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Location: RI, MA, VT, WI, IL, CA, IN (that one sucked), KY
41,938 posts, read 36,935,179 times
Reputation: 40635
Quote:
Originally Posted by VanillaChocolate
Well the person they paid for was clearly ok with selling their body in the 1st place. Unless he raped the hooker, it was a mutual encounter, and both parties left with what they intended to get out of the experience. That doesn't mean the guy is not relationship material, or that he is dehumanizing toward all women, or even the hookers. Some men actually do respect girls in the profession. Not all men who use them are disgusting and abusive toward them. So a man that has been to a hooker can very well be capable of being a decent person, and respectable partner for a relationship.
That would be true except lots of hookers aren't engaging in mutual encounters. They're trafficked, pimped, forced into it, or otherwise coerced into it and have no real choice.
Even if it is a mutual / equal encounter, it is still the purchase of a body and not a sexual transaction. And that is what most people I know object to. The objectifying of the female body.
Some women don't want a serious relationship with a man who has slept with a lot of escorts.
Some men don't want a serious relationship with a woman who has slept with a lot of men.
What is trivial to one person might be important to another.
Most men in general don't want a serious relationship with a woman who's been with a bunch of guys at once, especially if it has been a regular basis.
This pretty much sums it up. I think the reason is because the average woman can get sex anytime they want, so if their doing it constantly than they don't respect themselves enough & give it up way too easy. And that's where it becomes a turn off for the guy in terms of wanting a serious relationship with them. While in most guys cases, he has to put in a lot of work to even get to sleep with 1 woman unless he's very attractive.
Location: RI, MA, VT, WI, IL, CA, IN (that one sucked), KY
41,938 posts, read 36,935,179 times
Reputation: 40635
Quote:
Originally Posted by Jersey4Life
This pretty much sums it up. I think the reason is because the average woman can get sex anytime they want, so if their doing it constantly than they don't respect themselves enough & give it up way too easy. And that's where it becomes a turn off for the guy in terms of wanting a serious relationship with them. While in most guys cases, he has to put in a lot of work to even get to sleep with 1 woman unless he's very attractive.
What does being able to get sex anytime they want (with people they have no desire to sleep with) have anything to do with 3somes? Lots of the people I've met / dated that I know have had 3somes slept with relatively few people, they just experimented some.
And no, most average dudes don't have to work to sleep with someone, if they just want to get laid. It's never been easier. Set up an OLD profile (or even download an app), make a few dates, and if the average dude isn't socially inept sex will happen.
Honestly some of these pearl clutchers were born at least a century too late.
Now let's not get off-topic. Pearl-clutching is another kink entirely.
Quote:
Originally Posted by usayit
It wouldn't bother me either way.
If I were to participate, it would have be among FWBs (MFF or MMF.. or whatever). Casual sex never really did it for me
Quote:
Originally Posted by usayit
I always assumed it was because they would have to compete with that experience. Meaning that at some point in time, the woman would want to re-experience the feeling of being worshiped by multiple men. Then it brings it back to how many men are ok with MFF but not MMF.
Mine was with two friends, one of whom I roomed with two summers later. I think that's the best way to do it, just three single people who know each other. No complications, no wounded feelings.
But no, that doesn't mean someone will want to do it again. It's been 30 years and I still haven't.
Quote:
Originally Posted by ScarletG
Everyone...well....most everyone and anyone that is interesting...has a past of some sort.
Yep.
OP, you'd be surprised at what people you know have done. The ER doc who saves your life, the person who hires you, the person who does your taxes, the chef who prepares your food, your relatives, maybe even your parents. Kinsey proved all of this a long, long time ago. Just because no one has told you of their experiences, that doesn't mean they haven't had them. I can pretty much guarantee there is a dungeon-master, swinger, submissive, or fetishist in your life somewhere, but you wouldn't know because you're not in their bedrooms. You may say it doesn't matter to you because you're not in a relationship with them, but moralizing is moralizing. If you think something is degrading, you're judging people you know, and maybe even people you love. And if you claim no kinks, I put it to you that you either haven't found your kink yet, you're in denial, or you're an outlier. Trust me on this, and come back when you're 40 and tell us how much it matters to you then.
What does being able to get sex anytime they want (with people they have no desire to sleep with) have anything to do with 3somes? Lots of the people I've met / dated that I know have had 3somes slept with relatively few people, they just experimented some.
And no, most average dudes don't have to work to sleep with someone, if they just want to get laid. It's never been easier. Set up an OLD profile (or even download an app), make a few dates, and if the average dude isn't socially inept sex will happen.
Trust me, a lot of guys have a very hard time getting laid through OLD. Women are way more pickier online than in person.
What I meant was that women can get casual sex anytime they want. They can go on OLD or to a bar & get laid multiple times a week if they really wanted to. I was just responding to that person's message where they said a lot of men don't want a serious relationship with a woman that's been with a lot of men. And being in a 3-some makes it even worse in a lot of men's eyes. They just find it an instant turn off.
Now let's not get off-topic. Pearl-clutching is another kink entirely.
Mine was with two friends, one of whom I roomed with two summers later. I think that's the best way to do it, just three single people who know each other. No complications, no wounded feelings.
But no, that doesn't mean someone will want to do it again. It's been 30 years and I still haven't.
Yep.
OP, you'd be surprised at what people you know have done. The ER doc who saves your life, the person who hires you, the person who does your taxes, the chef who prepares your food, your relatives, maybe even your parents. Kinsey proved all of this a long, long time ago. Just because no one has told you of their experiences, that doesn't mean they haven't had them. I can pretty much guarantee there is a dungeon-master, swinger, submissive, or fetishist in your life somewhere, but you wouldn't know because you're not in their bedrooms. You may say it doesn't matter to you because you're not in a relationship with them, but moralizing is moralizing. If you think something is degrading, you're judging people you know, and maybe even people you love. And if you claim no kinks, I put it to you that you either haven't found your kink yet, you're in denial, or you're an outlier. Trust me on this, and come back when you're 40 and tell us how much it matters to you then.
You don't get to dictate what others choose to discuss.
Neither do you. Calling sex talk crass, that's just silly.
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