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I HAVE told my soon to be ex that she will NEVER find anyone who puts up with as much of her bullshat and nonsense as I did
and I MEANT it with ever ounce of my being...if she don't get her head out of her arse, she will have a lot of first and maybe second dates and that's it..
LOL my ex said that more often.. quite not sure what was the meaning. But that is true in fact no other man in my life treated me in a bad way like he did ... just saying
worried about my kids seeing this...especially my daughters
If they treat future men like my wife treated me, they will be single and lonely...if they get with the wrong loser guy he is gonna BEAT THEIR ARSE...
Two people have said that to me. One was a guy who I found to be very controlling and possessive. He got alarmingly upset at me when I didn't want to bowl anymore on one of our dates. He also asked me to marry him after only a few dates and was dead serious about it. Of course I declined and this was when he used that line, "You'll never find anyone like me..."
The other was my ex-husband who I have mentioned too many times on this forum. The answer you give them when they tell you that? "That's the point, <insert profane name>."
To the one poster who thinks that a woman in his life was so bad no one will put up with her stuff, the fact is sometimes people bring out different things in other people, so you have no idea how she's gonna be in a different relationship with a different dude, and you've got no room to say such things. Yeah I know, some women are crazy, some men are too, but sometimes people incite the worst in each other without meaning to. She might find something healthier one day. You just don't know.
And men who say "You're never gonna find..." yeah, that is some controlling and manipulative stuff right there. My ex was that sort. Constantly loves to say, "You made a big mistake." Convincing himself that he's a real catch, I guess. I let him say these things, and I don't respond, because as much as I think it's ridiculous, in a way it's so ridiculous it doesn't deserve an answer from me. Also, if it helps his crippled self esteem to think so, who am I to argue? Seeing as how only one of us is actively dating, and getting out and having a fantastic time, and the other is sitting around the house moaning about whether he's gonna be alone forever, I'd say it's not hard to see who made the mistake in not doing what could be done to save the marriage when it was still possible. Oh, well.
I have never. Ever. Seen a situation where this kind of statement was backed by any sort of reality.
Yea it is a bit like the line "No one will ever love you like I do". I am sure the kind of person - male or female - who utters this is just on the point of desperation and thinks that it will make the other person reconsider something like ending a relationship.
But it is actually a horribly insulting thing to say and it will likely do nothing but cement whatever decision the speaker was hoping to reverse. It basically says "You are unloveable and you should count yourself lucky anyone loves you at all and show me the proper gratitude for it".
Is this some kind of negging thing? Like.. "I'm the only one who will put up with you"? This particular man hasn't been treating me very well so I don't know why he would say this. He said he would "work on it" after I told him I felt hurt by certain things he did. I guess I'm just interested in the psychology behind these types of statements
Psychology = Passive Aggression.
Very common but you want to avoid types like this.
(We see them all over CD by the way - subtle nastiness)
LOL that is the last cry from the model passive aggressive male. Just block his calls/texts and it will be his neutralizer. He needs an audience to be effective, so once you shut that door, he become silent and weak.
Is this some kind of negging thing? Like.. "I'm the only one who will put up with you"? This particular man hasn't been treating me very well so I don't know why he would say this. He said he would "work on it" after I told him I felt hurt by certain things he did. I guess I'm just interested in the psychology behind these types of statements
This instinctively reads to me as a red flag of a potential abuser type. But I'm probably off the mark. Just my impression.
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I guess I'm just interested in the psychology behind these types of statements
