Welcome to City-Data.com Forum!
U.S. CitiesCity-Data Forum Index
Go Back   City-Data Forum > General Forums > Relationships
 [Register]
Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
View detailed profile (Advanced) or search
site with Google Custom Search

Search Forums  (Advanced)
Reply Start New Thread
 
Old 01-02-2016, 08:11 AM
 
Location: NY>FL>VA>NC>IN
3,563 posts, read 1,870,963 times
Reputation: 5996

Advertisements

Quote:
Originally Posted by Sonic_Spork View Post
I see nothing wrong at all with this on its face. It doesn't make or break the thing.

The important questions are:

Is the power unbalanced in the relationship?
Does she do her share, work and home balance, of the effort in the partnership?
Does she appreciate it? Does he appreciate her?

I tend to be submissive and prefer Dominant men (yes, BDSM again) and even I can picture a man doing all of those things, and then ordering me to *ahem*...do something HE wants. A man can do all of this and still not be a total buttkisser or pushover.

And I've known some really manly men who loved to cook.

It's about balance in the relationship.

And if what OP does for his SO is what she loves and appreciates, but his friend (with whom he isn't trying to have a relationship) wouldn't go for that, and would perceive it as unmanly, well then it's a good thing he's not trying to have a relationship with said friend, no? One woman doesn't speak for all women, ever.
^^^well said! Balance, that is my point! I wouldn't want a lumberjack who was lazy and didn't do a balanced portion of the work needed to maintain. I wouldn't want a fella who treated females poorly or who took and took and gave nothing. I just like guys whose contributions to the relationship are of the old school traditional sort; prob why I am attracted to blue collar types (though never had a relationship with any, as I never traveled in those circles).

I don't get the "bad boy" (what a stupid phrase) thing, being brought up as though macho = bad.
"Bad boy" to me means a criminal type, a bar brawler idiot kinda guy. One who abuses the gal, is a cheater and a louse.

Macho is NOT "bad boy" (to me).
I like hard, tough, macho manly men to the extreme; but males of fine character, who are upstanding citizens and who DO THEIR SHARE for sure, but do not do "girly things". How is that "bad boy"?

I had a really hard time dating due to this preference *sighing*.
I mostly met men like the OP
I blame women for that; males are so emasculated they have to act like girls to even get a date.

Last edited by VexedAndSolitary; 01-02-2016 at 08:47 AM..
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message

 
Old 01-02-2016, 02:17 PM
 
7,654 posts, read 5,091,275 times
Reputation: 5036
A bad boy is those things. A guy can be a bad boy without being a criminal per say. Its like the military guys who take things off the deep end (which are usually not as good at their job, I dont need to scream and yell and posture to contol my breathing and put a bullet in someone head) vs the bar brawler, they are really the same guy just one is in a sanctioned roll and the other is not but the personality traits are the same.


Also men are up agaisnt a wall when it comes to legal matters and dating which drives behavoir, no guy wants to get too aggressive if it means a DV charge and jail time and trust me the threshold is pretty low these days as to what constitutes "DV".


Women want to have their cake and eat it too, when you deal with a manly man you dont get to get away with shananigains, you behave like a lady or your done. Women wanted to be able to cross the line while still having these men around but it does not work like that.


They wanted to be able to act bratty, use sex as a weapon, be selective prudes and keep orbiter men around if they had enough SMV while at the same time having a job and calling the shots in the office, etc etc. Then they wonder where the real men have gone.


I always liked the analogy that they wanted a knight to take them away to his castle and once there start calling the shots and deciding what goes on. Sorry it does not work like that, guys dont want all the liabilities and none of the bennifits.


Quote:
Originally Posted by OverItAll View Post
^^^well said! Balance, that is my point! I wouldn't want a lumberjack who was lazy and didn't do a balanced portion of the work needed to maintain. I wouldn't want a fella who treated females poorly or who took and took and gave nothing. I just like guys whose contributions to the relationship are of the old school traditional sort; prob why I am attracted to blue collar types (though never had a relationship with any, as I never traveled in those circles).

I don't get the "bad boy" (what a stupid phrase) thing, being brought up as though macho = bad.
"Bad boy" to me means a criminal type, a bar brawler idiot kinda guy. One who abuses the gal, is a cheater and a louse.

Macho is NOT "bad boy" (to me).
I like hard, tough, macho manly men to the extreme; but males of fine character, who are upstanding citizens and who DO THEIR SHARE for sure, but do not do "girly things". How is that "bad boy"?

I had a really hard time dating due to this preference *sighing*.
I mostly met men like the OP
I blame women for that; males are so emasculated they have to act like girls to even get a date.
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 01-03-2016, 10:18 AM
 
Location: NY>FL>VA>NC>IN
3,563 posts, read 1,870,963 times
Reputation: 5996
You sound like my sort of gent

Agree X100 with your post. Feminism is a scourge. I was a housewife for 35 years, I loved that role.

Nontraditional gender roles make me kind of nauseous. I would have been so happy being an adult pre-1940.
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 01-03-2016, 10:31 AM
 
Location: Maryland
912 posts, read 911,723 times
Reputation: 1078
Most of my men have done this for me, and I also have a bad habit of dating bad boys / very masculine men (the kicker is that they must also be well-educated -- a tough combo to find sometimes), so I have to agree with you and not her. I don't think these actions make someone a wimp or not masculine. Typically other things they do will give me that feeling. I.e. I like a man to not sit with his legs crossed at the knee, not be soft spoken, not spend more time grooming than I do, etc.
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
Please register to post and access all features of our very popular forum. It is free and quick. Over $68,000 in prizes has already been given out to active posters on our forum. Additional giveaways are planned.

Detailed information about all U.S. cities, counties, and zip codes on our site: City-data.com.


Reply
Please update this thread with any new information or opinions. This open thread is still read by thousands of people, so we encourage all additional points of view.

Quick Reply
Message:

Over $104,000 in prizes was already given out to active posters on our forum and additional giveaways are planned!

Go Back   City-Data Forum > General Forums > Relationships

All times are GMT -6. The time now is 03:49 PM.

© 2005-2024, Advameg, Inc. · Please obey Forum Rules · Terms of Use and Privacy Policy · Bug Bounty

City-Data.com - Contact Us - Archive 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11, 12, 13, 14, 15, 16, 17, 18, 19, 20, 21, 22, 23, 24, 25, 26, 27, 28, 29, 30, 31, 32, 33, 34, 35, 36, 37 - Top