy to my son like that if that's what she was doing, but outside of his well-being, you gotta do what you gotta do to keep the woman you're sleeping with happy. Dogs are a luxury. Furthermore, it doesn't sound like you're crazy about her or your living arrangement, which might explain some of this petulant vibe that I get from you.
I don't know how rude she was to your son, I wasn't there. But from what you said sounded to me like she was trying to say you guys would have to move out and get a bigger place if you were to get a dog. Doesn't sound like she blew him off from what you wrote, but then again you know better since you were there.
She sounds like she should work with her communication skills. Also if she does things like wants your son to think he would get things but don't give them , that is a bad issue.
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