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I would bet your reputation among the women of the campus proceeds you.
Secondly I am willing to bet that many of the women are not looking for a permanent relationship right now, they are wanting to explore a bit before they get into a family.
When their biological clock starts ticking a bit louder then the game changes, but till then your fishing in waters that are not hungry.
Be friendly ,chum the waters and maintain a positive mentality ,no reason to be anxious especially at your age .
Your not interested if some woman is desperate and clingy , the door swings both ways my friend.
Reputation? Why would a reputation occur? I dont see whats wrong with asking woman thats not to say i dont ask woman out but i can smell someones who interested in possibly dating but those woman are few and far in between
When im on campus at my school i usually hang out with my buddies playing soocer or a video game or grubbin on subway or if things get too busy we get our homework done
But as for finding a woman yea my schedules already packed enough going to work at school and taking a full load of classes
My busiest days are the weekdays and i have no weekdays off
Only friday sat and sun
Usually i introduce my self to a random woman at school for a few minutes then ask if they are interested in dating but thats it
When you have classes all day u only have a limited amount of time to meet woman
First problem: SEEK is too active a verb in your life. Don't get me wrong, it's natural to want someone steady when you're young, and if you're romantically lonely.
Honestly, there's nothing wrong with this. People tend to dwell too much on relationships in general, hoping to make more of them than actually exists. You've never spoken after that, meaning NEITHER of you cared enough to take/make the time.
Move on, forget it on all counts: Thinking about her OR wondering about yourself. People WILL come and go in your life with increasing and even disconcerting regularity. As you age you will learn most of it means very little.
This starts to become a habit, and the more of a habit it becomes, the more you PROJECT this, even if it's unconsciously. Women see/sense it and don't consider you dating material because your growing, unconscious desperation shows. Men see/sense it and lose respect for you.
That stuff is nifty, but what else do you have to offer? I'm not saying you're a loser, or NOT a great guy, but you seem to be getting rejected and dissatisfied overall with your romantic lot in life. Ergo, SOMETHING is going on.
Look at it this way: Make up your dream girl. Sit down and write down her dreamy-McDreamerson qualities on a sheet of paper.
No, I am NOT kidding. I want you to really, really think about it, take this project VERY seriously.
First you'll list the stuff you want now, of course. Everyone does. Don't worry about looking shallow, we've all got some preferences, and nobody but YOU is going to read this list. So, Dream Girl: She's pretty, she has [__] hair, is [__] tall-ish, has [__] kind of body... Great job. NOTHING wrong with this, it's just a game to provoke thought.
Now, write down some qualities about her such as her mind, her level of education, her level of accomplishment both current and future, her personal goals and drive, level of ambition. Her interesting hobbies, her SKILLS that she exhibits in daily life.
Really think about them. I mean it.
Now then...
At any point when you started that second portion, did you pause, have to back off on anything because as you listed Ms. Wonderful's amazing qualities, you realized YOU didn't quite measure up to what you initially asked? Say, she was outdoorsy and adventurous at first, but you realized you weren't AS outdoorsy and adventurous as you could be, so you backed her quality off to being "somewhat, but also happy at home"...? Did you do ANY of that? Have ANY second thoughts?
Those things right there, IF you did this, are the very sorts of things YOU need to worry about, rather than worrying about dating. Because right now, while you're worried about dating at the age of 22, while you're wasting time on a bunch of women you admit always seem to have excuses so they DON'T date you--
Right now is when you could be becoming Batman. Okay, not really Batman, but becoming the man YOU REALLY WANT TO BE.
Don't pass that by. Take a minute and think about it.
Tell me, have you ever been drunk after getting dumped or jilted, or being rejected by a girl or woman? Or have you ever been around drunks who were? Do you remember the kinds of things they say?
They feel sad, and then they feel a bit angry at the rejection(s), and THEN they say stuff like this:
"To hell with 'em! *sniff* I'm not gonna worry about women anymore! I'm gonna take care of ME, worry about what I want! I'm gonna start working out, and study hard and get successful, and pursue my hobbies and be HAPPY! Yeah, THEN they're gonna see what they've been missing!"
That right there. Those guys are closer than ever to the real answer to all their problems than ever. Only, they won't listen, not even to themselves. They'll go watch internet pornography and eat Cheetos and turn their man-dingers orange and then go right on doing what they've always done, which is BE AVERAGE.
