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Being a chef is a career. Being a waiter/waitress isn't to me. How many waiters/waitresses out there are really passionate about their jobs? Don't give me some bs about how you know several too. I know there could be some outliers, but waiting tables isn't exactly a life goal for most people. I said I like educated guys, I didn't say their job has to correlate with their education. The OP said the guy she was dating was content. To me, that's settling when you know you can do better and be better.
For whoever asked if it was ok for me if the waiter made a high salary. The answer is no, even if he made 6 figures, I can't see myself having a connection with someone who's life goal is waiting tables, simple as that.
Let me clarify so you are not confused by his status: He is a Chef/Line Cook at Outback.........got it?
I know two women who have had one job, waitress, the first job they ever got, one has been at the same diner for 37 years, the other has been at the same diner for 27 years. Both in small towns, both loves their jobs, neither of them owns the place.
You don't always know that you can do better and be better. Did you ever think maybe the waiter really does not want to go out with you because he knows he would be settling and could do much better than you? Why would someone settle for someone so shallow, obviously high maintenance and only concerned with how impressed others are with her status.
You know, there is a line in a movie in regards to this very issue. The Prince tells the Lady of whatever, that he is expected to marry that they are not a good fit and will not make each other happy.
Her response: "I don't care about being happy, I want to be a Princess".......
For whoever asked if it was ok for me if the waiter made a high salary. The answer is no, even if he made 6 figures, I can't see myself having a connection with someone who's life goal is waiting tables, simple as that.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Hivemind31
For both of you...suppose the waiter in question was happy, taking care of himself, and making a substantial salary, as some do in more upscale restaurants. Would it still be a problem then?
If not, then yes, it is about the money and you should own up to that.
If yes, then it sounds like you have an issue with his "status" which is equally appalling in my opinion.
This, right here, is the problem. And it's not the waiter's problem.
I agree, being a waiter/waitress is not an easy job. Fluctuating pay, dealing with belligerent customers, on your feet all day, etc. Not everyone can do it.
Just a sidebar here but garbage collectors make pretty good money due to the nature of their job. And clearly you haven't had to call a plumber out to your house lately cause it pretty much costs $150 for them just to walk in the door which doesn't even cover their hourly rate and cost of materials to fix whatever is wrong. And lastly, although the actual grass cutters themselves may not make big bucks, the guy who runs the landscaping company is likely doing pretty well financially too.
In conclusion, these are not good examples to use for folks who don't make a lot of money in these jobs because they're all pretty average in that regard. Sure they're blue collar workers but they are not low paying jobs by any means.
You do realize that most plumbers work for a company? And they have a fixed wage?
FOr the garbage collectors: they make a decent living, but not really "a lot"
And your argument about the landscaping? Seriously? Common!
The guys who run the companies? How many are there? Not that many! ANd not all of them have huge ass companies making lots of money!
So yeah, I know what I was writing.
If you really want to argue they make such a great amount of money....
It is also not just about the salary, but also about the job.
My examples are pretty valid.
PS. even a plumber that works on his own (self employed) does not necessary earn so much money that he is "rich"...
Yeah, some do make a nice living, but the majority does not.
(same goes for small scale landscaping companies).
You actually seem to think that people that have their own company are all rich and making a huge amount of money....
There was no mention in the OP about his salary. Only that he was a waiter.
And in most cases, waiters don't tend to make very good money, unless its a high end restaurant.
I'm all for people doing what makes them happy, we only have one life and we should make the most of it. I'm just saying struggling to make ends meet is something that wouldn't make me happy. It's stressful.
When you marry someone, you're marrying into their financial history and future as well. This is not something that I've done, but i have friends that will think twice about continuing a relationship with someone that has high debt.
And in most cases, waiters don't tend to make very good money, unless its a high end restaurant.
I'm all for people doing what makes them happy, we only have one life and we should make the most of it. I'm just saying struggling to make ends meet is something that wouldn't make me happy. It's stressful.
When you marry someone, you're marrying into their financial history and future as well. This is not something that I've done, but i have friends that will think twice about continuing a relationship with someone that has high debt.
None of which was clarified, so you're making assumptions:
- not making very good money
- struggling to make ends meet
- has high debt
The first has some correlation with the serving industry, so I won't harp too much there. The second only has correlation with the first, so that's reaching a bit. Lastly, the third really only has correlation with the second, so that's reaching even further.
If you're going to assume all of the following for yourself and avoid anybody with a blue collar job, then that's your prerogative. But to use it as an argument against others doing so is a bit elitist. "Uppity", if you will.
And in most cases, waiters don't tend to make very good money, unless its a high end restaurant.
I'm all for people doing what makes them happy, we only have one life and we should make the most of it. I'm just saying struggling to make ends meet is something that wouldn't make me happy. It's stressful.
When you marry someone, you're marrying into their financial history and future as well. This is not something that I've done, but i have friends that will think twice about continuing a relationship with someone that has high debt.
a low salary does not equal high debt. High debt equals not having good sense. Plenty of people who make big bucks have high debt.
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