Where Some cultural norms of yesteryear More conducive to long term relationships (females, attracted)

[JustJulia]

‘Women and Children First’? On Sinking Ships, It’s Every Man for Himself — History in the Headlines

[49ersfan27]

Originally Posted by JoeCollege

What year was it that dating was easy for everyone and relationships were great?

I'd say the 1960's. I heard from my grandmother that dating was far less complicated then as it is now.

[Lilac110]

Originally Posted by 2mares

Exactly rare and some.
If women could get jobs they were paid less than men. For a long time, I can remember this, there were women's jobs listings and men's jobs listings. Single women could not get their own credit. It was financially difficult for a single woman to live on her own.

You have a hefty dose of entitlement if you feel the world should work to insure that men have a fair shot at love and happiness at the expense of the other half of the population.

My father was one of the original MadMen. That show was so much like reality, I couldn't watch it.

Basically women were stuck in the steno pool, sexually harassed at the workplace left and right, and were treated as inferiors, right down to being addressed by their first names vs. men being addressed with honorifics.

The only people lamenting women's empowerment and self-sufficiency are certain men who feel threatened by it. Poor babies, they're not in control anymore.

[Mikala43]

Originally Posted by Ascension2012

Not really. It just makes me sad when i interact with its victims in everyday life or in threads on forums like this one.

The main person complaining on this thread is the OP, and he's a guy.

[ohio_peasant]

Originally Posted by Lilac110

Basically women were stuck in the steno pool, sexually harassed at the workplace left and right, and were treated as inferiors, right down to being addressed by their first names vs. men being addressed with honorifics.

This is true. And if we go back another generation or two - to the early 20th century, and prior - there were hardly any women in the workplace. "Female" jobs were limited to domestic service, midwifery, agricultural labor, sewing and associated tasks in textile mills, secondary assistance in the family business, teaching elementary-school, and prostitution. Paid work outside of the home was something that a woman would abandon upon getting married. With no women in the workplace, there was no opportunity for workplace sexual harassment. Instead of being condescendingly addressed by their first-name, women were largely not addressed at all, because they were absent from the world of men.

I won't contend that this was a just world, or some utopian world. It wasn't. But I will contend that as there is an increase in the rights and privileges and dignity of the many, there is a partial reduction in the privileges of the few. It is NOT zero-sum. On the whole it's a gain. But neither is it universal gain.

A portion of my maternal grandmother's family were titled aristocrats in Imperial Russia. Two generations prior to that, they owned vast estates, and untold numbers of serfs. I can only speculate about great-great-great-grandfather Ohio Peasant, with casual sexual access to dozens (hundreds?) of helpless young women. Wow. I think that I need to go fondle my orb and scepter. They're 3D printed.

[Ascension2012]

Originally Posted by Mikala43

The main person complaining on this thread is the OP, and he's a guy.

Yeah, I never specified that it was the spinster women that made me sad. I meant both men and women who are having hard time with modern dating and relationships.

[Mikala43]

Originally Posted by Ascension2012

Yeah, I never specified that it was the spinster women that made me sad. I meant both men and women who are having hard time with modern dating and relationships.

Honestly, I don't see a problem. Is it difficult to find a match that you want to be with for the rest of your life? Of course - shouldn't it be?

All this about "roles"? It's whatever works for the couple. There are literally millions of variations of what can work when merging two lives.

Most people who complain are not interested in changing themselves, they want the world to change to suit them, and that ain't happening.

[MoonBeam33]

Originally Posted by Ascension2012

See this is what you guys are missing. You want to see the prefeminist marriage as something that men wanted and victimized women because of it. But it really wasnt all like that, despite feminized history version youve been taught. Every men was taught to respect women, to aid them when they were in need, to take care of them, to make sure their needs were met.

Sure, except for when he was legally allowed to beat her because dinner was late, or she "mouthed off," or she didn't want to have sex that night, or she didn't want to have yet another child, or she looked at another man...

And of course, it was perfectly acceptable for him to have a mistress or even a whole other family if he so chose.

Good times, good times.

[Mikala43]

All you guys know where the term "rule of thumb" came from? The stick you beat your wife with had to be smaller than your thumb to be legal. Awww, now I'm downright nostalgic.

[TabulaRasa]

Originally Posted by Mikala43

All you guys know where the term "rule of thumb" came from? The stick you beat your wife with had to be smaller than your thumb to be legal. Awww, now I'm downright nostalgic.

Actually, a while a fairly commonly held belief, not, in fact, true:

The Straight Dope: Does "rule of thumb" refer to an old law permitting wife beating?