Don't be average anymore. Be Batman. It doesn't mean thrill-seeking, it means goals and ambition, SELF-INTEREST in pursuit of a larger cause, determination, drive, and SELF-FULFILLMENT.
When you become Batman, women will start falling out of the sky for you and they'll have reasons to date, not excuses why they shouldn't.
Stop doing THIS and start doing what I said. Be Batman --
... or be average.
Your dream woman -- what do YOU have to offer such a woman? Because your cuteness and sincerity isn't enough, not if you want to play in the league where you find WOMEN and not GIRLS. It's not that they're materialistic, it's that they know who they are, know what they are, what they're capable of, and they have no reason to settle for a man who's a lesser companion.
I love this post from the guy whose username sounds like a comic book arch-nemisis. I think the Urban Sasquatch wants you to always be Batman so that he can arch you. I'm just saying.
Another thing I've noticed especially with a closed system like a college campus is that you're dealing with a stagnant pool, socially, of people who all know each other. It is smarter to fish outside of that pool. Women already know this, sometimes. At least some of us do. An example...I met a guy who was part of a group of people, I liked all of them quite a lot. I saw myself spending more time with them all in the future, as friends. But he was kind of the leader of that pack. He'd recently suffered a breakup, and was hurting. He was vulnerable and in the position to be seeking attachment, and likely to form it easily. As a new female in his range, he was sniffing me out, and I could tell. This despite the fact that I repeatedly told him I wasn't looking to form a relationship now and didn't want that with him. Honestly, he's not my type on a bunch of levels. I really am interested in being his friend, and (to reference a point from the other similar thread going on now) I did do him a pretty significant financial favor not long ago. I like him. But I don't want him romantically.
And mainly, I was thinking, if we did have a thing, he would attach, and I'd break his heart, and then not only have I lost his friendship, I've lost that of all of his friends, men and women I like very much, as well. It is suddenly super awkward. The whole thing would have been unwise on many levels.
Some women might avoid dating men at their college due to complex overlapping social contacts. They think, if this ends badly, what am I going to have to deal with? Also, women talk. If you had something end with one woman, or some experience that was unpleasant for her, she has likely told every other woman on campus all about it. On the bright side, if you were good enough to rate positive reviews, all of her friends would be aware of that as well. I would avoid dating people at my college for the same reason I'd avoid dating a coworker. Some people do, but I don't think it's smart. You're kind of trapped in that setting if things go sideways.
If you are being friendzoned, it is your own fault. I have a lot of co-workers and acquaintances, many of them I have no interest in but I still flirt with them, say things to create sexual tension and compliment them on their hair, dresses, etc.
You are definitely doing something wrong, probably being the stereotypical "nice guy". If you don't change yourself, you will always finish last.
At work this could be construed as sexual harassment. Not a good idea IMO. No matter how you mean it, it could be coming across creepy and be against company policy.
First problem: SEEK is too active a verb in your life. Don't get me wrong, it's natural to want someone steady when you're young, and if you're romantically lonely.
Honestly, there's nothing wrong with this. People tend to dwell too much on relationships in general, hoping to make more of them than actually exists. You've never spoken after that, meaning NEITHER of you cared enough to take/make the time.
Move on, forget it on all counts: Thinking about her OR wondering about yourself. People WILL come and go in your life with increasing and even disconcerting regularity. As you age you will learn most of it means very little.
This starts to become a habit, and the more of a habit it becomes, the more you PROJECT this, even if it's unconsciously. Women see/sense it and don't consider you dating material because your growing, unconscious desperation shows. Men see/sense it and lose respect for you.
That stuff is nifty, but what else do you have to offer? I'm not saying you're a loser, or NOT a great guy, but you seem to be getting rejected and dissatisfied overall with your romantic lot in life. Ergo, SOMETHING is going on.
Look at it this way: Make up your dream girl. Sit down and write down her dreamy-McDreamerson qualities on a sheet of paper.
No, I am NOT kidding. I want you to really, really think about it, take this project VERY seriously.
First you'll list the stuff you want now, of course. Everyone does. Don't worry about looking shallow, we've all got some preferences, and nobody but YOU is going to read this list. So, Dream Girl: She's pretty, she has [__] hair, is [__] tall-ish, has [__] kind of body... Great job. NOTHING wrong with this, it's just a game to provoke thought.
