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Status:
"Just livin' day by day"
(set 18 days ago)
Location: USA
3,166 posts, read 3,356,252 times
Reputation: 5382
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Inkpoe
I could've swore hearing that addicts aren't supposed to enter into new romantic relationship (or rekindle old ones) when they're going through the program. As it is, they're not emotionally ready to take on the task.
OP, your friend is more likely to get burned. So stop "hoping" for your friend and get real. Such a FusterCluck. Are you even close to this friend where you can express concerns?
I'm not even going there. They're grown adults. It's best to let them to deal with it themselves. Like the old adage goes "Love is Blind."
This doesn't sound all that healthy from an outside point of view, first off, if you divorce, you need time to get your brain rebooted time to heal a bit and not jump into a relationship right away, second, the guy needs to demonstrate a year or two of sobriety and responsible behavior, I'm not a 12 stepper myself, but this is what I hear from them.
I could've swore hearing that addicts aren't supposed to enter into new romantic relationship (or rekindle old ones) when they're going through the program. As it is, they're not emotionally ready to take on the task.
OP, your friend is more likely to get burned. So stop "hoping" for your friend and get real. Such a FusterCluck. Are you even close to this friend where you can express concerns?
That's correct. I briefly dated a guy in recovery, and he told me for the first 12 months it was recommended he not get romantically involved with anyone. (We dated when he had been in recovery for about 3 years I think?)
My feeling is that even if addiction issues weren't there, this could be problematic.
Generally, if people have broken up, it was for a reason or reasons. Despite rose-colored glasses about the past, those issues will generally still be there (or will resurface).
Also, how can one trust a person who left a committed relationship (marriage) for a grass-is-greener situation? I always feel that's the biggest issue with cheating and leaving. The person you "won" is a cheater. Why couldn't s/he cheat on you next?
We use to have a word for chicks like her in collage who would bounce back and forth after professing her love for every new man she allowed to get to know her
We use to have a word for chicks like her in collage who would bounce back and forth after professing her love for every new man she allowed to get to know her
"Loopy _ itch"
Agreed, my first post was a bit nicer, but yeah, I agree here....
Lol you and your friend are F'd up....both of you need to start fresh and hit up the local NA meeting for fresh meat. It's not a good idea to ever sample a friend's ex, especially one that used and stole thousands from them. How desperate for human touch can people be?
Status:
"Just livin' day by day"
(set 18 days ago)
Location: USA
3,166 posts, read 3,356,252 times
Reputation: 5382
Quote:
Originally Posted by JerZ
My feeling is that even if addiction issues weren't there, this could be problematic.
Generally, if people have broken up, it was for a reason or reasons. Despite rose-colored glasses about the past, those issues will generally still be there (or will resurface).
Also, how can one trust a person who left a committed relationship (marriage) for a grass-is-greener situation? I always feel that's the biggest issue with cheating and leaving. The person you "won" is a cheater. Why couldn't s/he cheat on you next?
Great post JerZ. Right, he seemed happy about getting back together with her and making things right. I'd just hate to see the progress he made so far go up in flames then he starts using again because things didn't work out. Or when times gets tough, she ends up leaving him for another man.
I do think one reason he wants to get back together with her so he can have a place to live. Currently, he lives with his mom.
Quote:
Originally Posted by rego00123
We use to have a word for chicks like her in collage who would bounce back and forth after professing her love for every new man she allowed to get to know her
"Loopy _ itch"
Bwhahaha
Quote:
Originally Posted by vigueur2014
Lol you and your friend are F'd up....both of you need to start fresh and hit up the local NA meeting for fresh meat. It's not a good idea to ever sample a friend's ex, especially one that used and stole thousands from them. How desperate for human touch can people be?
LoL. I have no desire ever getting sexually involved with him ever again. And I don't think it would be a good idea for his recovery in making a good life for himself.
Lol you and your friend are F'd up....both of you need to start fresh and hit up the local NA meeting for fresh meat. It's not a good idea to ever sample a friend's ex, especially one that used and stole thousands from them. How desperate for human touch can people be?
^ This. Honestly I found the thread title misleading. What a twisted tale... Sounds like the OP's just tryin to throw shade @ these two - for whatever reason.
Status:
"Just livin' day by day"
(set 18 days ago)
Location: USA
3,166 posts, read 3,356,252 times
Reputation: 5382
Quote:
Originally Posted by D217
^ This. Honestly I found the thread title misleading. What a twisted tale... Sounds like the OP's just tryin to throw shade @ these two - for whatever reason.
What is that supposed to mean? If they want to be together, then more power to them. I'll be their friend from a distance with no judgement
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