Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
Equality isnt only when its convenient for you. You were told you had to compete with men and be like men, and you wonder what killed chivalry? Its either we stick to traditional dating roles or the modern ones. You cant pick and choose from both, when it benefits you.
Equality isnt only when its convenient for you. You were told you had to compete with men and be like men, and you wonder what killed chivalry? Its either we stick to traditional dating roles or the modern ones. You cant pick and choose from both, when it benefits you.
I think you forget who you're talking to. Back it up, my friend.
I don't pick and choose. I know what roles I prefer and I don't stray. I can't speak for other women.
I think you forget who you're talking to. Back it up, my friend.
I don't pick and choose. I know what roles I prefer and I don't stray. I can't speak for other women.
It sounds like you did chose when you said "HE will if HE'S interested". Maybe if it was "A person (regardless of gender) who is interested will put the effort to contact you" or something it wouldn't sound like you are picking/choosing equality when it suits you.
You do agree that its not only men who should put some effort, initiative, contacting, show interest, etc. right? Or are these a man's responsibility/duty? Nothing wrong with that. Besides, it is what most women prefer anyways.
He suggested a night you were busy, the ball is in your court now. How about you suggesting what day you might not be busy?
This. It's pretty simple, OP. And what do you mean, "Why cancel a first date, if you're concerned about the impression you might make?" Stuff happens, OP. Sometimes people have to cancel and reschedule. Why are you making this so difficult? Really, it sounds like your topic isn't even about texting, it's about basic set-up-a-date protocol. If a guy suggests a time that you're busy, you say, "Oh, I'm busy that night. Can I take a rain check? My schedule's wide open for next weekend..."
If you don't do that, and just say that you're busy that night, he'll get the impression you're brushing him off, because you're not sending any positive signals, only negative.
It sounds like you did chose when you said "HE will if HE'S interested". Maybe if it was "A person (regardless of gender) who is interested will put the effort to contact you" or something it wouldn't sound like you are picking/choosing equality when it suits you.
You do agree that its not only men who should put some effort, initiative, contacting, show interest, etc. right? Or are these a man's responsibility/duty? Nothing wrong with that. Besides, it is what most women prefer anyways.
Checkered was talking about men pursuing. That's what I was responding to.
If a man is interested, he will pursue. Period. Mod cut.
Last edited by PJSaturn; 07-31-2015 at 01:16 PM..
Reason: Bickering.
If a man is interested, he will pursue. Period. [Snip.]
Not if we don't get any indication that she has interest. Oh, we'll pursue initially, but if there is no positive feedback, then nope. Decent guys will just move on. The ones without options or the ones that tend to be obsessive, or really want challenges in courtship, might continue to pursue.
That's not how I read it. He tried to reschedule after he canceled on her, but she said she was busy. Apparently, that was the end of the conversation. He didn't try after that. According to the OP's first few posts, anyway.
I'm interested in your take that the culture has shifted, so men no longer pursue like they used to. I think it's possible that the culture is in the process of shifting, so we're in some kind of no-man's land at this point, where nobody knows what to expect of anyone, lol! What do you think?
I am trying to understand this. The guy asked for a date and she is busy so the date does not take place what is he supposed to do keep asking for a different date? Wouldn't that be kind of annnoying? He made the first attempt and it did not work. I see nothing wrong with asking a lady to text you back regarding a time or day when a date can take place. That way the woman has the freedom to decide when it is convenient to go. Is she sees no need to check in with him at that point then why should he check in with her?
That's not how I read it. He tried to reschedule after he canceled on her, but she said she was busy. Apparently, that was the end of the conversation. He didn't try after that. According to the OP's first few posts, anyway.
I'm interested in your take that the culture has shifted, so men no longer pursue like they used to. I think it's possible that the culture is in the process of shifting, so we're in some kind of no-man's land at this point, where nobody knows what to expect of anyone, lol! What do you think?
Maybe no-mans land is more appropriate. I just think it seems like there is a lot more need for instant gratification/resolution these days born out of impatience.
Here we have two individuals who, as far as I can tell from what I know, are walking away from rescheduling a date because each is assuming the other is not interested because two text messages did not resolve everything. (He because she declined his reschedule offer due to the time being bad for her, but not offering an alternative, her because she thinks he should "pursue" her by offering a second alternative).
Two texts did not resolve it, time to move on.
Yet, I see this behavior as become far more frequent all over the place. The want of everything, immediately, and the fast pace which we lose focus and move on when everything isn't there immediately.
Kind of like the other thread where they are discussing how quickly a couple should be intimate. Again, everything now, or move on.
I of course could be way off, but I really see increasing lack of focus and attention everywhere in society these days.
Please register to post and access all features of our very popular forum. It is free and quick. Over $68,000 in prizes has already been given out to active posters on our forum. Additional giveaways are planned.
Detailed information about all U.S. cities, counties, and zip codes on our site: City-data.com.
Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
