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I'll try to keep this as brief as possible and appreciate any and all feedback. Here we go!
I've known the girl in question for about four years, dating back to when we use to work together. For around two of these years she was in a serious relationship for 2-3 years. Well, that didn't work out and she started rebounding for a while. Fast Forward a year and I ask her out. She responds by saying "She'll think about it." A week later she texts me that she didn't want to give me the wrong idea and doesn't want to hurt our friendship.
Fast forward to today, nine months later, we have only talked three or four times total. But ever since my birthday she's been flirty, calling me nicknames that she has never done before and using "winky faces". She suggested we catch a concert together later this month as a group and I agreed. I then suggested we (4 of us) do drinks this weekend and that appears to be happening. She keeps saying how much she "can't wait" until Friday. I'm really confused about the whole situation. This was a girl who I considered my best friend for a long time. Not sure if she's just getting comfortable with me again, wants the attention or has a general interest in dating. That's about it...
Thanks for reading. You can tell me how much I'm an idiot down below!
- She misses your interest and attention and wants that back (basically, validation).
- She was secretly dating someone else and just broke that off.
- She had time to think about it and decided to give it a try.
- She was playing games and realized that her initial approach didn't result in you chasing her (so she's changing her approach).
Of course, it could be any number of different things, but these are the scenarios that I've experienced/observed the most.
I say go and see what happens. That's the only way to find out for sure. If she shoots you down again, just move on.
Tell her that you can't be friends with her anymore because you are attracted to her and it distracting you from pursuing dating and a relationship anyone else. She will either suggest going out on a date, or she will pout about for a couple of days then forget you. Either way you will be in a better situation after you tell her that than you are currently.
Fast forward to today, nine months later, we have only talked three or four times total. But ever since my birthday she's been flirty, calling me nicknames that she has never done before and using "winky faces". She suggested we catch a concert together later this month as a group and I agreed. I then suggested we (4 of us) do drinks this weekend and that appears to be happening. She keeps saying how much she "can't wait" until Friday. I'm really confused about the whole situation. This was a girl who I considered my best friend for a long time. Not sure if she's just getting comfortable with me again, wants the attention or has a general interest in dating. That's about it...
Thanks for reading. You can tell me how much I'm an idiot down below!
Can you explain how the two highlighted areas go together?
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I'll try to keep this as brief as possible and appreciate any and all feedback. Here we go!
I've known the girl in question for about four years, dating back to when we use to work together. For around two of these years she was in a serious relationship for 2-3 years. Well, that didn't work out and she started rebounding for a while. Fast Forward a year and I ask her out. She responds by saying "She'll think about it." A week later she texts me that she didn't want to give me the wrong idea and doesn't want to hurt our friendship.
Fast forward to today, nine months later, we have only talked three or four times total. But ever since my birthday she's been flirty, calling me nicknames that she has never done before and using "winky faces". She suggested we catch a concert together later this month as a group and I agreed. I then suggested we (4 of us) do drinks this weekend and that appears to be happening. She keeps saying how much she "can't wait" until Friday. I'm really confused about the whole situation. This was a girl who I considered my best friend for a long time. Not sure if she's just getting comfortable with me again, wants the attention or has a general interest in dating. That's about it...
Thanks for reading. You can tell me how much I'm an idiot down below!
You're no longer interested or she thinks you are no longer interested which is unacceptable . That's why you're on her flirting sniper scope.
You're no longer interested or she thinks you are no longer interested which is unacceptable . That's why you're on her flirting sniper scope.
There's your answer. Think about it, you knew it already, you were just hoping this wasn't the case, which is fine. As was also posted, I'd advise you to avoid this girl like the plague.
Want to see where she's at mentally, though? Ignore her. No contact whatsoever, and when she calls you (which she will, after the appropriate 'omg he's not chasing me' phase passes), keep it short but friendly, as if she's just some old acquaintance you haven't bothered to call. When she flirts around about getting together, you're busy that night (with another girl). You will witness a massive change in her behavior, brother.
Most men are too eager and thirsty to reverse roles on a game-playing, attention-seeking woman, and are happy to be her back-up man, at least until the next shiny object catches her eye.
Last edited by BobCaldwell; 07-30-2015 at 05:20 AM..
An idiot. Like many of us simple men, we often get swayed by the nuance of a woman. If she's truly interested, time will tell.
I allowed myself to be strung along for a long time... And in fairness to her, she probably was serious. At least her words were
Good luck!
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