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Where were you going with this? I ask that respectfully, was curious what this could indicate..
Patterns. She is stuck in the same pattern as before. She's pretty much doing the same thing with this guy as she did with the abusive/push-pull guy. She's just using different techniques to let the guy jerk her around.
She is not being any more proactive this time around than she was with the other guy. She is still agonizing over him and letting him control the situation.
More than likely this originates from not having of healthy role models in her parents, particularly her dad.
Patterns. She is stuck in the same pattern as before. She's pretty much doing the same thing with this guy as she did with the abusive/push-pull guy. She's just using different techniques to let the guy jerk her around.
She is not being any more proactive this time around than she was with the other guy. She is still agonizing over him and letting him control the situation.
More than likely this originates from not having of healthy role models in her parents, particularly her dad.
What is it you think she should be doing?
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Getting out of the dysfunctional break-up/get back together patterns.
Going true non-contact. Forever.
Not taking his calls or texts. Blocking his number. Not waiting around for him to change his mind. Not agonizing over why he is doing this or not doing that.
Non-contact means just that. You don't talk or text. You don't sit around waiting and hoping that he will change his mind.
Patterns. She is stuck in the same pattern as before. She's pretty much doing the same thing with this guy as she did with the abusive/push-pull guy. She's just using different techniques to let the guy jerk her around.
She is not being any more proactive this time around than she was with the other guy. She is still agonizing over him and letting him control the situation.
More than likely this originates from not having of healthy role models in her parents, particularly her dad.
Ty for your reply. Where does "guys always leaving you" come in with this? I understand your point but I thought you meant guys leave her...for a reason.
Ty for your reply. Where does "guys always leaving you" come in with this? I understand your point but I thought you meant guys leave her...for a reason.
And OP- you explained that isn't the case.
I meant she picks guys who are basically unavailable and leave her because that's one of the things that unavailable guys do.
I meant she picks guys who are basically unavailable and leave her because that's one of the things that unavailable guys do.
Some time during that awful relationship I spoke of earlier. The last few months he became obsessed with me, not wanting to leave my house. I couldn't even get up to use the bathroom without him freaking out asking where I was going. Very sickening. It was crazy how the tables had turned, because the first year of us dating, yes he did play with my feelings. Don't give this jerk any master manipulator credit though. He was a malnourished, disgusting, loser. Not even his own family could stand him. & I felt bad for him. Yes, it's THAT story. Me, wanting to be the savior! "Change him for the better!" He had ZERO to offer. No motivation, barely worked. Everything wrong in a "man" you can think of.
I think a lot of woman can vouch for me here, we all go through that ONE god awful relationship that makes us cringe to the fullest.
PRESENT: In my situation now, as a couple, we had everything going for us. Great communication, he can walk into a room and still give me butterflies, do I need to explain anymore? SO YEAH, it's a little hard letting go. He reached a breaking point that I had nothing to do with. It's sad that our relationship has had to pay the consequences. I can't just rip these feelings off my chest. Do I wish? Sometimes, but then what kind of person would that make me?
Some time during that awful relationship I spoke of earlier. The last few months he became obsessed with me, not wanting to leave my house. I couldn't even get up to use the bathroom without him freaking out asking where I was going. Very sickening. It was crazy how the tables had turned, because the first year of us dating, yes he did play with my feelings. Don't give this jerk any master manipulator credit though. He was a malnourished, disgusting, loser. Not even his own family could stand him. & I felt bad for him. Yes, it's THAT story. Me, wanting to be the savior! "Change him for the better!" He had ZERO to offer. No motivation, barely worked. Everything wrong in a "man" you can think of.
I think a lot of woman can vouch for me here, we all go through that ONE god awful relationship that makes us cringe to the fullest.
PRESENT: In my situation now, as a couple, we had everything going for us. Great communication, he can walk into a room and still give me butterflies, do I need to explain anymore? SO YEAH, it's a little hard letting go. He reached a breaking point that I had nothing to do with. It's sad that our relationship has had to pay the consequences. I can't just rip these feelings off my chest. Do I wish? Sometimes, but then what kind of person would that make me?
Too bad you don't see the patterns of your and enabling behavior that you have acted out in each relationship. That means the next relationship will probably end with the same patterns going on again.
Too bad you don't see the patterns of your and enabling behavior that you have acted out in each relationship. That means the next relationship will probably end with the same patterns going on again.
You are so entrenched in your personal biases you can't see the OP is a smart, mature, head on her shoulders, doing the right thing, got it going on super chick.
Give it a rest man.
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