I feel stuck in my marriage (wife, men, love, separate)
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He was an emotional outlet , not a physical one. A way to vent my sexual frustration without physically compromising anything. I don't really have a choice to stay married or not, since I don't have a very good reason to want to leave. People on and off this board have made it clear that a sexually unsatisfactory marriage is no reason to end things. We have children so mommy has to think about them, not herself, right?
Yeah...
But...
Having any type of affair compromises your relationship with your significant other.
I can't speak for her husband but if my spouse had admitted to an emotional affair, I'd be gun-shy about physical intimacy, because trust has to be re-built.
Have you always been sexually incompatible? Do you think his religious background plays a part in this? Is everything you brought up off the table? Are you talking kink/bdsm that he's not into, or more tame things and he's just not willing to venture outside his comfort zone?
Marriage counseling, but I wonder if going through the Church will actually resolve these issues, and whether the counselor or bishop will side with him since he's the "head of the household." While sex within the traditional religious institution of marriage is all-good, there are some acts that are frowned upon or seen as dirty/bad/worldly in nature (as in, not missionary and not for the purpose of procreation).
When we were first married it was the normal just wanting to get it on type sex of newly weds, then 2 years later the twins come along and I had horrible post partum depression and was on antidepressants and my sex drive was waaaay down. He tells me the 6 years it took me to get over the depression and both of us being full time students killed his sex drive, so now that I'm rearing to go again he isn't.
As for your other question, I'm not sure how to answer without violating the pg-13 nature of the forum. Let's just say I'd like to get pretty kinky, not just spicy. But he isn't interested in much outside of normal hetero intercourse. And I know for a fact any counseling we got through church would be pointless in trying to convince him to do to me what I want him to.
When we were first married it was the normal just wanting to get it on type sex of newly weds, then 2 years later the twins come along and I had horrible post partum depression and was on antidepressants and my sex drive was waaaay down. He tells me the 6 years it took me to get over the depression and both of us being full time students killed his sex drive, so now that I'm rearing to go again he isn't.
I can't speak for her husband but if my spouse had admitted to an emotional affair, I'd be gun-shy about physical intimacy, because trust has to be re-built.
But I didn't physically cheat, what I did with this other guy wasn't much different then porn. Would you feel the same way knowing your partner was looking at porn?
But now that I'm over it, it's just too bad for me? I suppose that is what I get. Karma for being sexually unavailable for so long, now I'm being punished or something.
Wish you had the chance to read my thread I posted yesterday but it got deleted , it was very similar, only difference was my boyfriend isn't interested in pleasing me or satisfying me... Im not falling for another man, I just resort to porn occasionally , but hate to say it he seems stuck in his ways if that's the case you either deal with him and love him for who he is or move on or try swinging if thats something he may be into
Hahaha, he'd NEVER consider it. Never, not in a million years of he had a gun to his head ever.
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