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Women don't do much initiating in the early stages. 5 dates is still the early stages. I really can understand your feeling that you are dragging around a heavy weight. You almost feel like an unpaid social activities coordinator.
I wouldn't throw in the towel yet but definitely be more scarce. If she keeps physically escalating, go for it.
Well we're going out again wednesday. I hid my match.com profile and sent her a message this morning after a few days of no contact. She responded within ten minutes again as usual. She said she was excited to hang out again. So I dunno what the hells going on with this chick. It's just different than I am accustomed to. I am just going to play it cool for a few weeks and see if her interest level picks up. Worst case scenario maybe i'll get laid out of it lol.
I really think she's probably just playing it cool. She definitely sounds interested from what you've said about her responses. But you've shown some possible signs of not being that into her or not being interested in getting serious with her, so she's being cautious. I wouldn't want to show too much interest in someone who didn't seem that into me. It hurts and makes you feel stupid later when you realize you were way more into that person than they were into you, and that they knew that.
I really think she's probably just playing it cool. She definitely sounds interested from what you've said about her responses. But you've shown some possible signs of not being that into her or not being interested in getting serious with her, so she's being cautious. I wouldn't want to show too much interest in someone who didn't seem that into me. It hurts and makes you feel stupid later when you realize you were way more into that person than they were into you, and that they knew that.
It would be weird if we were both thinking that way.
I agree with some of the other posters who say that she's probably old fashioned and letting you take the lead. After five good dates, you shouldn't hesitate to tell her that you really like her. If she responds favorably, ask her if she'd like to be exclusive.
And if so, tell that you want her to call you occasionally, so it won't be so one-sided.
I dated an old fashion lady and it turned into a 7 year relationship. During the initial dating, I had no problem with reaching out to her when planning to go out because it would always fit my schedule .
I think you should put out feelers to determine what she is old fashioned with, besides failing to take the initiative.
She might want you to be a bread winner so she can "build a home", be with the kids, etc.
If you like her enough to consider becoming exclusive with her (and she's the only one in 50 you've felt like this about) I'd say its worth mentioning to her that you've enjoyed your 5 dates thus far and asking her where she thinks this is going/where she wants this to go. You don't necessarily have to become exclusive, but clarifying things can be good. If things are still confusing after that, I'd say take TurcoLoco's suggestion.
This is pretty much what I did tonight. We were supposed to go to a really nice restaurant, but I decided I really wasn't ready to pay out for this girl if I'm unsure she's into to me. I asked her if she would like to come over instead and she agreed. At the last minute she came back and said she had nausea or some BS.
I basically told her i've ejoyed our dates and that I've liked her since the first date. That i haven't been dating other people to see where this goes. Where does she think it's going? Her response was that it's hard to get a feel for where it's going when we don't talk a lot. She said she we should hang out again next week and go from there. I pretty much left it at that. I'm going to let her make the next move. I am pretty much over this situation. I got other women I can go out with and I am going to pursue that now. I am just sick of this bull****. I'm too old for these games.
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