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My husbands uncle is here from the Dominican Republic. My husband told me a month ago that there was a possibility that he and his family will be staying one night with us (they are 4). It was supposed to be a one night thing. They were going to come spend the night and leave in the morning. They were only coming for the papal visit and there was uncertainty about them staying longer. Anyway, yesterday we find out that they are going to be here a week longer then expected. Of course my husband welcomed them to stay in our house but I am so uncomfortable about it for several reasons.
First I am 37 weeks pregnant, just about ready to pop, and honestly am not in the mood to have 4 people staying in our very small 2 bedroom apartment. The thought of going into labor while they are all here is stressing me out!
Second we have a small 2 bedroom, and we are 4 ourselves. Because of this visit our boys have to sleep in our bedroom with us, and they are sleeping in their bedroom on their bunk beds. It's going to completely disrupt our routine of getting the boys ready for school in the morning.
Third, I feel like we are spending extra money that we are not in the position to be spending, by having visitors in our house for a week, we will have to make sure that there is adequate food in the house for 4 extra mouths. That is very expensive.
Fourth, although I know his family, this family lives in the DR, and I hardly know them. I kinda don't feel comfortable staying all day alone with them while my husband is at work during the week.
I can honestly deal with the other stuff as they are not that big of a deal. But the part that is stressing me out is the whole idea of going into labor while they are here. Not only for the labor part, but the idea of coming home with a newborn to an apartment that has 4 visitors is not something I want to do. It's going to be extremely stressful having our two boys sleeping in our room, plus a newborn that I will have to care for in the middle of th night. I think I will go crazy.
I mentioned this to husband and his answer was that he didn't think there was a provlem. That I am just worrying for nothing and that I am the only one with a problem.
Do you think I am worrying for nothing and stressing out for no reason?
House guests are like fish, they start to stink after a day and need to be thrown out. No, you are not being unreasonable, your Hubby is. At 37 weeks his concern should be for you and that added stress and work is the last thing you need to have on your plate.
You know the old saying, "If Mama ain't happy, nobody is happy" so let him know in no uncertain terms it is time for the fish to be tossed out. I hate house guests, and I won't stay at someone else's house either.
House guests are like fish, they start to stink after a day and need to be thrown out. No, you are not being unreasonable, your Hubby is. At 37 weeks his concern should be for you and that added stress and work is the last thing you need to have on your plate.
You know the old saying, "If Mama ain't happy, nobody is happy" so let him know in no uncertain terms it is time for the fish to be tossed out. I hate house guests, and I won't stay at someone else's house either.
Don
I guess what makes me feel guilty is that I never have this problem whenever we have guest that I am close to. The difference is that my friends and family would never impose themselves on us in this manner. The most they would probably stay is 1 or 2 nights, and they wouldn't even entertain the idea of staying during a time like this where we are about to have a new baby
I hate to sound like a whiny baby, and i always like to compromise with people which is why I have not made a big deal of this. Considering he has never complained whenever I have had a visitor from my side (Although it has been very rare).
They just got here yesterday, and went to PA today for the papal visit and will be back on Monday. I told my husband i need exact dates of when they will be here, because he seems cluesless when it comes to how long they will be here for. I hope my body does not decide to go into labor early , and will come after they have left.
I think you are being a little over the top.....but they did change the visit from a day to a week....so you do have some room to speak up.
How much do you want to alienate your husband's family?
Over the top? I disagree entirely.
I am with Don on this one, I hate house guests and have never once put that burden on anyone. They came here from the DR, they should be able to afford to travel the proper way and get their own place to stay while they are here. For them not to recognize they are overstepping their boundaries bringing 4 extra people into a small two bedroom with an expectant mother is just downright rude and ignorant. The OP's Husband should be a man and kick them to the curb and never should have let them stay in the first place.
I am with Don on this one, I hate house guests and have never once put that burden on anyone. They came here from the DR, they should be able to afford to travel the proper way and get their own place to stay while they are here. For them not to recognize they are overstepping their boundaries bringing 4 extra people into a small two bedroom with an expectant mother is just downright rude and ignorant. The OP's Husband should be a man and kick them to the curb and never should have let them stay in the first place.
Guess it depends on the family.....because house guest are not always viewed as worth kicking family to the curb over.
I guess the wife should divorce the husband and send him back to his family then. That seems to be your over reaction.
Guess it depends on the family.....because house guest are not always viewed as worth kicking family to the curb over.
I guess the wife should divorce the husband and send him back to his family then. That seems to be your over reaction.
Who is being over the top now ? All we are saying is that to jam 4 extra people into a small apartment, with her being ready to deliver, is VERY inconsiderate of Hubby and the guests. I would NEVER, no make that NEVER ! do that to anyone. His first priority should be her......period.
He should simply be a man and tell the family that, under the circumstances, it is not possible for them to stay more than the one night. No harm in doing that, and family should understand. (But maybe in the DR they jam 20 people into one house)
I totally agree with Don. Her husband's priority should be her and the kids - especially this late in the pregnancy. For him to just blow off her concerns is callous.
OP, I'd suggest sitting down with him and going over it again. Make sure to mention all the points you laid out here. Do they have any other family in the area? Maybe if you had a suggestion of an alternative it might help.
I totally agree with Don. Her husband's priority should be her and the kids - especially this late in the pregnancy. For him to just blow off her concerns is callous.
OP, I'd suggest sitting down with him and going over it again. Make sure to mention all the points you laid out here. Do they have any other family in the area? Maybe if you had a suggestion of an alternative it might help.
The only other location would be his parents house who lives in a 1 bedroom apartment. The would have normally gone over there , but sister in law is staying with her with her daughter.
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I hate house guests, and I won't stay at someone else's house either.
All we are saying is that to jam 4 extra people into a small apartment, with her being ready to deliver, is VERY inconsiderate of Hubby and the guests. I would NEVER, no make that NEVER ! do that to anyone. His first priority should be her......period.
