Why Is Dating So Much Easier for Women than Men? (promiscuous, unhappy)
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These are very small things, but they are all biological in nature, not sociological constraints that have been specifically created to disempower men.
This is changing and is personally not something that I've noticed. I find that women are just as superficial as men, while demanding way more in other areas (such as finances).
As you said, this no longer matters in this society (the fruits of which were built by men, but enjoyed by women).
Again, biological. You can barely even consider this to be an advantage.
Again, biological. Women's primary roles are designed to be reproductive.
Again, it's about the same. Third wave feminism has said specifically that women do not need to get married or have children. There is far less pressure on women to do anything.
As I've said, women have far more advantages in today's society, all of which are socially constructed.
Personally, if I'm weighing advantages vs. disadvantages, I don't care how I get them. Biological, socially constructed...who gives a ****? Sure, the socially constructed ones are something we have a greater capacity to neutralize, but neither one is getting fixed, so complaining about either has the same effect.
Quote:
Originally Posted by gazzaa2
But if a man is shy, lacking in confidence and not rich then he's probably screwed whatever he looks like.
Well, that's a different issue. The same can be said about women with less than desirable qualities.
Quote:
Originally Posted by AceCutty
At least, they have an opportunity to play the game. The average man is just sitting on the sidelines.
Besides, women want sex just as much as men do. So if they can score with the hottie, while tricking the average guy into courting her, then it's a win for her. See the CAD vs. DAD argument for details.
Assuming that you mean that the urge is just as strong, then no, they don't...which is why men are the ones doing the courting in the first place. It's also why men place so much more value on "playing the game" rather than looking for the long term...because "getting to play at all" is a more significant drive for men than women.
I can assure you that a lot of women read that post and thought to themselves "who cares about 'an opportunity to play the game'? Because they don't value that particular step as much as men do.
We had another thread recently on who "holds which cards" at which stage in the relationship. Naturally, nobody agreed, but I'm of the opinion that men do when it comes the longevity of the relationship, and I'm also of the opinion that THAT is something that women value more highly than men. Why? Because it's in shorter supply (just as "getting a foot in the door" is in shorter supply for the average man).
We all covet more highly that which is harder for us to get. If one were to tone it down to the basest of cliches, then for men, it would be "getting a foot in the door" and for women, it would be "keeping it there".
Some guys use a 1-10 scale for a woman's looks. And they'll say a woman who is a 6 or 7 like that's bad. That's an above average-looking woman. The 5 is average.
Both genders do that, and it drives me nuts. 5-6 is average, not bad. AVERAGE.
Even if you believe this, don't you think it is reason enough to be angry?
Anger isn't constructive. But yes, people do get angry, or distressed, some of them get depressed. Others try to stay positive while they put their energy into leading fulfilling lives, whatever that may mean to them.
Yeah, the same guys who get all the women so they can afford to be choosy. Women only see the guys they're interested in.
Men who aren't gods gift to women aren't that picky because they can't afford to be.
To be simple, that's not true. I have know some fat guys to reject girls because they didn't want them. Short guys who reject girls because they didn't want them. But when people tell you they have seen different, you dismiss their comments as lying and continue to argue that what you see is the be all and end all for experience.
Truthfully, some guys on this thread just want the right to complain. And it's easier to say "Women are too shallow" because they can say nothing is their fault for why they have trouble dating. Dating, like anything else will require effort - from some men and women. Not everyone hit the lottery in the looks department.
I have known some unattractive guys who look like bums, yet they still manage to have multiple women whom they got pregnant.
I can see. I have a biological advantage over a blind person: I can see what's coming without any need to rely on prompts or on my other senses.
I have that advantage. Period.
Well, among the 750,000 other advantages I have just for having been born with ovaries, of course.
And it's, technically, an unfair one (as the blind person did nothing to deserve being blind any more than I did anything to deserve sight). Biological advantages are either fair or unfair, as a person might view fairness/justice, as societal or any other type of advantage.
I actually think that women constantly talk about how "fair" everything is just so they can continue the status quo. Why wouldn't they want to do this? It benefits them entirely.
I also wonder if some of the people claiming to be men here are actually women or feminist plants.
I'm more inclined to suspect "relative happiness" than "gender conspiracy". The things that upset (or please) us are relative to how our life is going. If our life is pretty awesome, then minor things can upset us...where if our lives are going absolutely horribly, then minor things barely even go noticed.
The best conclusion I can come to is either of these:
1. AceCutty's attitude is so off-putting that women run away.
2. Every single woman on earth is horrifically entitled, expects and will automatically get a male model who makes > $250K/year (and is working his way up from there), even if she's a chain-smoking, Twinkie-chowing, 50 Hour Energy-swilling single mother with three babydaddies, only two of whom come around periodically to beat her and then leave her money for beer.
Hmmm...
I guess we're really going to have to go with Answer #2.
