Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
Not everything is better with every relationship, it's a give and take. My husband treats me better than any other man I've been with, but he won't go down on me, which used to be a dealbreaker for me. Other men were great at that, but were ****ty to me. So you decide what is more important and you move forward.
Wow, I never got the whole thing about guys not wanting to perform oral on women...
Hmmm… To be honest, the way I used to look at things was that each new person I was with was someone that I had stronger feelings for than the last person I was with. I can't say that I would have stayed with someone if I thought they weren't better for me than someone that I broke up with. My husband is definitely the best person for me and we have the best relationship I've ever had. If he wasn't - I wouldn't have chosen to spend my life with him.
Every relationship IS different. Years ago, I was with a very narcissistic man - however, he treated me very well at a time when I needed a lot of TLC to pull myself out of a very deep rut. He was the perfect relationship at that time for me then - I would never be with him again in a million years though. (He utterly failed to be the father his son from a previous relationship needed, and I simply cannot forgive that, even if I am grateful for what he did for me.) But that relationship reshaped the direction of my life and contributed greatly to the happy life I live now. It was the "best" relationship of my life only because it set me on the path to who I am now and induced more good changes in my life than any other relationship has since.
However, it ended years ago. I've had other meaningful relationships since then, but that was the "big" one. In my view, that relationship is not exactly comparable to any relationship I've had as a happy, fully developed and fully realized adult - it involved a very sad and lost young woman taking refuge with a very flawed man whose main virtue was to be very devoted to his projects. That relationship quite possibly saved my life.
But I don't want that relationship again or anything resembling it. It would not be the right relationship for the person I am now. And since I don't need to go through any sort of metaphorical rebirth these days, I doubt any future relationship would have anywhere near much of an impact on who I am at my core.
That long-ago relationship and any relationship I have entered into or may enter into as a happy and mature adult is simply apples and oranges.
I dont know why a guy would ask this type of question, it makes you look weak and insecure. Youre also putting your girl in a position to lie, because there is only one good answer to that question. If you want to win at this, assume that you are the best and carry on as normal.
The fact that you need verbal reassurance that you are the best thing ever is just a sure sign of your insecurity.
He's only asking her if he's the best person she's been with. That's not unreasonable. It's not like he's demanding gifts, asking her to give up a hobby or that she spends less time with her friends, which is what really insecure people do.
Had an argument lately about it with my significant other. Am I being unrealistic or over the line with my expectations? The expectations are I want to know what we have is better than anything either of us had in the past. She denies these claims saying that it doesnt work like that and it's not a competition. But isnt that the purpose of every new relationship? Taking it to the next level instead of just saying "every relationship is different". I feel like part of my thinking is ego related but I can't seem to know how to get rid of this mindset.
I don't blame you for feeling that way. Who doesn't want to be the best right? As far as ego goes it is like a belly button, everyone has on including the ones who deny it. Relax and enjoy the ride
He's only asking her if he's the best person she's been with. That's not unreasonable. It's not like he's demanding gifts, asking her to give up a hobby or that she spends less time with her friends, which is what really insecure people do.
On point. I have no issues with her hanging out with male friends by herself, I love the concept of space and hate being clingy, don't get jealous of anything...this goes more into hey I am thinking of this person seriously, and I am about to commit, it's reasonable to do it with person that's better than anybody you met before
You said it! I can't imagine compromising on that issue.
Please register to post and access all features of our very popular forum. It is free and quick. Over $68,000 in prizes has already been given out to active posters on our forum. Additional giveaways are planned.
Detailed information about all U.S. cities, counties, and zip codes on our site: City-data.com.
Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
