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OP, get out now, while you can. It sounds as if you are hard working, driven and responsible. Her, not so much. That, as much as the money itself, is a real compatibility red light.
Lol, if anything, she's the one that should get out.
OP is being abusive and controlling. She's essentially trying to change her.
Theres no "equality" in marriage. Its never 50/50. Two people never make the same amount..well, very rarely. A marriage joins 2 people together so everything is "ours". If you arent' prepared to do that, then you certainly don't need to get married. You already feel that if she isnt making as much money as you, then she isnt "equal" to you.
Good luck with finding someone who makes as much or more than you. Hopefully they will think you arent "equal" to them, and dump you.
Lol, if anything, she's the one that should get out.
OP is being abusive and controlling. She's essentially trying to change her.
OP never says he is ordering her to do anything. His GF has a serious self esteem issues and getting a better job would help her overcome this. I have met many women like this - hell, I used to hire them - college grads doing administrative work because they never tired for anything better.
Encouraging someone who is down on themselves to live up to their potential rather than under-performing or constantly seeking jobs that are beneath their educational lever is ENCOURAGEMENT NOT CONTROL - learn the difference.
OP never says he is ordering her to do anything. His GF has a serious self esteem issues and getting a better job would help her overcome this. I have met many women like this - hell, I used to hire them - college grads doing administrative work because they never tired for anything better.
Encouraging someone who is down on themselves to live up to their potential rather than under-performing or constantly seeking jobs that are beneath their educational lever is ENCOURAGEMENT NOT CONTROL - learn the difference.
No....
The OP admitted to yelling at his gf. That is not acceptable.
Location: RI, MA, VT, WI, IL, CA, IN (that one sucked), KY
41,936 posts, read 36,962,945 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Vacanegro
OP never says he is ordering her to do anything. His GF has a serious self esteem issues and getting a better job would help her overcome this. I have met many women like this - hell, I used to hire them - college grads doing administrative work because they never tired for anything better.
Encouraging someone who is down on themselves to live up to their potential rather than under-performing or constantly seeking jobs that are beneath their educational lever is ENCOURAGEMENT NOT CONTROL - learn the difference.
Yeah, and raising their voice is a great way to "encourage" someone to excel.
OP never says he is ordering her to do anything. His GF has a serious self esteem issues and getting a better job would help her overcome this. I have met many women like this - hell, I used to hire them - college grads doing administrative work because they never tired for anything better.
Encouraging someone who is down on themselves to live up to their potential rather than under-performing or constantly seeking jobs that are beneath their educational lever is ENCOURAGEMENT NOT CONTROL - learn the difference.
Guess what? If she's content doing what she's doing, then that's all that should matter.
The OP should move on if he doesn't like it. And he isn't just "encouraging her."
Hey guys now, before I sound like a total prick, I am going to be honest and say yes, it does bother me that she only makes 11 an hour.
She needs to find someone else that cares about her, not about how much money she makes. It ain't you.
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