I'm in a sexless marriage

[Zen88]

It's a straightforward answer, and a possibility. One more suggestion is he's getting 'it' on the side from someone else, man or woman. These things do happen whether we like to admit it or not. I'm not saying it's ok, I'm saying it does happen.

[Raena77]

Originally Posted by 19kelly87

I'm in a sexless marriage and I hate it. I don't understand it. I am depressed because of it. I feel insecure, undesirable and lonely. My husband and I have only been married three years. I am 27 and He is 39. In the beginning there were no issues. In fact, we had sex every day if not multiple times a day. We were in love and in lust and it was beautiful. But it all stopped. We went through a VERY difficult time as he became addicted to opiates. That almost ruined us. It completely ruined our sex life. It killed our closeness and our partnership. He has been in recovery since 02/2015 and he has stopped using, got a job, stopped lying and stealing from me. He became my husband again. All except for the sex. We love each other and I know he is not cheating on me. We cuddle and talk. We are close when we go to bed at night. We just don't have sex and when I try he pushes me away. We usually have sex once every 5-6 weeks and when we have sex its very quick and very boring. At one point in time we could go for an hour or more and it was fun and enjoyable. Now, 5 minutes is about normal. I have asked him what the problem is and he tells me he just isn't in the mood. That it's not me, it's him and he knows he needs to go to the doctor. He never goes though. Part of me really resents him for it. I am 27 and it's not like we have been married for 20 years and have kids and are just going through a dull period. We have been together three years in November...we should still be quite in love and regularly having sex. We should still be trying to discover one another and learn how to be one. It breaks my heart. I never thought I would be in a sexless marriage. He knows all this too and still nothing changes.

I think the drugs messed him up.Maybe he needs viagra now.