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It would be very low class, imho. If a gentleman invites a lady to dinner or drinks, he picks up the tab. Period. If you're worried about a hole in your wallet, don't go to an expensive restaurant. But then I'm an old codger....
Nothing wrong with it. Not my style, but we all don't like the same things, right.
My advice to you is to tell her you plan on going Dutch on this first date (so she can make sure she has cash on her and budget her meal accordingly... and there are no unpleasant surprises). If it works out, you can always "surprise" her by paying for the whole meal.
And an offshoot of this post, women should always be prepared to pay for their first date meal because you never know if you are dating a more traditional man or a more liberal one like the OP. "Be prepared" isn't just for Boy Scouts.
Good luck with the date!
I guess you missed my last sentence...If she is faking having money, oh well.
Oh - so a hole in your wallet versus possible access to "her hole". Gotcha...purely a business transaction. If you look and you like it, you'll decide to "rent it"...otherwise she pays her own way. This is NOT a date...purely a business proposition and you should make that very clear to her up front so she can fairly decide if that's what she wants to do. Haha - "Have I got a proposition for you.....!" haha
Very classy - typically, if you ask to meet, then you pay - that would work the same for her.
Are you serious?
I don't know if you know this, but there is no such thing as a free lunch.
When you spend x, you expect to get x back. Whether it's to feel better about yourself, to avoid going to jail, to eat, to show your potential mate that you are a good provider (roll eyes), etc.
I guess you missed my last sentence...If she is faking having money, oh well.
I had not yet had enough coffee. At least that's my excuse and I am sticking to it.
If a woman offers to pay for the date or asks to go Dutch and you want her to, let her. Again, not my style, but if you are comfortable with it and she is too, why not? Especially if you don't think you will have another date. If things are going that badly and you two just don't click, she may be thinking the same thing you are and knows she's not interested (and doesn't want to come across as someone using you for a meal ticket).
My philosophy is simple. If I don't like a girl enough to pay for her lunch/dinner, I will never ask her to go out in the first place. WTH would I waste my and her time.
That's kind of what I took from the OP too. If you know you aren't interested in a second date, why go out on the first one, unless you are just looking for a hookup? Though to be fair, it wasn't clear if this was known from the outset or realized during the date. Of course, I'm old school in that I believe going out on a first date is to determine if there is enough interest to see the person again for a second and possibly 3rd, 4th etc dates.
The last three dates I had, one ordered before I got there and didn't make a move to get up when I went to order my drink (coffee - set up by a friend), one stood behind me in such a way I couldn't tell what his intentions were when it came to paying (coffee - speed dating) and one I offered to pay but he refused to let me (coffee - OKC). I just assume when I go out on a first date I am going to pay for myself.
The solution for that kind of thing starts before you even go out.
If you ASK her out in a way that implies you are "taking her out to dinner," it would not be cool to switch gears halfway through.
If she offers, you can always "let" her pay, of course. But if you aren't even sure you like someone, then set it up as mutual/dutch from the beginning.
Glad someone said this early in the thread. Spot on.
Quote:
Originally Posted by WyoNewk
It would be very low class, imho. If a gentleman invites a lady to dinner or drinks, he picks up the tab. Period. If you're worried about a hole in your wallet, don't go to an expensive restaurant. But then I'm an old codger....
The last time I went out with a guy, he paid even though I offered to contribute to the bill. He never called me for a second date, but it was nice of him to pay even though he wasn't interested. I would've been perfectly fine paying for myself though.
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