Now, write down some qualities about her such as her mind, her level of education, her level of accomplishment both current and future, her personal goals and drive, level of ambition. Her interesting hobbies, her SKILLS that she exhibits in daily life.
Really think about them. I mean it.
Now then...
At any point when you started that second portion, did you pause, have to back off on anything because as you listed Ms. Wonderful's amazing qualities, you realized YOU didn't quite measure up to what you initially asked? Say, she was outdoorsy and adventurous at first, but you realized you weren't AS outdoorsy and adventurous as you could be, so you backed her quality off to being "somewhat, but also happy at home"...? Did you do ANY of that? Have ANY second thoughts?
Those things right there, IF you did this, are the very sorts of things YOU need to worry about, rather than worrying about dating. Because right now, while you're worried about dating at the age of 22, while you're wasting time on a bunch of women you admit always seem to have excuses so they DON'T date you--
Right now is when you could be becoming Batman. Okay, not really Batman, but becoming the man YOU REALLY WANT TO BE.
Don't pass that by. Take a minute and think about it.
Tell me, have you ever been drunk after getting dumped or jilted, or being rejected by a girl or woman? Or have you ever been around drunks who were? Do you remember the kinds of things they say?
They feel sad, and then they feel a bit angry at the rejection(s), and THEN they say stuff like this:
"To hell with 'em! *sniff* I'm not gonna worry about women anymore! I'm gonna take care of ME, worry about what I want! I'm gonna start working out, and study hard and get successful, and pursue my hobbies and be HAPPY! Yeah, THEN they're gonna see what they've been missing!"
That right there. Those guys are closer than ever to the real answer to all their problems than ever. Only, they won't listen, not even to themselves. They'll go watch internet pornography and eat Cheetos and turn their man-dingers orange and then go right on doing what they've always done, which is BE AVERAGE.
Don't be average anymore. Be Batman. It doesn't mean thrill-seeking, it means goals and ambition, SELF-INTEREST in pursuit of a larger cause, determination, drive, and SELF-FULFILLMENT.
When you become Batman, women will start falling out of the sky for you and they'll have reasons to date, not excuses why they shouldn't.
Stop doing THIS and start doing what I said. Be Batman --
... or be average.
Your dream woman -- what do YOU have to offer such a woman? Because your cuteness and sincerity isn't enough, not if you want to play in the league where you find WOMEN and not GIRLS. It's not that they're materialistic, it's that they know who they are, know what they are, what they're capable of, and they have no reason to settle for a man who's a lesser companion.
The thing about Batman was that he excelled in multiple areas.
Okay to start off Im a 22 year old college student man
I have a great group of friends pretty much I have enough friends to hang out with on the weekends and since then
The only thing I seek at this point is a romantic woman
I gotten back in the dating scene I have tried to create something like convert a friendship with a woman into something more but I usually give it 2 days or 2 weeks last woman I gave her 2 months and she friendzone me and I was disappointed but we never spoke after that.
Im not mean or anything but im one of those point that get directly to the point after that moment
I don't need friends and don't need no more I have enough and apparently most woman at my college campus have the same excuse
- Have a boyfriend ( well not an excuse but yea well no dating that girl)
- Always busy
- Busy on weekends
- Not interested
- Weekend ( Busy ) Next weekend ( Also busy)
So these people I cut off and just keep asking a whole bunch of woman out but very few I have met that I actually dated I have only dated like 4 woman at my campus but i feel that very little and im surprised to see how very little people are interested in dating.
I actually have a decent body and am a sweetheart and a good well around personality
So any tips you can provide for me?
Look I serious am tired of JUST A FRIENDSHIP I want something more than that and yea I move on really FAST and would talk to multiple woman if thats the case but thats all I seek something more than just a friendship
You should be friendzoning them first and not worrying about dating them first. Do this with a bunch of girls and you will have your pick of several after a while.
Usually i introduce my self to a random woman at school for a few minutes then ask if they are interested in dating but thats it
When you have classes all day u only have a limited amount of time to meet woman
You should be friendzoning them first and not worrying about dating them first. Do this with a bunch of girls and you will have your pick of several after a while.
And how is that possible if most of them bearly have little to no time to even meet? ESPEcially for them?
How do you even date someone who has no time or lacks interest?
This is the only stradegy i got
Its not easy when ur time is very limited and these woman disappear
I have dated woman before like this but very few
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