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Its often the women with children that leave the meeting of the child and boyfriend to a time when the man they date looks like a permanent boyfriend. Too confusing for children to be meeting a new one every other week. Never date a man or woman who hasnt got the final decree as often theres no divorce pending or one that has been dropped. Never date someone who has just gotton divorced.
Talking about naming your kids on the first date? This thing would have ended soon anyway. Fast in = fast out.
As far as his marital / kid status, this is way too soon for him to be getting involved with someone. If you are going to date a guy who is divorced with kids in the future, you need to give it at least a couple of years after the divorce is final. Otherwise, you will just get caught up in a bunch of drama storms.
1) Watch the first episode of Sex and the City for insight into "what happened"
2) It's normal for someone to not want a significant other to meet their kids until things are serious. I agree with this. Why confuse your kid introducing them to every Tom, Dick, and Harry that passes through?
He is separated for a year and has a 9 year old, whom he is utterly and tenderly devoted to (mentioned his son incessantly in his online dating profile, spoke of him often, sees him every other day, shared photos with me, etc). Gentleman in question came on very strongly (e.g.was naming our children on our first date) (I indicated that I would be open to having a family someday) and how excited his son would be to have a sibling. While I was taken aback by his forwardness, I became caught up in this man very quickly, and let my heart and loins lead me.
The red flag of his forwardness aside (which sounds like he was just desperate to have some kind of stability and a feeling of a future and family life even though he's nowhere near ready for that), when I tried OLD, I completely avoided men who rambled on about their kids in their profiles, had pictures of their kids in their profiles, or, even worse, whose main profile pictures actually included their kids. It just drove home the point that we would never be on equal footing in terms of what we could devote to the relationship and each other, and there was just something icky about a man posting pictures of his kids on his dating profile like they were selling points or something. Like, "Thanks for letting the women here know that you pretty much have this family and life already set in stone and you're looking for an 'add-on,' and no, that snot on your kid's face is not all that endearing."
Not that I actually said any of that to them, but it's what I thought. Yes, you have a kid. You love your kid and your kid is a priority in your life. We get it. Go find someone who already has kids so you can both come second in each other's lives and wipe snot together.
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