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I guess that is sort of a silver lining, isn't it? If I could have kept that single aspect of being shy and avoided the social, academic, and professional retardation.........well see now I'm not even being very accepting, am I? Obviously, my thoughts on this, especially at nearly 2 AM, are pretty sour.
Has your life really been so bad because of it, or did you overcome it?
I am aware that many women complain about there not being any good men or are irritated by the "losers" (in their words) who approach them on a regular basis. Yet, they refuse to actually talk to the men that they like behind the guise of "it's a man's job to approach." Actually, I think it's because they themselves don't want to be rejected.
So my question is, if they KNOW that no one wants to be rejected, why do so many women write guys off for being shy with women or for "lacking confidence"? You would think that since they obviously have the same issue, they would have more sympathy and understanding, no?
Because being shy is a HUGE turnoff for most women along the lines of a lack of confidence and low masculinity. When women don't have "compassion" it's not a conscious decision - it's an autopilot response.
Shyness is something that can be overcome. I was extremely shy and awkward when I was younger, in fact I never dated in high school. There were other factors for this, but the shyness was a big part of it. You just have to force yourself to be more proactive and with time it gets easier. Rejection is a part of life, whether dating, job hunting, promotion, etc. Not everyone will be compatible with you, in fact the majority won't.
Lol, you didn't hear me the first time. Women don't approach relationships from a logical standpoint. They're not concerned about being fair, consistent, right. A woman responds to you based on how you make her feel.
Oh, please. Dating isn't logical, and no one's (female or male) romantic life is a charity. If I date someone, it's going to be because I think he's cool and fun and attractive and I want to spend time with him, not because I feel bad for him and he deserves a chance. That's not how it works for most people. It's not lacking compassion.
no one's (female or male) romantic life is a charity. If I date someone, it's going to be because I think he's cool and fun and attractive
Agreed.
Any man who believes that women should give him a chance simply for existing will be waiting for a VERY long time. Women want men who are attractive, funny, popular, charismatic, successful, and a host of other qualities that don't involve wallowing in self-pity 24/7.
Oh, please. Dating isn't logical, and no one's (female or male) romantic life is a charity. If I date someone, it's going to be because I think he's cool and fun and attractive and I want to spend time with him, not because I feel bad for him and he deserves a chance. That's not how it works for most people. It's not lacking compassion.
I like the underlined, and came to post something similar. Without trying to sound antagonistic, my answer to the OP's question is, "why should they"? Since we're speaking logically, what motivation does a woman have to "give a shy guy a chance" when there are plenty of other guys willing to pick up the slack?
It's not just the case with shy vs. not shy, this applies to anything one looks for in a relationship. If what you want is readily available, there's no need for you to put additional effort in to finding more.
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