LMAO. I'm pretty sure that it must be Answer #2 but say it is, by the off chance, Answer #1... I think his attitude might be pretty evident to the women he meets. I have met a few of those bitter guys when I was dating. They think they're hiding it well but I can smell them a mile off
The best conclusion I can come to is either of these:
1. AceCutty's attitude is so off-putting that women run away.
2. Every single woman on earth is horrifically entitled, expects and will automatically get a male model who makes > $250K/year (and is working his way up from there), even if she's a chain-smoking, Twinkie-chowing, 50 Hour Energy-swilling single mother with three babydaddies, only two of whom come around periodically to beat her and then leave her money for beer.
Hmmm...
I guess we're really going to have to go with Answer #1.
Again, as I said, I do attract women.
However, it is very difficult to find women that are:
- pretty
- educated (in a field that is sustainable in this economy)
- of child bearing age
- does not require a ton of effort
- is kind, sweet, loyal.
For example, I met a woman that was my type (short and Asian), but she has an inexplicably dominant personality. She also has kids. It was nice that she put in all of the effort, but she was too sexually aggressive for my taste (invited herself over my apartment for sex).
Another woman was attractive but not really my type (tall and blonde). She was also older than me. She put in the effort, but, again, was too sexually aggressive and passed her child bearing years.
Another woman was attractive. She was actually age-appropriate, height-appropriate, did not have children, and had an okay job. The issue with her was that she rejected me initially. She did show interest later on (obtaining my number, asking me out), but it seemed like she was playing games and making me put in too much work. I also HATE when women reject me.
Since then, I've pretty much just stayed in my house and avoided women.
Personally, if I'm weighing advantages vs. disadvantages, I don't care how I get them. Biological, socially constructed...who gives a ****? Sure, the socially constructed ones are something we have a greater capacity to neutralize, but neither one is getting fixed, so complaining about either has the same effect.
Well, that's a different issue. The same can be said about women with less than desirable qualities.
Assuming that you mean that the urge is just as strong, then no, they don't...which is why men are the ones doing the courting in the first place. It's also why men place so much more value on "playing the game" rather than looking for the long term...because "getting to play at all" is a more significant drive for men than women.
I can assure you that a lot of women read that post and thought to themselves "who cares about 'an opportunity to play the game'? Because they don't value that particular step as much as men do.
We had another thread recently on who "holds which cards" at which stage in the relationship. Naturally, nobody agreed, but I'm of the opinion that men do when it comes the longevity of the relationship, and I'm also of the opinion that THAT is something that women value more highly than men. Why? Because it's in shorter supply (just as "getting a foot in the door" is in shorter supply for the average man).
We all covet more highly that which is harder for us to get. If one were to tone it down to the basest of cliches, then for men, it would be "getting a foot in the door" and for women, it would be "keeping it there".
Good post. I think this is a good and accurate summary.
However, it is very difficult to find women that are:
- pretty
- educated (in a field that is sustainable in this economy)
- of child bearing age
- does not require a ton of effort
- is kind, sweet, loyal.
For example, I met a woman that was my type (short and Asian), but she has an inexplicably dominant personality. She also has kids. It was nice that she put in all of the effort, but she was too sexually aggressive for my taste (invited herself over my apartment for sex).
Another woman was attractive but not really my type (tall and blonde). She was also older than me. She put in the effort, but, again, was too sexually aggressive and passed her child bearing years.
Another woman was attractive. She was actually age-appropriate, height-appropriate, did not have children, and had an okay job. The issue with her was that she rejected me initially. She did show interest later on (obtaining my number, asking me out), but it seemed like she was playing games and making me put in too much work. I also HATE when women reject me.
Since then, I've pretty much just stayed in my house and avoided women.
Ok. Being honest, what do you look like. You're a man, and you jump on women for caring about looks, but 1 of the reasons you reject some women is because to you they aren't pretty. You even mention you have a height and racial type. Why is it you can be uninterested in a woman for not being pretty or your type, yet you somehow think other men don't do this? That lady you said was going for "out of her league" a few posts back may not have done anything. Other than not have the right height, hair color, age, or he hated that she approached him.
Then you reject a woman because she was older than you, and you think she can't have kids.
Then you reject women who are "too aggressive" but then complain that women don't do enough work, and get everything for free. You could have had a woman that initiated and put in effort - and also got some easy sex without dinner or a date. But you turn that down.
So what do you want? Do you want a liberal woman who initiates and makes bold moves - because sex probably comes with that as well. Or an what's considered an old-fashioned woman that may not be aggressive. If it's the latter, then that will take more patience. A sexually demure woman will want to make sure the guy likes her as a person, and not just her body. So she'll want to date him longer and spend more time with him before anything sexual happens. Some guys consider this "jumping through hoops." The aggressive women you turn down are more free, and they don't have that same thought process. But you hate the former, thinking they're too snotty. And you reject the latter for being too easy.
Last edited by HappyRain; 03-03-2016 at 01:38 PM..
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